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Time out

By Somebody kill me! - 02/05/2021 00:30

Today, after a year and a half of overexploitation at work without getting paid for it, I can finally have a deserved vacation. Why? I caught Covid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 000

You deserved it 155

Yikes

By AAAAAAAAAAAAA - 11/07/2022 14:00 - United States - Steele

Today, I heard a scream that sounded suspiciously like my cat when he's just had a nightmare or is otherwise in a state of extreme distress. I found him chilling on my couch, so I walked back to my room, when I heard the scream again. I ran back and he was still chilling. It was my neighbor's son screaming outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 770

You deserved it 152

I hardly know you

By Disgustedafffd - 02/11/2023 20:00

Today, I found out my husband’s obsession with Hentai. Dozens of pictures and videos of half-naked Japanese anime girls. The most horrifying thing was the fact that he’s actually in a sexual relationship with his secretary, who is a petite Asian girl. I’ve just given birth to our second child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 700

You deserved it 206

Cat fight

By Mishka - 04/05/2025 03:00 - United States

Today, we got a new kitten, and my older cat is not happy. I just learned that my fiance doesn't interfere when they fight. He says watching my old fat cat chase the kitten is the funniest thing he's seen all month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 199

You deserved it 446

The cat's out of the bag

By OldUglyWife - 18/07/2022 12:00

Today, I found out why my husband hasn’t invited me to his company’s summer social. Maybe, just maybe, he didn’t want me to know of the fling between him and his attractive young coworker. Her age is the same number of years we’ve been married, 19 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 564

You deserved it 142

Technically, that's stealing

By Elizabeth Ann - 04/10/2019 22:00

Today, I told my mom about the $50 I'd hidden in case of an emergency, and how I couldn't find it. She said she'd borrowed it last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 691

You deserved it 185

Double entendre

By Anonymous - 28/07/2022 00:01

Today, I walked out of my platonic coworker's office, after he got my lunch order wrong. My exit line? “Get your creamy pork sausage out of my taco.” The entire bullpen started hooting and hollering. FML

I agree, your life sucks 284

You deserved it 1 297

Reminder

By Anonymous - 21/11/2023 10:00 - Australia - Wacol

Today, I was running a D&D game. I invited my nephew to come along to try and distract him, as his brother took his life two weeks ago. Stupidly, I had only skimmed through the module I was running (as I run multiple) and didn't realise that today's session involved gallows. Guess how his brother took his life? FML

I agree, your life sucks 469

You deserved it 331

Tired of life

By sick as bro - 16/08/2022 22:00 - Australia

Today, I was diagnosed with my seventh chronic illness. My body and life are getting progressively more uncomfortable, painful, exhausting, and difficult. I'm starting to wish one of them was lethal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 224

You deserved it 124

Stop moving!

By Anonymous - 29/05/2025 12:00 - Australia

Today, I had to try and capture some of my dog’s pee to get tests done. During the attempt, he pissed all up my arm, the ordeal drawing a crowd of spectators who no doubt think I’ve gone mad. After all that, the sample captured wasn’t enough to be tested. FML

I agree, your life sucks 422

You deserved it 107

Alexa, play "All You Need is Hate" by The Delgados

By Heart broken daddy issues - 07/08/2022 04:00

Today, I learned for the first time it's possible to love your children, but not to like them at all. I learned this from my own dad, who told me he will always love me, but he never really liked me much, so now that I've moved out, he doesn't see much reason for us to see each other anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 995

You deserved it 142

Musical exploration

By Anonymous - 30/11/2023 07:30

Today, after I tried to create the perfect playlist for a road trip, my music app decided to shuffle exclusively between sea shanties and children's nursery rhymes, turning my drive into a surreal musical adventure that left me questioning the algorithm's sense of humor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 399

You deserved it 207

Damage control

By Anonymous - 11/08/2022 00:00

Today, I overloaded the washing machine and it flooded the downstairs. The flooring will have to be scrapped and drywall replaced. It's 100% my fault. Did I mention this is not my house? FML

I agree, your life sucks 328

You deserved it 1 184

Easy on the Chardonnay

By Anonymous - 11/06/2025 20:00 - United States

Today, I gave a speech at my best friend’s wedding. I wanted to say, “You both look beautiful together.” Instead, nerves took over, and I blurted out, “You both look beautiful naked.” In front of 100 people. And a priest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 201

You deserved it 394

Healthcare is broken

By Anonymous - 27/08/2022 14:00 - United Kingdom - Sheffield

Today, my dad was finally referred for urgent spinal surgery. He's had increasingly bad neurological problems for over a year, and they have been ignoring my pleas for help, until it's urgent enough that they are operating next week. No one will give us a survival rate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 972

You deserved it 110

How does this keep happening?

