BlackBoyFly

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Blackboyfly's favorite FMLs

By dudster25 - 10/04/2016 04:20 - United States - Hanford

Today, I was both sexting with my girlfriend and texting my professor about an upcoming essay. I accidentally sent a dickpic to my professor. FML

agreeclassic 13 392

vote type 1 40 127

By shameonme - 01/04/2016 19:46 - United States - Nampa

Today, I found out one of my friends had never seen the "Two Girls, One Cup" video, so I loaded it up and told him to watch it. I knew he was squeamish, but I didn't expect him to actually pass out. He cracked his head on the side of my desk and had to be rushed to the hospital. FML

agreeclassic 12 827

vote type 1 17 394

By haunted - 23/10/2015 20:41 - United States - Gainesville

Today, I woke up at 2am and went to use the toilet. I sat there doing my business, when I heard a voice whisper my name from behind me. I live alone and the toilet is right up against the wall. I screamed and ran back to my room, then went without sleep for the rest of the night. FML

agreeclassic 26 589

vote type 1 2 420

By moonbears - 22/10/2015 16:46 - United States - Portland

Today, as I tried to parallel park at a busy spot downtown, a group of teens jumped in front of my car and started a slow clap. FML

agreeclassic 23 105

vote type 1 2 835

By wellshitthen - 21/10/2015 19:30 - United States - Westborough

Today, my long time girlfriend flew across the country to visit. My asshat roommate decided to introduce himself to her while I was in the bathroom. She left and won't answer my calls. He won't tell me what he said to her. FML

agreeclassic 27 267

vote type 1 1 763

wellshitthen app_comment_confession_title

wellshitthen 14

Thursday 29 October 2015 3:54

Hey all, OP here. Surprisingly, it turned out as a happy ending! My girlfriend asked my roommate to keep me busy for a while so she could run out and grab a birthday gift that she ordered at a local store since she couldn't fly it in with her. My roommate is still an asshat for choosing to give me a heart attack as a way to keep me busy, but it could have been a lot worse.