xf0rg0tt3nx

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Mobile, Alabama, USA
34 years-old
Thursday 17 January 1991
Not specified

A propos de Xf0rg0tt3nx

I'm perverted. I'm mature (for the most part). I'm highly opinionated. I won't lose a fight. You'll love me once you get to know me.

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Xf0rg0tt3nx's favorite FMLs

It's a gas gas gas

By Dog fart - this FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my dog farted next to my CPAP sleep/breathing machine. The machine sucked up her fart, compressed it, and promptly injected it up both of my nostrils. FML

agreeclassic 45 381

vote type 1 4 009

Leaking

By Anonymous - this FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I learned explosive diarrhea is real. I felt it coming and dashed into our local supermarket. Ten feet in, liquid poo started spewing down my pants' legs. 150 feet to go. I ran. It ran. They watched. After 15 minutes of cleaning, I slunk out. Now, I have to find a new supermarket, maybe a new town. FML

agreeclassic 45 642

vote type 1 3 641

By Missy - 09/09/2009 20:16 - United States

Today, I was sitting on a park bench with my very elderly grandfather while listening to music at a low volume. Suddenly, he turned to me and said very loudly, "I DIDN'T KNOW YOU HAD AIDS!" I received strange looks from everyone because he mistook my ear buds for a hearing aid. FML

agreeclassic 42 952

vote type 1 4 625

By megxox - 16/07/2009 07:26 - Canada

Today, I learned that when you flush the toilet, the contents do not disappear into oblivion. They show up in your basement when your sewer backs up. And they come in greater numbers. FML

agreeclassic 54 640

vote type 1 4 208

meg_xox app_comment_confession_title

meg_xox 0

Thursday 16 July 2009 19:33

So this is my FML (and I'm pretty overjoyed that it actually got accepted), but to everyone who is talking about the pipes...this is a house we're renting and we didn't know that the pipes were OLD (not cheap). And our landlord never fixed them because it would cost about $17,000 to redo everything. So we had to deal with it. And we found this out AFTER the basement was flooded. So while I appreciate your attempt to insult me, didn't really work =)

By Anonymous - 07/06/2009 15:53 - United States

Today, I was playing around with my sister's kitten. As a joke, I put him underneath the sheets and farted. He attacked my nuts. FML

agreeclassic 176

vote type 1 989