Intimacy, Tattoos Health New kink unlocked

New kink unlocked

sausages - 17/01/2014 20:56 - Macedonia - Skopje

Today, I went to get my first tattoo. Before we started, the tattooist told me to just relax and embrace the pain. I guess I did that too well; I kept getting an erection throughout. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

For life

thats_not_good - 28/05/2009 18:15 - United States

Today, I was getting my first tattoo done. My parents told me it was a bad idea. My friends' parents told me it was a bad idea. I told them that people get tattoos done all the time and nothing goes wrong. Fifty minutes into the tattoo on my back, the artist said, "Oh shit, shit, shit. We can fix this." FML

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UnluckyInk - 18/02/2013 08:50 - United States - Manlius

Today, I went in to get my first tattoo. I'd put a lot of thought into it and was really excited when the day came. Long story short, the Celtic knot I'd gotten turned out to have an alternate meaning of "female sex slave." The faces my very Irish family made were beyond words. FML

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Spooked

thatescalatedquickly - 07/11/2013 08:52 - United States - Collierville

Today, I was having sex for the first time with a girl who wanted to be friends with benefits. Halfway through sex she noticed that I had the same tattoo as her brother, and had a full-on panic attack that lasted half-an-hour. FML

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Anonymous - 08/01/2010 11:48 - United States

Today, I woke up and felt that my arm was sore. I got so drunk last night, I got an unprofessional tattoo of a penis. FML

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Buggga - 22/08/2009 09:07 - Australia

Today, I was instructed to shave my back in preperation for my first tattoo. I'm a girl. FML

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Anonymous - 17/04/2009 14:14 - United States

Today, I had to re-take an hour long MRI scan because I got an erection midway through. FML

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Inked

damnit - - Australia

Today, I got my first tattoo. It's a large broadsword which runs the length of my spine. I went home to show it off, only to learn that the hilt on my neck looks just like a penis when the rest of it is covered with my shirt. FML

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anon - 08/03/2009 08:47 - United States

Today, I got my first tattoo. It was a surprise for my fiancé: our names together over a heart. I went home but before I could show him, he said we had to have a "talk." So now my ex's name is tattooed on my back. The kicker? Turns out I'm allergic to the ink. FML

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Memento

Anonymous - 20/06/2023 03:00

Today, my quite squeamish girlfriend came with me to get my latest tattoo. She saw a few drops of blood, screamed in the tattooist's ear, and completely fucked up part of the outline. She had to alter the tattoo drastically to cover up the mess and now it just looks bad. FML

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Anonymous - 16/01/2011 10:48 - Canada

Today, I went to get a tattoo of my girlfriend's name to surprise her. Halfway through the tattooing, she called and broke up with me. FML

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anonymous_kenie 7

Saturday 18 January 2014 1:38

Hey sometimes life is hard

bloodierframe30 16

Saturday 18 January 2014 1:38

Wow. I'll call that a 'Hard' time

infectedsense 15

Saturday 18 January 2014 11:36

I'm positive that adrenaline can cause erections. This doesn't mean OP was actually aroused by the experience, he was just nervous/excited.

antonia789 17

Saturday 18 January 2014 11:57

Well atleast it didn't hurt

dquirke 7

Saturday 18 January 2014 14:41

I'm a girl but it affects me the same way XD

lailaxjan 11

Saturday 18 January 2014 17:24

Now you know the secret as to why tattoos are really so addictive!

DeeTrain420 11

Saturday 18 January 2014 18:02

freak!!

tje125 9

Saturday 18 January 2014 19:42

You must really like tattoos

m4green 3

Saturday 18 January 2014 20:43

Sometimes life can be a boner

stitesy29 18

Sunday 19 January 2014 0:34

You'd make a great Krasian warrior

sgballer 1

Sunday 19 January 2014 6:38

Warded Man reference ftw.

ctchan2381 5

Sunday 19 January 2014 2:43

I spotted the M

chellovesher 6

Sunday 19 January 2014 5:58

Don't worry, when I get tattooed I absolutely love it, that sh*t turns me on lol, I got my 7th tattoo on Friday. :p

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Love Coworkers Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, my dog has a better social life than I do. He has more playdates scheduled than I have actual human plans this month. I'm officially my dog's social secretary. FML

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Today, while reading in the bath, I accidentally switched the shower on. Not wanting my book to get soaked, I threw it out of the tub. When I got out of the tub later, I found it had landed squarely in the toilet. FML

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Today, I stumbled upon my boyfriend's Facebook. His second Facebook. On which I also stumbled upon his second girlfriend. FML

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Today, my hamster died. It climbed out of its cage and jumped off my dresser. Looking for condolences, I told my mom who replied, "If I lived in your room, I would have done it earlier." FML

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Today, I can no longer talk to my best friend thanks to his insecure, overbearing girlfriend of 3 months. We never talk about anything that crosses boundaries, and it's actually him who initiates the conversations. She’s forced him to block my number and social media accounts. FML

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Today, I took my cat to the vet for a routine check-up. The vet asked if my cat was stressed at all, so I confidently replied, "No, he's a pretty chill little dude." That's when my cat decided to hiss and spit his way to the top of the shelves on the other side of the examination room. He's not as chill as I thought. FML

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