Miscellaneous: Today, I woke up with my face sharpied. I live alone. FML

By Funnymann - 22/01/2010 20:51 - United States

Today, I woke up with my face sharpied. I live alone. FML

agreeclassic 46 437

vote type 1 3 907

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By Anonymous - 20/10/2016 13:17 - United Kingdom - Maidstone

Today, I woke up to find my face covered in scratches, some of them bleeding. I was rather puzzled, as I don't have a cat. Then I realised that the feathers in my pillow had stuck out and scratched my face. I was attacked by my own pillow. FML

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By Amy - 10/05/2012 19:14 - Canada - Prince George

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By argh - 20/03/2012 08:16 - United States - Houston

Today, I woke up to the faint memory of being drunk enough to draw dicks on my own face in permanent marker. FML

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By permanently scarred - 25/08/2018 15:00

Today, I was assaulted and knocked out by a girl at school for talking to her boyfriend. I woke up in the emergency room. After she knocked me unconscious, she took a knife and carved her initials into my face. FML

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By Girl-of-very-little-brain - 29/12/2011 12:01 - Canada

Today, I woke up at midnight crying, stood up to turn on the lights and face-planted into my wall. FML

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By Anonymous - 13/05/2009 20:15 - Canada

Today, I woke up after a night of partying and went to the bathroom. That’s when I realized that after passing out with my shoes on last night, my friends decided use a black sharpie and play “connect the dots” with my acne. FML

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By Bonk - 04/02/2024 08:00 - United States

Today, my clumsiness reached a whole level when I hit myself in the face with a hammer hard enough for blood to come out. FML

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By HomeAlone - 24/04/2016 04:45 - United States

Today, I went into the bathroom and got angry upon finding that once again, no one had bothered to put on a new roll of toilet paper. And then I remembered that I live alone. FML

agreeclassic 9 884

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By Hayleey_079 - 18/02/2010 14:22 - United Kingdom

Today, a picture fell off of the wall in the middle of the night. It hit me smack bang in the middle of face. FML

agreeclassic 26 056

vote type 1 3 770

luvuall 0

Friday 22 January 2010 23:15

It was Jigglypuff

susieKiute 0

Friday 22 January 2010 23:09

paranormal activity?

Comments

jimmyjim13 5

Monday 26 September 2011 0:03

Jiggly puff strikes again

mariahzzzbaby 2

Sunday 2 October 2011 20:06

ya wow I would tottally move out

Kleric 0

Monday 21 November 2011 13:37

Hide yo kids, hide yo wife

sorrowevicteon 9

Monday 2 January 2012 5:40

That's f***ed up.

Nokken13 0

Friday 17 February 2012 4:20

not anymore

Lulicah 3

Tuesday 27 March 2012 5:24

Or do you...*insert Twilight Zone theme here*

cierraashlee 5

Wednesday 18 April 2012 23:00

You must have a sleeping disorder.

courtneyschrader 0

Friday 18 May 2012 0:32

That's scary. Lol

mustasho 0

Saturday 2 June 2012 19:41

Thats halarius xD

shamrocksread 2

Tuesday 26 June 2012 0:13

U probably did it to yourself and cant remember. Or u have some weird sleeping habits o_O

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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