Today, my stepdad did a crap in the shape of the number 2, took a picture of it, then showed it to all my friends at my party, all while we were eating. FML
Today, my boyfriend had to give me an enema. FML
Today, they opened a new firing range behind my housing block. No big deal, except they are open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. FML
Today, while out with my boyfriend I accidentally let out a rather large fart. I was in such shock the only sentence I could make was "I farted." Clearly he was in shock too because the only words he could utter were "I know." FML
Today, I dove into the water perfectly, and my bikini bottoms came off. I splashed around nervously. This guy must have thought I was drowning, and dove in to save me. He emerged from the water carrying a half naked girl. FML
Today, I finally found out whether or not my boyfriend is cheating on me. Turns out he isn't. He is cheating on his wife, with me. FML
Today, I confronted my boyfriend about him and his female friend’s friendship making me uncomfortable. He responded by throwing the mother of all fits and punching a hole in the wall. He said I have to pay for the repair, because I "made him do it." FML
A number two in the shape of a number two? Stepdad: FTW! What a flawless victory!
wow, thats just disgusting