Animals Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it...

halliemarie1818 - 24/04/2013 02:01 - United States

Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML

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Carnival of Disasters
Dive into carnival, where hilarious costumes meet unexpected mishaps. Laughter is guaranteed, mask or no mask! …

vetstudentdream - 15/04/2017 22:00 - Australia - Bellbowrie

Today, I found out what it feels like to have a cow take a large, flatulent shit with my arm still elbow-deep inside their rectum. FML

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anonymous - 17/07/2013 04:48 - United States - Katy

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

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Anonymous - 02/03/2016 05:06 - United States - Miami

Today, at work, man who was buying medicine for his son came up to me for help. He didn't know how to explain it to me, so instead he showed me a picture of a rash on his kid's butthole. FML

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abi_vet_student - 13/02/2009 12:42 - United Kingdom

Today, it was my first day working at a milking parlor. As I crouched behind a cow to put on an udder cluster, I looked up and gasped just in time for the cow to crap on my face. FML

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I love the countryside

disturbed - 01/06/2014 01:53 - Ireland

Today, I was hit in the face by the placenta of a cow that had just given birth. FML

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Vitani_Verci - 15/01/2016 06:57

Today, one of the kids at the daycare center I work at was so excited at the fact that his constipation was over, he felt the need to bring me his fecal matter, in his hands, to show me. Guess who had to clean up the aftermath. FML

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Surprise!

ilana - 10/02/2012 09:51 - United States

Today, I was working at my day-camp, and one of my little boys told me he had to show me something important. He proudly showed me that he'd crapped his pants. I had to wipe his ass clean. FML

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Ever Given

Anonymous - 31/03/2021 20:00 - United States - Elverson

Today, I had to poop, but as I sat down, it wouldn't come out. After about 10 minutes I realized I needed help. The only help I could get was my mother, who couldn't stop laughing at the sweat and faces I made. I still hurt. FML

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Anonymous - 20/04/2011 07:27 - South Africa

Today, I'm a student vet. Part of my holiday work is to gain experience working at a dairy. A cow came on to the platform for me to inject her udder. As I was bent over, she decided to take a dump. Onto my left eyeball. FML

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poomaster - 22/11/2010 02:33 - United States

Today, I spent an hour at work trying to make a tortoise poo. When he finally did, I was so excited and felt pretty triumphant. Then I realized that my job was to make animals drop their load. FML

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iLike2Teabag 27

Wednesday 24 April 2013 11:10

You out that cow through a lot. Talk about tearing it a new one...

Jakeymd 9

Wednesday 24 April 2013 11:11

No one deserves to experience that. FYL (was it like opening a can of coke that had been shook?)

drewbugg 5

Friday 26 April 2013 5:19

Ive spent 10 mins laughing at this!

lucky_611 3

Friday 26 April 2013 7:28

That has happen before on my farm as well. I felt so bad for the little guy, but at the same time it was so gross.

howsitgoingjc 2

Friday 26 April 2013 7:53

This is a straight up FML. This story is what this site was made for

SammiixSue 13

Friday 26 April 2013 17:50

That poor calf!

rooneygirl420 13

Friday 26 April 2013 22:19

Aww poor calf!

beklyon 7

Friday 26 April 2013 22:39

Poor baby! I agree with what the others have said - although you were just doing your job I consider you a hero for saving the poor calf's life. I'm so glad (s)he had you there to notice this and help out!