Dogs, Ironic Animals I want a dog

I want a dog

Haze - - New Zealand - Wellington

Today, my parents finally fulfilled my childhood dream and got a puppy, after years of me nagging at them. The only downside is that I no longer live at home and he's not mine. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Anonymous - 28/02/2017 14:00 - United States - Troy

Today, my parents finally fulfilled my wish of a pet that I could take care of for a few years. They got a parrot. I guess 75 years or more is a few years to my parents. FML

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Good boy

Anonymous - 10/07/2025 23:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my mom bought me a puppy. I’m single, I work 14 hour days, my life is in no way suitable for pet ownership, but mom won’t take him back because she thinks I need to learn adult responsibility. I’m a senior technician with a team of 17 people, I couldn’t be more responsible if I tried. FML

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nomorepups - 31/10/2016 14:54

Today, I adopted my second dog. When I called to tell my mom about it, she sternly told me that I was not allowed to get any more dogs. I'm 28 and own my own house. FML

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Unwelcome

Anonymous - 28/10/2025 12:00

Today, for my birthday, my mum got me a puppy. I have never expressed any interest in owning a dog. She insists it’s a thoughtful gift but when I look at it, all I see is a bunch of responsibility, training it, extra bills, smells, taking it for walks, chewed furniture. Bollocks to this. FML

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New friend

Anonymous - 13/12/2023 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my kids got me a dog to replace the dog who died last year. I don’t like dogs, our old dog was my deceased wife’s dog, and I never liked it. I cared for the dog until it died of old age and fully intended to never get another one. Now I have a hyperactive puppy destroying my house. FML

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Bad omen

Anonymous - 18/06/2024 05:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend apparently lied to me when he'd said we could get a dog one day. I bought a puppy for him in secret but as soon as he saw it he was all, "What the hell is that? We’re not keeping it." It’s now with his parents, as he didn’t want it overnight or even in the house. FML

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Doggy dog world

Anonymous - 08/05/2021 13:59

Today, after I went to live with my biological mom, after she convinced me she’s been off drugs while I was living with my grandparents, she gave me one of two puppies she'd bought as a gift. Then she got arrested. Turns out she stole said puppy. Some things never change. FML

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Loveless - 05/06/2011 12:23 - Canada

Today, I bought a dog to make me feel less lonely. He ran away. FML

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DroopyDog - 27/12/2009 08:48 - Netherlands

Today, I got a puppy. I just found out I can't bring it on the family trip. To save me the trouble of finding a friend to take her in, my mum handed her back to the pound. FML

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Anonymous - 11/04/2009 03:40 - United States

Today, I finally decided to get a dog. I have always been wanting to get one ever since I was a child. I bought a $1,400 Golden Retriever. I went out for lunch a few hours later with a friend, so I left my dog in the backyard. I came back home to a broken fence and no dog. FML

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pokemyeyes 23

Tuesday 24 November 2015 12:21

If you dont live with them whats stopping you from getting your own?

tylermt1999 17

Tuesday 24 November 2015 12:10

That doesn't mean you can't go visit him! Plus, you could go get one from your local shelter and they could become friends!

TomeDr 24

Tuesday 10 December 2024 12:42

My parents finally went to Disney World AFTER all their kids were grown and out of the house.

incognitho 2

Tuesday 10 December 2024 20:06

it’s a sweet deal you get to play with the dog but you have none of the responsibility

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, my sister's boyfriend came over to the house. I thought I would be nice and cook them both a dinner along with my own. Mine took a little longer to cook, so they ate before me and went back to her bedroom. I ate alone to the sound of them having fun. FML

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Today, it's my 25th birthday, I celebrated it by cooking my favourite meal for my parents and sister, while they watched TV and house-hunted for my sister. I have yet to hear a happy birthday, receive a card, a present or a phone call. Oh, and my parents are on a diet, so they complained my cooking wasn’t "on their plan." FML

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Today, my boss joined me on my vacation, to "make sure I actually went". FML

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Today, I finally went to the bathroom after being constipated for two days. The good news? I lost two pounds. The bad news? The toilet won't flush. FML

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Today, my grandma's chihuahua was run over while I was taking her for a walk. She later whispered to me, "It should have been you." FML

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Today, we had a school reunion. The guy who bullied me throughout my high school career is now rich and married. I'm broke and single, and he specifically came up to me to point it out. FML

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