Sex, Music Intimacy DJ Perfectionist

DJ Perfectionist

ImOverHere - 02/09/2012 16:56 - United States - Whitehouse

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend with candles and a sexy outfit. When he came in, he insisted that we needed music to help set the mood. Thirty minutes later, he's still searching for a song. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Hi Honey, I'm home

seminole711 - 20/09/2009 14:17 - United States

Today, I put my sexiest lingerie on, lit candles, put some sensual music on, and got my bed ready to surprise my boyfriend when he came home. I positioned myself in the sexiest pose possible. He came home and didn't come in my room for twenty minutes because of a football game. FML

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The best laid plans…

Anonymous - 03/02/2023 18:00

Today, I decided to surprise my girlfriend by cooking her dinner. I spent hours preparing and making sure everything was perfect. I lit candles, set the table, and even put on some soft music. When she came home, she'd already eaten and wasn't hungry. FML

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Anonymous - 08/01/2011 20:15 - Netherlands

Today, I called my boyfriend for a romantic night at home. I put on my hottest little dress, dimmed the lights, and put music on. My boyfriend stumbled in much later, drunk, and took one look at me before throwing up on my feet. FML

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Dirty talk

Anonymous - 05/12/2010 06:57 - United States

Today, I felt like spicing up our marriage, so I thought I'd surprise my husband when he got home from work. I put on my sexiest teddy, lit some candles, and laid on the bed. He walked in the room, looked at me for a second, farted, then asked me what was for dinner. FML

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nnnaaazzz - 24/10/2009 12:20 - United Kingdom

Today, I decided to pay a suprise visit to my boyfriend's house. I let myself in, walked up to his bedroom and found him dancing around. In the dress I had left the other weekend. FML

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Business time

nudesurprise - 16/04/2009 14:49 - United States

Today, I was at my new apartment. My fiancé was coming home so I filled the apartment with candles and put on some sexy music. When he came up to my door, I answered the door, naked. What I didn't know was that he was bringing his dad to see the new apartment. FML

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You tried!

Noname - 15/02/2009 23:15 - United States

Today, I wanted to seduce my boyfriend so I put on my sexiest lingerie and started playing mood music. As he was eating dinner, I climbed up on the table and started seductively crawling across to him. The table collapsed under my weight. FML

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So frustrating!

Justawoman - 04/06/2014 15:52 - Denmark - Aarhus

Today, my boyfriend complained all day about being bored, so wanting to cheer him up, I put on some sexy clothes and went to his house. I got on his bed in my underwear and called him over. He quickly decided he'd rather play Diablo for the next five hours instead. FML

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Loverman

dating a manchild - 01/06/2012 23:50 - Denmark - Hellerup

Today, I arranged a romantic dinner for my boyfriend. His favourite meal, fresh flowers, scented candles. Everything went beautifully, at least until he wrapped an arm around me and whispered, "Want some dick?" into my ear. Mood horrifically ruined. FML

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boyfriendisatoss - 26/12/2009 07:22 - Australia

Today, I had two surprises for my boyfriend who was at work. One was a dessert and the other was sexy lingerie. He chose the dessert. Then told me I was an idiot. FML

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DocBastard 38

Sunday 2 September 2012 23:00

It takes approximately 0.285 seconds to realise that "Let's Get It On" by Marvin Gaye is the best mood music ever. EVER.

shireman97 6

Sunday 2 September 2012 22:58

That's some odd foreplay

Meettitan 14

Sunday 2 September 2012 23:52

Whitechapel. Nuff said.

MermaidSongXOXO 6

Sunday 2 September 2012 23:56

Tell him to choose something dubstep; he can thrust along with all the wubs. And break your pelvis.

a_commenter 3

Monday 3 September 2012 0:16

Are you sure he isn't trying to tell you something?

absolutegrrr 7

Monday 3 September 2012 0:17

I prefer cashews.

damnu 3

Monday 3 September 2012 0:18

Kiss - Lick it up Betty Blowtorch -Shut up and **** Steel Panther - Let me cum in

bronsrawr 1

Monday 3 September 2012 0:20

Let's do this, I'm a cashew!

Bodzy81 4

Monday 3 September 2012 0:54

Maybe he just finished petting the dragon and need a distraction to pass time. "Mr.Conway Twitty ladies and gentlemen" Aaaaaaa family guy....... anyone?