Miscellaneous: Today, I found a box of birthday candles sitting on the coffee... - FML

By Anonymous - 04/05/2009 20:28 - United States

Today, I found a box of birthday candles sitting on the coffee table. Bored, I lit one, and after a minute I threw it away and sat back down on the couch. I started looking at the box and noticed that it said "Magic Re-Lighting Candles" at the exact moment that my trash can burst into flames. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 793

You deserved it 76 033

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 30/11/2011 03:13 - United States

Today, I decided to light a candle in my room. Since fire intrigues me, I put an old brochure into it. Paper burns fast, and now my carpet has a big, black burn mark. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 291

You deserved it 72 569

By appaluver - 03/09/2011 23:53 - United States

Today, I was at my friend's house and accidentally blew out a candle that was supposed to be lit for seven days straight. It was in honor of her grandmother who had recently died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 775

You deserved it 14 793

By shiiiiit - 15/11/2009 09:23 - United States

Today, I was having trouble blowing out the last of the several candles on my bedside table. Exasperated, I blew as hard as I could, which sent hot wax from the other candles shooting into the air, all over my face and into my eyes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 179

You deserved it 12 541

Smash

By Unintended Victim - 08/12/2022 02:00

Today, I was sitting next to my friend as he blew out the candles on his birthday cake. Some asshole got the bright idea to shove his face in the cake, but they missed and pushed me in instead. The candles were still lit. My hair caught fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 037

You deserved it 108

This party is lit

By Tyler_Padgett - 24/05/2009 23:52 - United States

Today, I was lighting fireworks for my cousin's birthday in my grandmother's yard. When it came time to light the "Grand Finale", I read on the outside of the box, "Face this side towards crowd for the best result". After I lit it, I realized that it was on its side. I shot 100 fireworks at my family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 981

You deserved it 59 159

By why? - 01/05/2015 13:41 - United States

Today, I was supposed to light candles at my aunt's wedding. I accidentally lit the groom on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 001

You deserved it 6 469

By S. Bauer - 02/11/2011 13:50 - Portugal

Today, I yelled at my boyfriend for smoking in the house, because I didn't want the house to smell like smoke. While doing so, I knocked over a candle and lit the couch on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 570

You deserved it 14 923

By Anonymous - 26/06/2012 05:44 - United States

Today, I burned my nose. How? I tried sniffing a lit candle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 222

You deserved it 52 417

That blows

By Anonymous - 12/09/2022 23:30

Today, it's my birthday and I was very happy. When the moment came to blow the candles, all of the decoration on the cake flew off. It had taken an hour to make and set them on the cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 781

You deserved it 215

By Username - 13/02/2012 21:31 - India

Today, my misanthropic malcontent of a son smashed my air freshener and turned my faulty lava lamp on in a twisted act of rebellion. The bottom of the lamp broke and got wax everywhere. My room now smells like cinnamon, with a hint of freshly embalmed corpse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 921

You deserved it 4 805

Next

Top comments

wordly 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 0:52

Win :D Those candles are awesome.

greasy_broad 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 1:03

I don't understand why someone would invent a flammable object that can't be put out.

Comments

holagirl2 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 3:11

thats just funny

jSOPURE 3

Tuesday 5 May 2009 3:12

Shit happens. Lewl. :)

heatherlk4 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 3:14

i call bullshit.

livluvlaf123 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 3:19

HAHAHHHAHAHAH!!!

Zigster94 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 3:23

For all the people saying it should have been completely out .. the OP probably did put it out but it relit in the trash FYL definetly

dancin303 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 3:29

didnt your parents ever teach you not to play with matches

cyxx 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 3:29

Hahahahahaha! Perfect!

Elisa9180 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 3:38

that is hilarious

TBD3 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 3:39

That is sweet.

abcdefg11233 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 3:41

hahahahaha!

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Today, my wife informed me that she hates having sex with me, and only married me because I was dark, trim, and handsome, but now I'm just gray, fat, and soon to be single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 257

You deserved it 143

Today, having been on hold on the phone for several minutes, I felt the need to release a fart. Just as I started my release, they picked up. They definitely heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 740

You deserved it 262

Today, I greeted my girlfriend with a spinning hug. She got motion sickness and threw up all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 320

You deserved it 8 873

Today, while working as a bank teller, a woman came in with a $100k check. I commented, "Wow, I really could do with one of these!" She responded, "It's a life insurance check. I'd rather have my son back," and teared up in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 001

You deserved it 3 969

Today, I was over at a friend's house for a party. I was trying to strike up a conversation with one of my cute guy friends, so I showed him this funny picture of me that my friend took. His reply was "Hahahaa those Fatbooth pictures are hilarious!" It wasn't a Fatbooth picture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 770

You deserved it 7 215

Today, while as a therapist, a client made an audible fart and pointed out that she had done so. Shortly after, she wrinkled her nose as she savored the odor. She began to discuss her significant trauma issues. Before I could respond, her fart wafted over to me, making any mature response pointless. FML

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You deserved it 166