Animals: Today, I was playing with my dog, and he put his claw into my...

the same thing happened to me but my friend an I were play fighting and he was the one who scratched my cornia. I had to wear an eye patch for a month or two

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Today, my boyfriend wanted to prove how honest he is so he showed me numerous texts in his phone where he told other women he was in a relationship before asking them to sleep with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 637

You deserved it 3 366

Today, during a family reunion, my 89 year-old grandma stood up and drunkenly made a speech about how ashamed I should be of myself for still being single. She then passed out at the table. Half my family got up to help her, the other half whispered in agreement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 829

You deserved it 167

Today, I decided to try a new hairstyle. I ended up with a haircut that makes me look like a cross between a mullet head and a pineapple. My friends are planning on making fun of me for a few weeks, so might as well shave it all off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 590

You deserved it 271

Today, the massive snowstorm that has been mercilessly attacking my city for the past week started causing random, brief blackouts every 2-5 minutes. I'm very sick, so the last thing I need is for this house to be cold. FML

I agree, your life sucks 876

You deserved it 147

Today, my girlfriend woke me up at 5 a.m. because she thought someone was watching her from the park. It was a trash can. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 783

You deserved it 3 493

Today, I bought a jacket with real fur on it. Turns out, i'm allergic and now my ears look like they have herpes on them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 347

You deserved it 47 826