By Paul - 14/06/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, I meant to forward an email to my coworker with the message “Can you believe this crap?” referring to our client’s request. Instead, I hit “Reply All.” The client responded: “Yes, I can believe it. And I expect it done by Friday.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 76

You deserved it 707

Careless words

By Kilamo - 16/06/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, after burying my dad on my birthday, one of my aunts walked up to me and said, "Well at least you won't forget your birthday." I wanted to cuss her out so bad, like, bitch, how would I forget my birthday and the day I buried my dad? FML

I agree, your life sucks 522

You deserved it 80

Signals

By UnfortunatelyNotPsychic - 20/12/2023 20:00 - United Kingdom - Darlington

Today, my partner said I was ''foreign'' to him, like ''I didn't know him at all'' when I failed to correctly pick up on a highly specific thought he had about me, via text message. Sorry for not being psychic, babe? FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 125

The final boss of annoying customers

By Karen - 22/12/2023 12:00 - United States - Akron

Today, while I was helping customers in the self-checkout, one lady wouldn’t stop talking to me. Other customers needed help and I was trying to go help them. When I tried to walk away, she hugged me over my arms, physically restraining me. I froze. I actually have PTSD from being sexually assaulted years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 706

You deserved it 128

Sleep well?

By Karen - 29/08/2022 16:00

Today, there was a wasp tangled in my bed sheets. I found this out when I rolled over it in my sleep, and it stung me on the lower back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 950

You deserved it 76

Cheeky dog

By onefmlafteranother - 15/11/2019 01:00

Today, I was laying my head on my dad's dog when he walked in. I jokingly asked my dad, "I'm cuddling with your dog, are you jealous?" At that same moment, the dog lets a massive, earth-quaking fart loose, and my dad promptly responded, "Nope!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 705

You deserved it 593

The joys of mp3

By Anonymous - 01/09/2022 14:00

Today, I opened my music app like always. All my tracks' titles had been reset. Now they’re called either (lyrics) or ‘’ ? () [] - symbols. I have nearly 2000 tracks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 956

You deserved it 125

No need for a reason

By Anonymous - 27/06/2021 04:01

Today, as I was bent over drying my legs after a shower, my girlfriend snuck behind me and pulled a hair off my ballsack for absolutely no good reason. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 018

You deserved it 228

Summer's here and the time is right…

By Anonymous - 26/06/2021 18:30

Today, I was on my way to work and wearing a tank top when I suddenly walked through 10 feet of sprinklers and got completely soaked. A cop flagged me down in front of a bunch of people, because apparently I matched the description of a "suspect". He stared at my boobs the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 977

You deserved it 183

Back to square one

By Anonymous - 10/07/2025 00:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I created a 3D sculpture for a competition that I was hoping might impress some people, and maybe lead to a job with a particular company. I finished it last night for the competition, but this morning I realised it’s too big to get it out of my front door without taking it apart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 313

You deserved it 278

Sabotage

By Anonymous - 09/01/2024 00:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that my ex tries to ruin my dates, and constantly asks our friend about me and why I don’t talk to her. She broke up with me over text because of the distance between us, after ghosting me for two weeks. We both knew that it would be a long-distance relationship due to her going to uni. FML

I agree, your life sucks 515

You deserved it 108

Sprain in the ass

By Anonymous - 04/07/2021 16:02

Today, after two months of recovering from a sprained ankle, the doctor told me I was fully healed. On the way to my car from the doctor's, I stepped on some leaves, which were covering a small hole. A hole big enough for me to trip on and give me another sprained ankle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 026

You deserved it 127

Irritable

By majestic09 - 15/01/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, like most days, no matter what I eat, my stomach does not agree. FML

I agree, your life sucks 472

You deserved it 110

Yay!

By Anonymous - 21/07/2025 00:00 - Germany

Today, I got out of work, and just wanted to relax after a stressful day. Instead, I came home to a surprise birthday party that my boyfriend set up. My birthday isn't even until next week, and I secretly hate two of the people he invited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 425

You deserved it 218

Mind your own business, Cheryl

By A different illness - 21/09/2022 03:30 - United States

Today, I was harshly scolded by a woman who claimed I "can't get over the Covid hysteria" because I was wearing a mask outside in public. I wear a mask whenever I'm outside because of seasonal allergies, and I have not caught Covid since November 2020. FML

I agree, your life sucks 869

You deserved it 198

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The Top

Today, I woke up to my dog laying on the pillow next to me. When he saw that I was awake, he wagged his tail happily and then promptly sneezed in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 550

You deserved it 3 247

Today, I fractured a bone in my knee. Now not only do I have to wear a huge knee brace for the next two months, I'll have to sit around in a hotel room all of next week while my family has fun skiing in the mountains. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 317

You deserved it 2 665

Today, MS Word kept crashing with a memory error, so I called tech support. Instead of actually fixing the problem, their tech wasted over an hour of my time defragmenting the hard drive, disabling the anti-virus, and downloading new video card drivers from some shady site, before giving up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 216

You deserved it 3 352

Today, my daughter-in-law revealed to me that she caught my husband having an affair with her best friend. This was five years ago, and she is only telling me now because he stopped paying her the blackmail money to keep her mouth shut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 673

You deserved it 2 803

Today, I kissed my girlfriend and she tasted like a cigarette. I don't smoke. She doesn't smoke. My roommate does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 545

You deserved it 3 497

Today, I dreamt my fiancé was rolling frozen potatoes onto my bed to wake me up. In reality I woke up screaming to intense cramps in my legs which almost reduced me to tears. I could barely walk for two hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 249

You deserved it 248