Nickimariek

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Michigan
29 years-old
Thursday 06 June 1996
single

A propos de Nickimariek

Michigan. I try to talk to any/everyone.? Snap: NickiMarieK ? Kik; NicoleKruger

Nickimariek - Followers

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Nickimariek's favorite FMLs

By Fat Dad - 03/03/2009 21:27 - United States

Today, I drove my two kids to their friends' houses. In my convertible, looking what I though was my best, I slowed down outside a bar with cute 20 year old girls in front. My daughter noticed the speed reduction and said, "Keep driving dad, you're fat and mom left you for a reason." FML

agreeclassic 56 666

vote type 1 43 837

It's true, though

By humiliated - 20/03/2016 11:54 - United Kingdom - London

Today, at the supermarket, I picked up a pack of toilet rolls, at which point my 5-year-old daughter turned to me and screamed, "A CLEAN BUTTHOLE IS A HAPPY BUTTHOLE!" in front of a dozen other people. I have no idea where she heard that. FML

agreeclassic 22 158

vote type 1 2 363

By toot_toot_turtle - 17/03/2016 03:41 - United States - Monroe

Today, at my brother's baseball practice, two 6 year-old girls wanted a piggy back ride. I get this a lot due to my size, so after telling their mom how good I was with kids, I let one get on my back. I then promptly tripped over a puppy and face planted, resulting in a crying child. FML

agreeclassic 18 901

vote type 1 2 704

toot_toot_turtle app_comment_confession_title

toot_toot_turtle 8

Monday 21 March 2016 3:47

I forgot to add that both the kid and puppy are fine. My pride? I will never be able to go to my brothers baseball games again. D:

By Wolf6661 - 14/03/2016 18:29 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, as a mascot for a pet store, I had to fake my own death to stop a little girl having a temper tantrum because she couldn't take me home. FML

agreeclassic 20 814

vote type 1 1 771

Wolf6661 app_comment_confession_title

Wolf6661 22

Tuesday 15 March 2016 3:51

OP here, to fill in the gaps the little girl was about 8 maybe 9 and the parents did try and stop her but it wasn't working, so I felt they needed a hand. To answer the questions of how she reacted, well after she poked and prodded my "dead body", let's just say my ears are still ringing from her shrill little scream of outrage at my "death". Alright well have a nice day y'all taco taco burrito.

Blasted

By coolest_mom - 25/11/2015 06:00

Today, while changing my daughter's diaper, I lifted up her butt to wipe her, which coincidentally caused her to fart. I hadn't wiped her yet so the force of air caused poop to fly at me at high speed, landing on my chest and face. My husband burst out laughing, saying, "You've been ass-blasted!" FML

agreeclassic 28 070

vote type 1 2 973