AITA

Superheroes Finger Family Song Johny Johny Yes Papa Nursery Rhymes Giant Syringe

Anonymous - 16/01/2024 06:00 - United States

Today, I was babysitting my niece and let her watch cartoons on YouTube while I cooked dinner. She screamed as I was cutting up carrots and I cut myself. She had turned on an episode of Happy Tree Friends and was now crying and wouldn't stop. My brother thumped me for not watching her. I now have a cut hand and black eye. FML

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Manipulation 101

Anonymous - 12/01/2024 09:00 - Australia - Buderim

Today, my psycho sister came home. Why did she leave? To manipulate my parents to let her live here rent free. My mother built her a new bedroom, twice the size of my unit, so she can fuck my ex with privacy. She earns 4 times what I do, but doesn't have to pay rent. I own the house with mum. FML

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How did you end up here?

Anonymous - 11/01/2024 19:00 - Ireland - Waterford

Today, I learned it’s apparently a “red flag” that I, at 27, do not have any social media, get my news from the local station, watch “regular” tv (non-streamed/not YouTube), and only use the internet for research or occasional online shopping. I just prefer real life. Is that so odd? FML

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Paranoid

Anonymous - 10/01/2024 18:00 - United States - Staten Island

Today, I'm thoroughly convinced that my ex is lying about being in new relationships so she can burrow her way into my head/get my attention. Only problem is, we're in the same social circle, and if I call her on it, I'll look like a jealous idiot and my friends won't back me up. I just want these games to end. FML

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Consent

Anonymous - 10/01/2024 05:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my wife asked me to smack her ass as a sign of affection, so I did, she liked it, and we had sex. This afternoon I walked past and smacked her ass again. I now have a bruised eye, ringing in my left ear, and a severe warning to never do that again. Why? FML

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Self report

Criminy - 04/01/2024 03:00 - United States

Today, I went on yet another date with this beautiful young lady from my job. I can’t help but feel bad because ever since my wife gave birth to our kid she’s been sluggish and puffy, and I’m not attracted to her anymore, but I don’t know how to leave her because my son would be without a father. I hate this. FML

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Accident waiting to happen

Anonymous - 03/01/2024 21:00

Today, after my husband bought our son a sword for Xmas, sure enough, I found a stab mark in my living room wallpaper, and the sword now has a bent tip. My son denies everything and my husband claims I’m overreacting by yelling. FML

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Drop it

Anonymous - 01/01/2024 23:00 - United States

Today, when I tried to play my new Switch, my girlfriend yelled at me to "put down the damn video games." I've barely had five minutes to use this thing without her bitching at me. The worst part? She gave it to me, for Christmas. FML

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Roll on 2024

Anonymous - 30/12/2023 17:00 - United States - Eau Claire

Today, just after Christmas, my husband and father of my small children went and left us and I don’t know how to deal with any of it. I don’t know how to be a single mom or fix it. I want to wake up from this nightmare. I’m heartbroken, not just for myself but for my kids as well. FML

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How the turntables…

You gotta be kidding me - 25/12/2023 09:00 - United States

Today, my wife announced her support for Donald Trump for president, someone who vehemently is against immigrants. She herself is an immigrant from Colombia, who became a naturalized US citizen last year. She became this way because she was undocumented and I, a US citizen, married her so she could have papers. FML

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Age of approval

henry - 23/12/2023 21:00 - United States

Today, the 18-now-19 year-old girl who originally lead me on, ended things, then made a show of our four year age difference to the people she knew is now happily dating a 27 year-old. Her parents approve. I’m now known as a creep and lost many friends over this, but she just gets to move on? FML

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Lesson learned

Anonymous - 23/12/2023 05:00 - United Kingdom

Today, some guy has been routinely parking in my designated spot outside my block of flats, so I thought I’d teach him a lesson by putting a clamp on his tyre. I later went outside, and not only had he cut the clamp off, he’d left me a note basically saying, "Better luck next time, asshole." FML

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The final boss of annoying customers

Karen - 22/12/2023 06:00 - United States - Akron

Today, while I was helping customers in the self-checkout, one lady wouldn’t stop talking to me. Other customers needed help and I was trying to go help them. When I tried to walk away, she hugged me over my arms, physically restraining me. I froze. I actually have PTSD from being sexually assaulted years ago. FML

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AITA? Yes.

Anonymous - 20/12/2023 23:00 - United States

Today, after sharing my library app account with my sister for years, out of revenge for sleeping with her boyfriend, she removed the holds on all the books and audios I’ve been waiting months for. It could be half a year before I get any of them. FML

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Pick me

rob - 11/12/2023 15:00 - United States

Today, I live in an area and age where girls hang out with party promoters past their mid-20s, who have been texting them since they were in high school. Apparently, these men who get young girls intoxicated are not dangerous people. Yet, these same girls spew the same feminist crap on instagram. FML

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Ouroboros

History Repeating - 11/12/2023 15:00 - Switzerland

Today, I realized am THAT parent: I put a lot of pressure on my 8 year-old (!) daughter, because I hope she succeeds professionally and will have the self-confidence I lack. Why do I rather stay at home and lack self-confidence? Because my own mother put me under so much pressure and drowned me in her expectations. FML

