The Top

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By Anonymous - 12/11/2013 19:12 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend's ex moved into the apartment beneath us. She's already called the cops on us for a noise complaint twice. We were sleeping. It's going to be a long year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 597

You deserved it 2 770

By ceilingssuck - 17/02/2010 20:18 - New Zealand

Today, I noticed that my ceiling was sagging slightly. I got up on to a chair to look at it more closely, and I touched it. Turns out that my ceiling was full of water. It went everywhere, ruining my new iPod, phone, and all the things my daughter bought for university. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 874

You deserved it 4 935

Party pooper

By Uninvited - 05/12/2022 18:00

Today, I found out about my husband’s work Holiday party last night. I wasn’t invited because he told me they didn’t allow plus ones. That would be more believable if my friend who works at his same company hadn’t brought his wife there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 989

You deserved it 136

Dominatrix

By Grudges - 01/11/2025 20:00

Today, I found an odd notebook in my wife's desk and opened it. I learned why our sex life has gotten so boring: every time I upset her, she secretly bans something sexual. For instance: "June 16th - dented car - no more lingerie" or "August 9th - forgot wallet on date night - no more rope play." FML

I agree, your life sucks 382

You deserved it 147

By kise - 28/11/2012 06:20 - France - Paris

Today, drunk at a party, I leaned through a window to throw up. I was outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 349

You deserved it 221

Thanks Mom

By Anonymous - 09/12/2022 00:00 - United States

Today, I don't know which is worse: my brother cramming all his sauce bottles into a fridge door shelf that exploded onto the floor when I opened the fridge, or my mother being mad at me because I was upset about slicing open my finger while cleaning up the broken glass and my hand now burns. FML

I agree, your life sucks 861

You deserved it 136

By Peter - 27/12/2011 02:24 - United States

Today, we found out where our daughter had been hiding her crayons. We also found out why our stereo stopped working. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 569

You deserved it 3 003

By Anonymous - 01/08/2009 12:56 - United States

Today, I went to the mall and saw a really cute guy. I acted all cool and started doing a sexy hair flip. On the way back up from my hair flip I hit my head on a cellphone stand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 073

You deserved it 58 950

By insearch4i - 22/01/2009 15:14 - United States

Today, I got bored and decided to try World Of Warcraft. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 875

You deserved it 31 188

Never cheap out on trash bags

By Trash Fail - 21/12/2022 00:00

Today, I tried to replace my garbage can's trash bag. Every time I tried to pick it up, it would rip. Now my only option is to physically take everything out of it and pray to the Gods of Garbage that I get a trash can that doesn't have the durability of 1-ply toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 616

You deserved it 239

Scavengers

By Anonymous - 25/12/2011 17:07 - United States

Today, I couldn't find my phone. Worried that I'd accidentally thrown it in the trash, I emptied out all the bins and searched the garbage. An hour later, my daughter said she'd found it by the bathroom sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 014

You deserved it 26 807

Not quite ready for the Winter Olympics

By Floof - 15/02/2010 13:35 - United States

Today, I was skiing in Vermont for the third day straight. Since I was getting very little sleep, on the top of the chairlift I let out a huge yawn, pulling a muscle in my face. As I slid down the ramp, everyone saw me thrashing my head around and making funny, painful faces as I fell down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 592

You deserved it 4 901

THIS DOESN'T FEEL NICE

By Krey85 - 12/12/2022 00:00 - United States - Portland

Today, I had lower lumbar back surgery. I'm in horrible pain, my kids are wedged up my butt even though my husband is home, and I've heard nothing from friends or family, not even a check-in to see how it went. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 170

You deserved it 170

By Username - 18/02/2011 05:19

Today, I came home to a lease violation and a $220 fine after a routine pest control visit. The violation: my single beta fish in a small bowl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 489

You deserved it 4 984

By Kika - 20/01/2009 07:59 - France

Today, the phone rang. I run to get the call, I trip, fall on a metal chair. Tears in my eyes and out of breath I pick up... "Hi, do you have a minute to answer a few questions? It's for a survey." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 033

You deserved it 4 614

New creepypasta just dropped

By Anonymous - 21/12/2022 03:00 - Australia

Today, I was sick in bed with a nasty flu. It was also the day my bird was eaten by an animal that had silently burrowed into the cage while I was recovering. FML

I agree, your life sucks 936

You deserved it 141

Me, myself, and I

By Anonymous - 29/04/2024 14:00 - United States - DeWitt

Today, I was tempted into clicking a shady link with the promise of free MP3s of De La Soul’s first four albums, with all the original samples. Long story short, I had to do a system restore on my laptop. Now it won’t play audio files for some inexplicable reason. FML

I agree, your life sucks 88

You deserved it 803

And you did it at my birthday dinner

By Anonymous - 10/11/2025 12:00

Today, as a makeup influencer, I came home to find my entire makeup collection destroyed. She dumped, stomped, and covered it all in used kitty litter for good measure. My obsessively jealous girlfriend swore I was dressing up for another woman. My collection was worth over $1800. FML

I agree, your life sucks 429

You deserved it 236

HELP!

