NSFW

Waiting…

By dammitall - 15/05/2009 18:49 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was in a bathroom stall peeing. Shortly after, I heard a couple enter the bathroom, both extremely drunk. They then had sex standing up against the stall I was in, blocking my only exit. I had to sit, wait, and listen as both parties finished. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 470

You deserved it 4 892

Workplace hook ups are never a good idea

By Fernanda - 02/05/2026 09:00 - United States

Spicy

Today, I learned I have to kiss my career goodbye, all because I decided to give a colleague road head while he was driving to a company function. I was fired and arrested for indecent exposure. Now it’s all on my record and my Master’s in Early Childhood Education can basically be used for toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 110

You deserved it 666

Saucy talk

By Anonymous - 14/04/2014 03:17 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was talking dirty with my husband over the phone while he was out of town. I started to verbally act out his fantasy and got quite into it. I was returned with silence. Embarrassed, I tried to hang up. Turns out the call had already been dropped, five minutes prior. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 032

You deserved it 7 886

Speak out

By I tried - 27/05/2024 06:00 - United States

Today, I found out that one of the students at my old school had committed suicide. Several months earlier, I'd informed the school counselor that said student appeared to be suicidal. Apparently, teachers dismissing her as "lazy" when she was actually very, very depressed was a big factor. Man, fuck that school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 743

You deserved it 90

Don't give up

By Frustrated - 24/08/2025 20:00 - United States

Spicy

Today, my wife complained that our sex life is too boring and vanilla. I have spent the last two years suggesting ideas to keep it interesting: S&M, swinging, roleplay, cosplay, public play, new toys, you name it. All I ever hear is, "Eww you pervert, that is disgusting and sick, how dare you even mention that." FML

I agree, your life sucks 517

You deserved it 122

Manipulation 101

By Anonymous - 12/01/2024 00:00 - Australia - Buderim

Today, my psycho sister came home. Why did she leave? To manipulate my parents to let her live here rent free. My mother built her a new bedroom, twice the size of my unit, so she can fuck my ex with privacy. She earns 4 times what I do, but doesn't have to pay rent. I own the house with mum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 759

You deserved it 164

Quick reflexes

By nahalDZ - 20/10/2012 17:29 - Germany - K?ln

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend tried to wake me with a handjob. Because I'm a very light sleeper, I woke straight away and instinctively punched whoever was touching my dick. She forgave me, but I don't think her father ever will once he finds out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 513

You deserved it 5 342

Noob

By facepalming all the way - 19/07/2015 06:02 - United States - Colorado Springs

Spicy

Today, I had to explain to my incredibly sheltered 15-year-old brother that no, you don't wear condoms on your balls, and that they don't work by squeezing your balls so the sperm are blocked from coming out when you ejaculate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 789

You deserved it 2 359

I've got the hots for you

By Jarman - 26/07/2012 05:39 - United States - Columbus

Spicy

Today, I had to turn down an offer of what seemed like some sexy time with a cute girl because my intestines were bursting with an intense desire to unleash molten lava. I rushed home to squat down, only to let out a disappointingly small piece of crud and a tiny fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 181

You deserved it 5 922

Saucy

By donutsex - 05/08/2014 16:48 - United States - Georgetown

Spicy

Today, since I work at a doughnut shop, I came home smelling like fry oil and had bits of sugar on me. My boyfriend told me he loves having sex with me right after I get off work. He said it's like having sex with a hot doughnut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 296

You deserved it 9 086

Still got game

By Anonymous - 27/09/2009 12:52 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I listened to my voice mail messages for the first time in months. One was from my Grandma that must have been meant for Gramps. I think I know now why my mother has so many siblings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 497

You deserved it 2 155

Perverted justice

By Anonymous - 23/06/2025 20:00 - Netherlands

Spicy

Today, I pretended to be a little girl on social media, just for fun. All I got was a random guy who sent me a direct message and asked me to send a photo of my private parts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 96

You deserved it 601

It's not what you think

By Kathrynn - 07/03/2009 00:41 - United States

Spicy

Today, I overheard my parents having sex. Trying to be the reasonable person I am, I dismissed it, realizing that sex is just normal. I quickly walked past their room when my cat ran past me into their room, cracking open the door. Now my parents think I was peeping and need therapy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 846

You deserved it 5 343

Classic case

By Anonymous - 25/04/2026 03:00 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, my son is complaining that girls only want to have sex with him but won’t date him, so he’s afraid he’ll never get married. Funny, my wife only wants to be married to me, but won’t have sex with me. Ain’t that ironic? FML

I agree, your life sucks 317

You deserved it 131

You learn something new every day

By Anonymous - 20/04/2026 22:00 - United States - Concord

Spicy

Today, after 40+ years of marriage, I got Peyronie's disease. Thankfully, the missus is understanding. After months of treatment, the painful bend is a bit less so, but the scar tissue that causes the bend also does not expand. Because of this, I have lost a full 5 cm / 2 inches in length when erect. FML

I agree, your life sucks 317

You deserved it 87

Let it all out

By Anonymous - 24/05/2020 17:00

Spicy

Today, I had too much to eat at dinner. I had to cut sexy time with my husband short because I couldn't do it. I feel bad because it's his birthday today but we stopped. I then proceeded to throw up everything I ate today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 562

You deserved it 671

Anger management classes going well?

