jayprz

Boredom

Today, I was going down on a girl. When I looked up she was texting. FML

Today, for my two-year anniversary I got my girlfriend a very expensive diamond necklace. She got me male enhancement pills. FML

Today, I went to a bar with two guys I was interested in. The first I'd been trying to go out with all semester. The second I had gone to dinner with and he seemed nice. I was the designated driver. They drank too much and, on the way home, hooked up in the back seat. FML