Health: Jog on - FML

Jog on

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, feeling out of shape, I went for a jog. I got mugged. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 735

You deserved it 2 978

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 12/01/2011 04:04 - United States

Today, while going to work, I was mugged. On the way back, I was mugged. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 620

You deserved it 3 721

By Anonymous - 18/02/2011 21:36 - United States

Today, after volunteering all day at the homeless shelter, I was mugged on my way to my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 002

You deserved it 3 577

By Tanner - 16/07/2011 06:23 - United States

Today, I got mugged. I also got an extra kick in the face for not having money in my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 463

You deserved it 3 686

Unattack dog

By woofwoof - 30/12/2014 04:17 - Turkey - Izmir

Today, I got mugged while walking my dog. He seemed to be OK with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 057

You deserved it 3 014

By anyonmus - 12/04/2013 00:59 - United States - Westminster

Today, I went for a run, and my own dog attacked me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 298

You deserved it 9 712

Bad boy

By Dammit - 31/05/2023 17:02 - United States

Today, knowing very well that I need to be more active, I went for a walk. It quickly turned into a sprint when I was attacked and chased by a dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 759

You deserved it 115

By Anonymous - 09/09/2011 13:36 - United States

Today, I decided to get back into shape. I went for a jog around my neighborhood. The ice cream truck followed me for my whole jog, mocking me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 091

You deserved it 4 268

Alexa, play "Ironic" by Alanis Morrissette

By irony, huh? - 20/10/2019 14:00

Today, I got mugged. For an actual mug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 409

You deserved it 115

By Anonymous - 16/09/2014 14:34 - United States - Wallingford

Today, I was mugged. I saw a cop car in the aftermath and flagged it down. Unfortunately, when the cops stopped the mugger, he said he'd been running away because I tried to mug him. Apparently the fact that he was "well-dressed" and I wasn't means he was telling the truth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 101

You deserved it 3 229

By insomnitude - 05/03/2011 06:55 - United States

Today, I got mugged by a midget. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 786

You deserved it 13 806

Next

Top comments

DontClickOnMe 28

Thursday 16 February 2012 8:43

Maybe they wanted you to chase them as motivation. Good job though for doing some exercise! Don't let that mugger stop you!

Blazingcrono 6

Thursday 16 February 2012 8:53

I guess the mugger gave OP a run for his money!

Comments

suzieqjew 2

Friday 17 February 2012 16:49

Look at you, lighter already!

bioman250 10

Saturday 18 February 2012 3:21

Well don't take valuables with you when you exercise. Though you could lift weights at home. So when you do go jogging you'll be like a beach balls with gorilla arms.

tarry 3

Saturday 18 February 2012 5:48

You fat, bro? Stay fat.

StayatHomeSon 9

Saturday 18 February 2012 7:06

Sorry, but that's Arkansas for ya

chryses 3

Saturday 18 February 2012 11:19

Don't get discouraged keep it up!

Stonergurl 4

Saturday 18 February 2012 23:20

It's just the universe's way of telling you that you are NOT fat.. report it to the police, it'll be allright.

lisahb 2

Wednesday 20 June 2012 21:18

that's why I don't work out.

JaybirdCPA 2

Friday 27 July 2012 6:53

Couldn't outrun the mugger eh...? Lol

samsch0 0

Monday 26 November 2012 3:32

See what happens when you exercise?!? Haha! But I am sorry for your misfortune.

ohhitsher 5

Saturday 23 March 2013 5:22

Wow. You can't even go running nowadays. Sad.

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Today, my daughter left a plate of food in her room for two hours. When I yelled at her about ants, her response was, "But I thought it took DAYS for ants to show up!" I raised this dumbass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 439

You deserved it 950

Today, my strict Christian mother walked into my room just after I'd finished masturbating. Although dressed, I was still holding the used tissue, which she noticed. Having to think fast to disguise my deed and avoid an entire sermon, I had no option but to blow my nose with the spunky tissue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 401

You deserved it 28 907

Today, it's my birthday. I share it with a guy I've been seeing for over six months. I showed up with a handmade pie and a gift bag. His ex-girlfriend accepted it for him, as he was busy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 314

You deserved it 946

Today, I told a customer the bread he wanted has been discontinued. He replied with, "Are you serious? What is your name? I'm going up front to complain about you." I still don't understand how that's specifically my fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 173

You deserved it 1 341

Today, I presented my child with the classic "Who came first, the chicken or the egg?" conundrum. In return, I got a detailed lecture on how birds evolved from dinosaurs, how life was created in the sea and an explanation about evolution. I got schooled by a 9 year old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 207

You deserved it 24 284

Today, I decided to be safe and tested a small dime-sized amount of Nair on my inner arm before using it. I didn't react badly. But as soon as it was washed off from my down-there hair I sure as hell reacted, with small bumpy red dots that look like an STD. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 485

You deserved it 13 898