By Fuckrs - 15/05/2026 15:00 - United States - Secaucus

Today, not only did my deadbeat brother mooch off me for six months, wreck my car, and screw my wife, he just successfully sued me for the medical bills he incurred when I caught them and beat him within an inch of his life. Twelve fucking grand in debt. I should have just stabbed him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 539

You deserved it 154

Pure evil

By Anonymous - 03/04/2026 20:00

Spicy

Today, my daughter admitted that she was the one who left all the used condoms in the back of my ex-husband's car, which led to us getting a horrible divorce because I thought he cheated and didn't believe him. I never suspected her for a minute. FML

I agree, your life sucks 219

You deserved it 475

That's wild

By Anonymous - 20/10/2024 20:00 - India

Today, a colleague was telling me she still breastfeeds her 4 year-old son, and that she has breastfed kids of her neighbours too. She kept talking about it and I ended up staring at her ample breasts. She noticed and asked me if I wanted too. Now I don’t know what to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 298

That was short-lived.

By adc2502 - 02/02/2018 11:00

Spicy

Today, after getting my first debit card, I spent £60 on porn online. My mum made me print off a statement at the ATM as she wanted to know where my money had gone. She saw everything and cut up my card. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 024

You deserved it 8 631

Ignorance never dies

By Racist ass - 22/08/2025 20:00 - United States - New York

Spicy

Today, my husband told our daughter to eat with her fork, not her hands. She said that in Africa, people eat with their hands. He said, "Yeah, and they cut up little girls' vaginas with a razor blade there too." Now she's traumatized. FML

I agree, your life sucks 373

You deserved it 178

This is our special place

By Anonymous - 27/04/2026 03:00 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I just moved to a new house so I was looking for new jogging routes. I ended up in an area I was unaware was a big dogging hotspot. Two couples invited me to threesomes, and when I said no and tried to leave, I had stones and litter thrown at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 299

You deserved it 82

Thin brown line

By Poopy - 12/01/2009 16:19 - United States

Spicy

Today, my man and I were having sex on edge of bed. We were using chocolate spread and I was riding him. When we were done, he got up and I noticed a long brown line on the edge of the bed. I knelt down to smell it. It was NOT chocolate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 964

You deserved it 8 260

The body keeps the score

By Sold my soul for 5000 - 26/08/2025 09:00 - United States

Spicy

Today, a guy offered me five grand for a video call. As an OnlyFans model, I jumped at the chance. He wanted me to list off everything I regretted or disliked about my life while masturbating. Fifteen minutes later, I had the worst panic attack I've ever had. Six hours later and I'm still shaking and sobbing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 197

You deserved it 604

Classic manipulation

By Anonymous - 16/05/2026 03:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my husband admitted he sometimes gets me ragingly jealous of other women on purpose because when I’m jealous I put in more effort in the bedroom and it’s easier to get me to do anal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 286

You deserved it 470

Pervert!

By Faith - 05/04/2026 09:00 - The Netherlands - Amsterdam

Today, I caught my neighbor peeping through his toilet window to watch my sister bathing in our bathroom. I asked him what he was doing, and he told me he was doing what he always does when my sister is bathing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 544

You deserved it 59

By not even - 21/07/2016 11:20 - United States - Troy

Spicy

Today, my pregnant wife suggested we have fun tonight since we haven't had sex in three months. She also said we'll be having waffles and sausage. I'm actually more excited about the food than the sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 674

You deserved it 2 783

Haunting

By Anonymous - 15/06/2024 14:00 - United States - Portland

Spicy

Today, I received a package addressed to me. Excited, I opened it in front of my whole family. Inside was a box of adult toys that I definitely did not order. Turns out, my friend Mike thought it would be hilarious to send it to me as a joke. My grandma's face will haunt me forever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 699

You deserved it 191

Proud dad

By Not a proud dad - 08/05/2026 20:00 - United States - Seattle

Today, I learned that when my daughter spent the night at her best friend's house for her 18th birthday, they made her an account on one of those "cam girl" websites, and now every time she goes over there, she masturbates for money in front of strangers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 504

You deserved it 80

Not like that!

By Anonymous - 29/08/2022 00:00 - Canada - Toronto

Spicy

Today, the universe smiled upon me and my longtime fantasy of seeing someone I know appear in an adult film finally came true. However, as a straight guy, I should have been more specific: I was hoping to see a woman I know appear in an adult film. FML

I agree, your life sucks 462

You deserved it 1 215

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Health Make up Miscellaneous Racism #FAFO NSFW Awkward Sex Intimacy AITA Love Sexism Kids Relatable Money Cars Work Homophobia Anger issues LGBTQIA+ Religion Friends Weird Jealousy Dogs Animals Technology Videos Neighbours Annoying

The Top

The Top

Today, I got stuck in an elevator for well over an hour while riding it up to my weight and fitness class. Very funny, universe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 046

You deserved it 9 481

Today, my boyfriend and I got into a serious argument and he stormed out of the house mad. Why? I wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of his knob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 412

You deserved it 17 974

Today, at a friendly get-together, my friend's husband had too much to drink and got into a fistfight with my husband. I'm seven-and-a-half months pregnant, and the friendly get-together was my baby shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 422

You deserved it 3 235

Today, my fiancé got drunk at our wedding reception and announced to his and my family what we do in bed. And it was pretty detailed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 775

You deserved it 4 147

Today, I got concussion after a goat ran in front of me while I was jogging. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 461

You deserved it 4 340

Today I wanted to get my mind off of everything COVID, so I watched my favorite TV show. It’s about COVID now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 911

You deserved it 126