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Stuck on amber

Jaled - 11/12/2023 09:00 - United States

Today, I got stuck in an elevator with a guy I have a bit of a crush on. Trying to break the awkward silence, I made a joke about our situation, saying, "Well, at least we're not on a desert island." He replied, "Yeah, but I'd still prefer the island; at least then I could escape." FML

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Mommy issues

Anonymous - 05/12/2023 17:00 - United States - Maryland Heights

Today, six years after I gave up my newborn to my sister to raise, I finally told him I’m his real mom. In response, my sister took out a restraining order against me and blocked all forms of contact. The entire family has sided with her. FML

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Thoughts and prayers

Anonymous - 03/12/2023 18:00 - United States - Dillingham

Today, I don't know what to do to be a good husband. In my wife's eyes, I can’t do anything right. I asked to have more quality time with her but she would rather play video games than spending time with me. I don’t know what to do. FML

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Tense

Lucia - 03/12/2023 16:00 - United States

Today, I found out my husband and I are banned from family gatherings, all because he was my sister’s ex-husband. They need to come to terms with #1, that was 2 years ago; #2 we’re obviously a better fit for one another. If he was "the One", he’d still be hers; #3 you can’t force someone to love you when they don’t. FML

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It's PC gone mad

Anonymous - 03/12/2023 13:00

Today, I received a written warning at work for being "unacceptably rude" to an official visitor. I guess fetching the fire hose because the building was actively on fire wasn’t a valid excuse for yelling at the dozy cow stood blocking the door to “move out the fucking way.” FML

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Ain't gonna end well

Anonymous - 02/12/2023 18:00 - United States - Wilmington

Today, my abusive mom just moved into my house, within two weeks of me losing my job. FML

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Obsessional

Jacklynn - 30/11/2023 10:00

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I don’t have a life outside of him. I don’t have any friends other than him, nor do I have any hobbies or interests; he’s the centre of my world. Apparently this makes me too available, needy, and codependent. FML

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Charming dude

Hurt as hell - 29/11/2023 07:30

Today, I saw the guy I have a crush on kissing a blonde chick. He'd turned me down because he “wasn’t into blondes”. I’m a blonde myself. When I confronted him about it, he told me, “Oh, I should have been more specific. I’m not into blondes who have a face like Sid the Sloth and a body like Shamu.” FML

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Entitled much?

grandpa - 27/11/2023 05:00

Today, despite being the first to hold all my other grandchildren, despite my son and bitch of a daughter-in-law agreeing I would be the first, I showed up at the hospital to see my daughter-in-law's father holding my grandchild before me. FML

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Humblebragging much?

Anonymous - 26/11/2023 16:00 - Sweden - Lidingoe

Today, I realized I have rejected at least five marriage offers and about the same number of women who've wanted to have my children. I have never been into kids or marriage, but all my girlfriends and some FWBs turn into marriage and kid crazy wannabe housewives after a while. FML

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I'm an empath

Anonymous - 25/11/2023 16:00

Today, after years of miscarriages and desperately wanting a child, I lost my temper and screamed at my sister after she announced she'd had an abortion last month. Now no one in the family will speak to me, since I referred to her adopted kids as, "Not really her children." FML

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The day of reckoning

ImFvcked - 24/11/2023 12:00

Today, I went to a friend’s Friendsgiving party with my girlfriend. When I got there, I saw my wife’s supervisor from her job. He recognized me, too. When I tried to save face saying my girlfriend was my sister, she got upset and corrected me. Way to throw me under the bus, babe. FML

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Advice wanted

Anonymous - 28/10/2023 06:00

Today, I feel underappreciated and unloved by my husband. I've tried to bring it up and show him my appreciation, but he responds with, "Well you haven't shown me appreciation or respect once in our relationship. If you feel that way that's on you." What do I do other than divorce? FML

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It was a different time…

jane - 21/10/2023 18:00

Today, my boyfriend logged onto his old Skype account from 2012 to nostalgically look back at some old gaming chats. He started bawling when he came across his now-deceased online friend’s profile and reminisced about the good times. The whole chat consisted of the ‘N word’ sent back and forth. FML

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, my son joined the ranks of an organisation filled with nothing but scum, villains, thieves, and highwaymen. He's now a tax inspector. FML

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Today, I was brutally tackled and detained by a group of people until the police arrived, because I fit the description of a wanted criminal who was featured on the news. This isn't the first time this has happened, and no style change I've tried has been able to avert it. FML

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Today, I'm currently 9 months pregnant with my second child within 3 years. I was told by 4 different doctors over the course of the past 5 years that I'm incapable of having kids, due to a medical condition that affects my reproductive system. FML

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Today, while at the mall, a lady dropped her credit card while in line to buy something. I came over, picked it up and gave it to her just for her to shove it in my hand and scream, "She's stealing my wallet! My wallet!" The police came. FML

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Today, I went to the arcade with my dad, and we decided to try out the hurricane simulator, which blasts 60mph air around in an enclosed space. My dad farted halfway through. FML

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Today, and for the past few days, there is a musical box stuck somewhere in my attic that randomly plays Christmas songs. FML

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