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This little story actually happened a little while ago, I had to use the "Today" form because of the page's standard, but at least I can tell you how it ends. I moved into the flat when I was barely 19, while the flatmate-stalker (also nicknamed The 28 Years Old Virgin) was seven years older than me. He started to be obsessed with me after we went to the cinema together (the other two flatmates were supposed to come with us but they didn't), and he got convinced we were on a date. I didn't move out because at the time I was quite naive and I was getting together well with everyone else, plus the flat was really close to my uni and relatively cheap, and I thought that he was about to graduate anyway. His parents, for the records, are creepier than him: his dad came to visit once and my roommate caught him opening our wardrobe and going through our clothes, about a month before this episode. After graduation he had to move out because his mum wasn't willing to pay for the rent anymore and found him a job (he wanted to stay a bit longer but fortunately didn't happen), and came to visit unannounced a few times. About one year after he sent me a text out of nowhere (I didn't speak with him for months) saying that it was over and he was sorry if he did something to make me want to break up with him, so I guess that at that point after imagining us dating and getting together I probably left him. I hear he's doing fine and got his first girlfriend.

By Awkward - 19/07/2012 02:15 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I sat awkwardly and pretended like I didn't notice my cousin discreetly trying to masturbate while talking to me. This isn't the first time anything like this has happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 981

You deserved it 3 876

By SatelliteUser - 03/12/2009 20:13 - United States

Today, I called my wife to tell her I finally found a job after 6 months. A man answered the phone claiming to be the cable guy. We cut our cable off when I was laid off 6 months ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 842

You deserved it 2 593

By lk07 - 23/04/2019 18:00 - United States - Richmond

Today, I'm stuck in bed with a fever, aches, and nasty cough. My kids and husband had it too, and kept coughing without covering their mouths, despite my asking several times so I wouldn't get sick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 083

You deserved it 404

By Anonyme - 10/01/2011 06:29 - Gabonese Republic

Today, my economics teacher gives us a lot of photocopies, so I told her that she kills pandas by wasting so much paper. One of the girls in my class said, “No way! They use pandas to make paper?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 669

You deserved it 110

By noname - 07/11/2010 04:04 - Canada

Today, I was mad at my mother. Why? We went to parent-teacher interviews, and she told my math teacher that she should allow bathroom breaks because I have a "very heavy menstrual flow." My teacher suggested I eat more red meat. They got into a seven-minute argument about this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 173

You deserved it 2 807

By lpilou - 01/03/2008 04:33 - France

Today, I finally get to know the girl from my college that I've been into for months. The conversation is pleasant. We live in the same neighborhood. I say that the restaurant I live above is really disgusting. Turns out it belongs to her parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 597

You deserved it 175

By sydspears3 - 09/09/2014 18:08 - United States - Tampa

Today, I found out I sent several embarrassing videos while under the influence of the meds I was given while getting my wisdom teeth out. When I asked my mom why she didn't take my phone, she said she tried but I started whining and growling at her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 882

You deserved it 6 750

sydspears3 tells us more.

sydspears3 17

Wednesday 10 September 2014 0:42

To answers some questions and requests- 1) yes I did post one of the videos to my YouTube channel which I will provide a link to 2) Moms do not ruin life, they make it possible 3) In my moms defense I never told her take take my phone but I just thought she would have thought to when she saw me snapchating people 4) The I didn't give my mom my phone is because we didn't think they would effect me so much since they didn't really effect my 3 older siblings when they got their out. 5) Sorry for the long follow up but here's the link to video https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=jaOEDYDInZ4 Or just search my YouTube channel Sydspears3

By candie - 27/08/2011 02:10 - United States

Today, thanks to my wife's confession, I found out that the 14 year old child I've raised since I was 16 isn't related to me at all. But at least this narrows the real father down to one of three other guys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 634

You deserved it 4 314