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The all-time greatest FMLs

****** around, found out

By I blame Youtube - 05/01/2023 00:00

Today, my teenage son broke into my gun safe, took my gun, and dumped the magazine into the side of his ex-girlfriend's family home. He's completely stunned that he was arrested and charged with attempted murder. My wife blames me and wants a divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 491

You deserved it 714

Poor good boy

By they don’t die they multiply - 16/11/2021 08:02

Today, after an emergency, my sister’s kids had to spend the night at my house. While I was asleep, they absolutely trashed my place top to bottom. In the morning my sister came in, said, “Wow, what a mess! Bye!” without offering to help clean up or make her kids do it. They drew on my dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 491

You deserved it 192

Can't face it

By bearded lady - 08/06/2020 14:03

Today, thanks to all my medications, I've been growing thick, dark hair on my face. I decided to use hair removal cream instead of shaving. The cream removed every trace of hair, but also made my skin about 4 times lighter than the rest of my face. It's even more noticeable than the beard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 490

You deserved it 255

How ungrateful of her

By Anonymous - 13/01/2023 18:00

Today, after moving hundreds of miles to take care of my beloved grandmother and working like mad for a week to make the house cozy and accessible for her, it was finally time to bring her home. Or it would have been, if she hadn’t died in her sleep last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 490

You deserved it 128

By Youalreadyknowmyname - 19/07/2019 14:00 - United States - Jeffersonville

Today, a guy asked me my name and I told him it's Holly. He then asked if I was "real or a Holligram?" Apparently, The Office is the best, and only place to get pick up lines. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 490

You deserved it 279

Firehose

By PissingMeOff - 16/10/2020 13:55 - United Kingdom - Durham

Today, I found out that my boyfriend pees in the shower. This would've been OK if he was peeing into the drain. Instead, he pees on the shampoo and soap bottles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 490

You deserved it 146

Stubborn

By Anonymous - 27/10/2020 22:58

Today, my boyfriend accused me of making an FML about him. I let him know that if I were going to make an FML, it would be about how he doesn’t flush the toilet after he uses it. He responded by not flushing the toilet again this morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 490

You deserved it 290

Desperate man

By Anonymous - 23/02/2021 17:01

Today, I have been married for nearly 16 years. I've not had sex in over three years. My wife spends all hours chatting and gaming online with friends, and when she finally crashes into bed, she just goes to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 490

You deserved it 226

Greed

By Anonymous - 27/09/2020 20:03

Today, my husband told me he wants a $600 birthday gift. He doesn't understand why I said that wasn't happening, and is now mad at me. Not only can we not afford that, he only spent less than $10 on my birthday gift last month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 490

You deserved it 130

No no fap season

By WhatTheactual - 15/10/2022 04:00

Today, I had a very hot sex dream about my female coworker. It was so good I woke up practically rock hard, jerked off, and had an amazing orgasm. There’s just one problem: I’m a gay guy, in a committed relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 490

You deserved it 674

Rude

By Anonymous - 30/08/2020 02:01

Today, my brother-in-law still insists on referring to me as "his brother's wife" and tells everyone I'm not his "sister-in-law." I've been married to his brother for 10 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 489

You deserved it 180

They can't feel you

By Anonymous - 25/08/2020 17:03 - United Kingdom - Bristol

Today, I went to a funeral with my family. As we were walking on the grass to the burial site, my 5-year-old brother curiously asks, in a not-so-quiet voice, "Sissy, are we walking on dead people?" It was hard to answer his question with so many glaring people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 489

You deserved it 164

Lonely boi

By 733yoda - 28/06/2019 00:30

Today, the most exciting notification I received was Amazon telling me that my bulk order of toilet paper had been shipped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 489

You deserved it 271

Rock Bottom Riser

By Anonymous - 27/03/2020 08:19

Today I realized that my boyfriend has more money on his Metro card than I have in my entire bank account. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 489

You deserved it 306

Yeah, just blame me!

By Anonymous - 17/10/2020 11:02

Today, after I found out my husband cheated on me and then yesterday had to stop him from trying to kill himself, he's now moved out and has decided that this is all my fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 489

You deserved it 146

By tenniemo - 10/08/2019 14:00

Today, I caught one of my students checking out my butt while I was helping another student at his table. I teach 8th grade. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 489

You deserved it 432

Vibe check

By Anonymous - 06/07/2021 14:01

Today, I started my first day of nursing clinicals. My first patient was none other than my ex-girlfriend, who I recently broke up with. She has an STI. She told me I needed to get checked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 489

You deserved it 162

Chewbacca goes surfing

By Anonymous - 24/09/2019 18:00

Today, my wax appointment cancelled on me, we’re supposed to be going to Hawaii in the morning and now I can’t wear a bikini because my stomach and back are hairier than my husband's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 489

You deserved it 482