Love Today, I got dumped. Apparently, because we clicked together... - FML

3_n_Done - 21/01/2016 18:31 - United States - Tracy

Today, I got dumped. Apparently, because we clicked together so well and so quickly, I must have deep problems, like "probability stalking" her. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, the phone rang, it was some woman who wanted to speak to my dad. “It’s probably his mistress,” I said jokingly. Turns out it was. FML

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Today, I was showing my mum how to use eBay. Unfortunately I didn't notice my recent purchase history was on display: a huge black dildo, a jockstrap, and a bong amongst them. Of course, she did. FML

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Today, I bought a Halloween costume for my cat. FML

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Today, it’s been four and a half months that my wife is pregnant. It’s been a long and hard process, but we made it. Now she says she hates it, she can’t stop thinking about how her life, body, and identity got ruined, and how she wishes she was dead. I'm a simple man. I was happy. FML

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Today, my colleague Skyped me to tell me my tampon string was hanging out my shorts. I had just come from lunch with 5 other colleagues. FML

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Today, I woke up again to a warm trickling sensation on my neck. It would seem my rabbit has a thing for doing his business on me to wake me up. FML

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