thenewredhead

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26 years-old
Saturday 30 January 1999
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Thenewredhead's favorite FMLs

By mrWrong - 25/03/2009 01:20 - United States

Today, my rescue squad unit responded to a 911 call from a woman who felt she was going to pass out. We knocked on her locked door a couple times with no answer. Fearing she might be unconscious, I kicked in the door. She was about to open it and only passed out from the concussion I gave her. FML

agreeclassic 541

vote type 1 60

By regretsteachinghighschool - 05/11/2013 13:22 - United States - Rochester

Today, while teaching juniors about black holes, I said, "Imagine everything being sucked into a black hole." An African-American student shouted, "I'd better start clenching!" Nobody took the lesson seriously after that. FML

agreeclassic 48 542

vote type 1 5 839

By Anonymous - 21/10/2013 19:07 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad came into my room, looked at my laptop, and said he could hear the porn I was watching all the way from his room. I wasn't watching porn. We soon realised it was actually coming from his mobile phone. FML

agreeclassic 59 885

vote type 1 4 489

Photography nerd

By Anonymous - 20/09/2013 23:44 - United States - Boston

Today, the girl I like sent me a nude photo of herself. Being a photographer, all I could think about was how grainy the photo was, and the various ways it could be fixed. FML

agreeclassic 49 153

vote type 1 21 964

By Grand Slam - 10/09/2013 18:44 - Belgium - Leuven

Today, I had a dream in which I was playing tennis. As I hit a powerful serve, I suddenly woke up due to having slapped myself in the face. FML

agreeclassic 46 767

vote type 1 6 753