Today, the kindergarten teacher asked my five-year-old why he...

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By Alexaplayphantom - 18/04/2018 08:11

Today, the kindergarten teacher asked my five-year-old why he wasn't singing the Happy Song with the other students. His response? "I don't like the Happy Song. I like the Phantom of the Opera." FML

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raganerus 17

Friday 20 April 2018 20:13

this is not a FML

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Today, at work, I dropped two bottles of wine on the floor. Unbelievably, they both didn't break. That, however, did not stop my boss from taking a few points away on my evaluation. My $3 raise is now reduced to $0.25. FML

agreeclassic 28 005

vote type 1 3 204

Today, while at a school anti-drugs assembly, the speaker asked everyone to stand up if they knew someone who had died of an overdose. As I stood up, my friend hit me in the side, making me laugh. I stood frozen under accusing glares while the speaker bitched me out for a good 5 minutes. FML

agreeclassic 34 460

vote type 1 12 776

Today, I started talking to a friend about how he needs to stop overreacting and getting angry very easily. He kicked sand up in the air, and it came back into his eyes. He started getting angry, and when I told him this is what I was talking about, he hit me in the nose. FML

agreeclassic 32 065

vote type 1 7 548

Today, I made eye-contact with a cute guy in a store. Too bad he saw me buying anti-diarrhea medicine. FML

agreeclassic 1 787

vote type 1 227

Today, after my housemate handed in his notice to vacate without telling me beforehand, I had few days whilst working to make a decision to stay or vacate. In a panic, I chose vacate. On my day off I sat down with my finances and discovered I can't afford elsewhere. I asked to stay, my landlord put up rent by 50%. I might now become homeless. FML

agreeclassic 997

vote type 1 253

Today, while jetlagged and going through customs in Singapore, I grabbed what I thought was a pen to fill out the form. I heard it squeak as I lifted it up. It was a straw in the custom agent's drink. The resulting noise he made lasted 10+ seconds. FML

agreeclassic 1 968

vote type 1 405