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I've been dying my hair since I was 14, so know what I'm doing. I just now live in a tiny house with a tiny bathroom and my hair is just shy of my butt. I usually use a mirror to make sure I'm ok, but because of the length of my hair I have to do it upside down over the bathtub. It got on my arms while doing the main body of my hair, ears and forehead are a no brainier and I had a couple of spots drip down the gloves while I was doing the ends. I managed to get it off my face thankfully because I had to go out in public. The box said to use a wet towel with shampoo on it when you rinse it out, which I did and it didn't seem to be working so I attacked my face with exfoliating gloves and it did the job. I've now got to work out how to scrub the purple off the vanity and in the bathtub. I do wipe it straight away but it stains right away too. It's a super dark mahogany since I have to use 2 bottles. Looks blackish in the shade and red in the sun. Came out far better than I expected and I've never gone dark before so it's a nice change. Adds to the 'new me' thing I've got going.

By fuckface? I wish - 30/11/2013 20:29 - Australia - Diamond Beach

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She asked if the ring was a temporary thing until I got a better one, saw my dumbfounded face, then played it off as a joke and said yes. I later found out she'd posted on Facebook bitching about the ring, but with the privacy setting set to hide it from me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 039

You deserved it 5 496

By Tuture - 30/04/2016 01:08 - France - Paris

Today, a learner driver was practicing maneuvers in the parking lot at work. This happens a lot, and my colleagues and I usually have fun watching and laughing. It was all fun and games as usual, until the learner crashed into my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 645

You deserved it 2 557

By f.m. - 23/07/2018 16:00

Today, I took my driving test. I was nervous, but I thought I followed the rules of the road pretty well. My tester ended up failing me for "backing out too slowly". FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 272

You deserved it 309

By Anonymous - 21/11/2013 22:30 - United States - Auburn

Today, my neighbor finally password-protected his wifi. Right in the middle of my timed, online exam. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 039

You deserved it 95 827

Power moves

By Travis - 10/09/2021 22:59

Today, my wife told me that I take her breath away. However, she was talking about my large stomach hitting her while we have sex and knocking the wind out of her with every thrust. FML

I agree, your life sucks 620

You deserved it 1 230

By pissedandpoor - 15/04/2016 17:50 - United States - Meadville

Today, my wallet got stolen. I had a bunch of cash, my SS card and my license in it. Now I have to replace everything, only to have to renew my license again when I turn 21 in June. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 005

You deserved it 2 967

What's in a name?

By charlatan - 19/08/2018 01:30

Today, I asked out the girl of my dreams. She asked me what year I was born in, then brutally rejected me. Apparently it's because my name wasn't in the top 20 baby names for my birth year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 994

You deserved it 231

Fitness guru

By Anonymous - 13/04/2016 16:41 - United States

Today, I joined my grandpa on his morning jog. I didn't last 15 minutes before nearly passing out from exhaustion. He came jogging back home nearly an hour later looking even better than he did when we left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 943

You deserved it 6 783

My precious baby

By Anonymous - 08/11/2013 23:02 - Canada - Calgary

Today, she did it again. While I was minding my own business reading the paper, she casually walked up to me and slashed my face with her nails, drawing blood and screams of pain. I need to get out of this abusive relationship, but no one will adopt my asshole of a cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 692

You deserved it 8 740

All in a day's work!

By Joshtodon - 21/08/2018 22:00

Today, I was unloading tile boxes out of my pickup truck into this lady's garage. As I grabbed the last 50-pound box, a passing bird shat on my forehead. Green ooze ran down my whole face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 823

You deserved it 172

By Betrayed - 31/07/2009 09:35 - United States

Today, my family took me to a wig store saying I wouldn't feel so insecure about being bald because of my chemo treatments. When I told them I accepted myself and didn't want a wig, they came out and told me THEY couldn't accept it. My own family is embarrassed of me over something I can't control. FML

I agree, your life sucks 102 254

You deserved it 4 021

By Drover7 - 07/04/2016 23:26 - Australia - Padstow

Today, my family is flying to Hawaii for a longed-for holiday. Well, my husband and children are; I'm in a hospital bed awaiting surgery on kidney stones that I never knew I had. Hopefully they'll send me a postcard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 941

You deserved it 1 213

Drover7 tells us more.

Drover7 3

Tuesday 12 April 2016 7:39

I am the OP and wish to thank everyone for their well wishes and kindness. Bit of an update: I have an infection in both kidneys so they can't yet remove the big 7mm stone that is stuck half way. Surgeons put in a stent and my pain filled hazy brain decided I just wanted to be with family so I stupidly boarded a plane to Hawaii! Now I am writhing about in a hotel bed (with a beautiful view of Waikiki and Diamond Head) and still ruining my family's holiday. I didn't realise how serious my condition was when I assured my husband that if he got on the plane I would follow a day later so it's all my fault. I've made a shitty situation even worse. FML

By jdawn99 - 22/10/2013 14:24 - United States - Arkansas City

Today, as a science teacher, I did a science experiment in front of a class. One of my students asked me if it was "photoshopped." He was being serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 653

You deserved it 3 216