mcomedyman94

So cute

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take our relationship to the next level. I assumed since we live together that he meant marriage. I was wrong; the next level is me jacking him off with my feet. FML

Yummy

Today, my boyfriend thought it'd be cute to put his penis through a doughnut and try to make me eat it off. FML

Today, I found out I was pregnant. When I told my boyfriend, his response was, "I'll start watching pregnant porn to build up an attraction to it." FML