•
•
•

captenawesome

0

0

15

0

1557

212

Captenawesome

Although I don't enjoy most people's company, I enjoy their misfortunes.

Captenawesome -

Captenawesome -

Captenawesome

lovers5201

Ashamed_Si...

peachykeen...

linderp

wheresmyma...

Hop6e

_Tater_Tot...

MissJennya...

sarahyep

Miss_Mandi

koolboi69

KayDee29

1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8

Hop6e

sarahyep

pharm121

whitnayfor...

carrela

i_love_him...

Captenawesome

Captenawesome

Anonymous - 22/08/2014 22:18 - United States - Indianapolis

Today, I finally told my dad that I hate his girlfriend. I said her daughter's a complete whore, and her son is annoying as fuck. Turns out they were in the house and within earshot, ready to throw me a birthday party. FML

27 237

49 659

Anonymous - 31/07/2014 16:24 - United States - Dallas

Today, my son said his first word. Unfortunately, that word was "cock." I've tried convincing myself that he's trying to say "clock" but I just can't do it. FML

44 257

7 776

Artistry

confusing - 06/06/2014 19:00 - Zimbabwe

Today, my students turned in their male figure artwork. One absolute idiot had the smart idea of drawing me and the TA as some kind of gay lovers. I was torn between disgust at the explicitness, anger at the disrespect, and yet awe at how well-drawn it was. FML

48 136

6 872

possibly fucked - 22/06/2014 20:34 - Portugal - Lisbon

Today, my wife bought a strap-on. I'm about fifty miles beyond terrified. FML

66 941

9 563

The Pitt

Anonymous - 18/06/2014 19:06 - United States - Lake Wales

Today, we had a guy come into the hospital with a carrot stuck deep in his anus. I've heard all kinds of ridiculous cover stories, but his took the cake; he claimed the phone rang while he was showering and he slipped onto a box of vegetables. Guess who had to extract the carrot. FML

57 535

5 045