niiichelle

Miss Port Charlotte, United States 32 years-old

Anonymous 31 January 2010, 18:37 United States

Today, I'm in the hospital because I sliced my leg open. Why? I jumped off my bed and scratched myself on the metal bed frame when Miss America was crowned to Miss Virginia. I'm 20 years old, and a man. FML

238 comments

Liam. This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff France

Hot wheels

Today, I was in an elevator, and the hot girl who lives in my building and who I have a crush on got in. She was in a wheelchair with a broken leg, I panicked and tried to flirt with her, and I said, "Nice chair." She replied, "Nice bruise" and punched me in the nuts. FML

166 comments