By CandyMachine - 16/02/2011 23:58 - United States

Today, I went to the vending machine, put in a dollar, and reached down to grab my snack. The slot door wouldn't open, so I pushed it harder. I got my hand in, but the door got stuck again, this time with my hand inside. I tried to push with my other hand. It got stuck too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 839

You deserved it 9 849

By GopherJR - 19/01/2009 01:07 - Canada

Today, I convinced myself I needed to get over my ex-girlfriend. I spent twenty minutes signing up for a new dating site, only to find out, that the only other profile on the site of a person within 200 km, is my ex-girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 886

You deserved it 2 424

Rabies ain't no joke

By No good deed... - 02/05/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, a coyote turned up in the yard where my son and his friend were playing. It was aggressive and foaming at the mouth, so I called the boys inside, and shot it. Now my wife is scared of me and half the neighborhood wants me gone for "dangerous behavior." FML

I agree, your life sucks 706

You deserved it 152

Bad day, huh?

By Anonymous - 12/11/2025 22:00

Today, work was exhausting, so I decided to get a pretzel crust pizza from Little Caesars on the way home. When I got home and opened the box, not only was the pizza cooked rather poorly, but there was also a mountain of salt strewn all over it, EXCEPT for the crust. How do you even mess up that badly? FML

I agree, your life sucks 369

You deserved it 80

Get me out

By bosslady12 - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I realized that I needed a new job when I had to take anti-anxiety medication before meeting with my boss. Last time we met, I had a panic attack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 551

You deserved it 3 406

By xetsa - 13/02/2010 05:23 - France

Today, I realized for the last year that my husband has been home from Iraq, I haven't gotten more than a few hours of sleep at night. Not because he gets nightmares, but because he now snores so loud that the pets sleep at the other end of the house to get rest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 748

You deserved it 3 237

Lost

By Anonymous - 15/11/2025 09:00

Today, at a fancy restaurant, I walked into the restroom. After washing my hands, I looked up and noticed the urinals and the sudden presence of three very confused men. I had walked into the men’s bathroom. I pretended to check my phone like I was lost. FML

I agree, your life sucks 121

You deserved it 362

This charming man

By NoAlibi - 06/05/2024 12:00 - United States

Today, I learned that it’s unwise to ask my cheating boyfriend, “What does she have that I don’t?” I was reduced to tears when he told me every single detail this new girl has that makes her so amazing. Now I’m researching plastic surgery and tummy tuck websites. FML

I agree, your life sucks 636

You deserved it 345

Happy birthday indeed

By Anonymous - 17/11/2025 15:00

Today, it was my birthday. I had an appointment at the dentist and went to do some shopping after that. A while after I got home, I met my dad and he just started complaining that I didn't spend any time with them on my birthday. When I tried to explain to him, he just got angry at me and started yelling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 357

You deserved it 68

By joe - 19/11/2012 03:13 - United States - Ellicott City

Today, I bought a new armband to hold my iPhone while working out so I can listen to music and I was excited to start getting in shape. Unfortunately, when I tried it on, my arm was too big and it didn't fit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 041

You deserved it 7 012

iPhone 8? So bougie.

By PoorAfMan - 03/10/2021 17:00

Today, my friend who doesn’t pay bills, still lives at her parent’s rent free, and hasn't finished her Associate’s is debating what color she should order her iPhone 13 in. Meanwhile, I have a Master’s, pay an astronomical amount in mortgage and bills, and still have the iPhone 8. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 040

You deserved it 375

Lockdown throwback!

By Let it bleed - 09/05/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, my brother is staying over for a while. I thought I was prepared for this, but I totally forgot that he is inexplicably prone to having random nosebleeds. He's going through my Kleenex faster than a horny teenage boy left alone in his room. Time to hoard Kleenex like how people hoarded toilet paper in 2020. FML

I agree, your life sucks 399

You deserved it 103

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The Top

Today, I got my laptop back after lending it to my friend. It wouldn't boot, and after investigating I found out it'd been stripped of its hard drive and all its memory. When I confronted my "friend", he accused me of lying and trying to ruin his reputation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 486

You deserved it 2 596

Today, my life is so boring that I started looking through my can of coins and sorting them out by year. The oldest coin I have is from 1963. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 844

You deserved it 8 968

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents. My dad looked at him and said, "Nice outfit, but it's a little late for Halloween." Before I could intervene, my boyfriend said that joke had been done to death, to which my dad retorted, "Yeah, so has your mum." Instant fistfight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 004

You deserved it 3 484

Today, while working the drive-through at McDonald's, I was handing a gentleman his vanilla shake. He responded by popping the cap off, yelling "Fire in the hole!" and throwing it back in. He then quickly drove off. I was covered in vanilla shake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 299

You deserved it 5 255

Today, after I'd bought a daily planner to write down my plans and my accomplishments for this year, we're now in March and it’s completely empty. I realized that I have no goal, no plans, nothing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 754

You deserved it 299

Today, I went on a date and ended up back at her place. She gave me head in the front hall before we started moving to her bedroom. That’s when her dad, asleep on the sofa, woke up. She had no idea why he was there but she still had my stuff dripping down her chin, and he definitely noticed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 298

You deserved it 126