The Top

It was advertised as an event for children. The guy running the event refused to pay for the professional princesses when they showed up, ready to perform. I think he intended on scamming everyone since he had the other slutty costumes on hand. The whole thing was a disaster! Police were called, parents were screaming obscenities and threats, etc. My local news station just finished running the story.

By BadassNinja - 05/09/2009 16:22 - United States

Today, I tried to impress my girlfriend by punching through a piece of old drywall karate kid-style. As it turns out, the drywall was actually a thin piece of concrete. I now have a busted hand and a girlfriend with a new story to tell all her friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 804

You deserved it 51 136

By lifesucks4me - 23/02/2009 12:51 - United States

Today, I'm playing basketball with my little brother. After jokingly blocking his shot, he turns to me and says, "You're a bitch." He's 6. After I asked him where he heard that word, he responded with, "Daddy calls you that when you're not around." FML

I agree, your life sucks 161 061

You deserved it 13 795

Thanks, Dad

By not picking up - 20/03/2015 17:50 - Slovenia - Zelimlje

Today, I took my girlfriend to meet my parents. My dad thought it'd be hilarious to act surprised and ask me if I'd already dumped the girlfriend I introduced him to yesterday. She slapped me and stormed out of the house before my dad could tell her it was a joke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 500

You deserved it 2 619

America! F*** yeah!

By scarredforlife - 08/08/2009 01:34 - United States

Today, it was my mom's birthday, I planned to wish her a happy birthday as she woke up. I opened the door to her room, only to see my dad dancing around in an American flag thong. Grimacing in pain, I closed the door right away. Not only am I forever disturbed, but now my dad is asking me how he looks naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 245

You deserved it 7 231

The betrayal!

By Jessica - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I found out that my best friend won $1,000 in a photography contest. Using a photo I took. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 476

You deserved it 3 118

Big deal

By Like mother like daughter - 24/02/2015 22:25 - United States - Aurora

Today, I had a talk with my daughter about how I hope her first boyfriend is a special one because 'spending the night' with a boy is a big deal. She replied with a giggle, "Mom, I lost my virginity in a parking lot three years ago!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 835

You deserved it 9 624

By Myballshurt - 03/08/2013 04:31 - United States - Harrisburg

Today, I learned a few things. One: friends are assholes. Two: under no circumstance do you close your eyes when they ask you to. Three: getting kicked in the balls hurts a lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 458

You deserved it 22 134

By Anonymous - 16/07/2013 00:10 - United States - Charlotte

Today, my 11-year-old daughter heard the quote, "If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, it's yours forever. If it doesn't, then it was never meant to be." She decided to test this out by letting our new puppy out of the front door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 858

You deserved it 4 896

By Rainbow_Rhinos - 28/11/2015 07:17 - Australia

Today, I realised there's a reason that no one talks to the weird guy from choir practice. I was nice to him a couple weeks ago and now he won't stop following me around the school and watching my group at lunch from behind a pole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 475

You deserved it 2 053

Rainbow_Rhinos tells us more.

Rainbow_Rhinos 23

Sunday 29 November 2015 14:11

OP here. My friends and I checked him out and he has a history of doing the same thing to girls in his own grade (he's a year below me). He bugs them online and invites himself into their lunch group, as well as watching from behind poles. He isn't very physically threatening, so no one sees him as a threat, but more of an annoyance. And very creepy. I'm not rude to him, but I don't want to encourage the behaviour so I just ignore it. When he comes over to our group we start talking loudly about bras or tampons and he wanders away soon enough.