When you're too cute to look angry By Lewis - 31/01/2019 19:00 RESPECT MY AUTHORITHAY!!! I agree, your life sucks 1 247 You deserved it 829 Share Tweet Share
Today, I was trying to take the cap off a can of spray cooking oil. It was really stuck so I pulled extra hard. It flew off and I punched myself in the head. I also sprayed myself in the eye with it. The lump on my forehead and my swollen shut eye make me look like Popeye, but I'm a girl. FML I agree, your life sucks 24 117 You deserved it 5 371
Today, I went to my local Walmart to grab a few groceries, and while at the checkout line I grabbed two chocolate bars for a snack. The cashier gave me a look and mumbled under her breath, "Surprise, surprise." I'm pregnant, asshole. FML I agree, your life sucks 33 466 You deserved it 5 117
Today, I was on a chat site and a couple of cute guys asked for my "ASL". I had no idea what that meant so I asked one of my cousins. He said it meant "asshole" and that they were calling me an asshole. So I cursed at everyone who was actually asking for my "age, sex and location." FML I agree, your life sucks 322 You deserved it 1 234
Today, my roommate placed something on a shelf I put up, and the whole thing came crashing down. It's been fine for 2 years and now the shelf decides to break? Yeah right, dude. FML I agree, your life sucks 804 You deserved it 114
Today, I received a text from my girlfriend's female best friend that they have been dating for the last month. This was the week of our one year anniversary, and my birthday. We just moved into a duplex with my name on the lease. FML I agree, your life sucks 4 186 You deserved it 328
Today, I woke up from a dream in which I had a penis. Apparently I talk in my sleep, because my boyfriend kept staring at my crotch. FML I agree, your life sucks 34 939 You deserved it 5 026
AAAAAAAAHHHHH ✊ *cling*
What did that bell do to you? 😊