The Top

The most agreed on FMLs The most commented on FMLs The most favorited

The top of the day The top of the week The top of the month The top of the year

The all-time greatest FMLs

Messy

By Anonymous - 09/08/2025 09:00 - Australia

Today, I absent-mindedly poured the putrid water from the sink’s air trap into the sink that I'd just removed the air trap out of, and flooded the cupboard I then had to crawl into. FML

I agree, your life sucks 215

You deserved it 343

It doesn't get better as you get older

By Anonymous - 19/12/2022 09:00

Today, I woke up with a stinky smell piercing my nose. Yesterday there was a party at my boss’s house, where I got super drunk and passed out. When I regained consciousness, I realized my panties were wet, my pants were wet, and, of course, the bed was wet. I’m 21 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 215

You deserved it 1 393

Same as it ever was

By Anonymous - 01/05/2026 00:00 - United States

Today, at my high school reunion, my old bully tried to apologize but I told her to fuck off. She wouldn't leave me alone, so I purposely spilled my drink on her. I got kicked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 215

You deserved it 586

Stuck on you

By Anonymous - 10/02/2025 15:00 - United States - Kansas City

Today, I put on a new pair of jeans and went out. Halfway through my errands, I realized the long sticker with my size was still on the back. I walked around for quite a while advertising my embarrassing waist and leg measurements. FML

I agree, your life sucks 215

You deserved it 336

Red pill dingus

By Anonymous - 10/06/2024 22:00

Today, my son is refusing to find a girlfriend because, as he puts it, “Them woke bitches just want my money.” He lives alone, has a good job and lots of friends, but he never asks anyone out, and when women ask him out, he practically hisses at them like a feral cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 215

You deserved it 604

Booger block

By Anonymous - 23/10/2024 20:00 - United Kingdom - Clydebank

Today, I woke up with a really annoying bogey blocking my nose. Eventually, I just covered the other nostril and snorted as hard as I could. Good news, it came flying out. Bad news, it landed in my eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 378

Five bucks

By DreamZ - 24/05/2024 20:00 - Canada

Today, I walked into work feeling confident in my new outfit. It wasn’t until lunchtime that a colleague pointed out the price tag hanging from my skirt. I’d been flaunting my ass's price all morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 372

Practice makes perfect

By Anonymous - 20/09/2023 04:00 - Ukraine

Today, I have a permanently injured right hand. Social media star Real86Hands has no hands. Guess which one of us has better penmanship? FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 501

Distractions

By Anonymous - 14/10/2023 07:30

Today, I was looking online at the gym memberships in my neighborhood, because I'm getting old and unfit. As I was looking at the prices, thanks to some well-placed advertisement magic, I found myself ordering a pizza, then binge-watching Netflix. It seems that motivation is just a click away, but pizza is my kryptonite. FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 616

The accident

By Anonymous - 27/05/2024 16:00

Today, I'm 36 and accidentally got pregnant with my FWB, a 28 year-old bartender. I told him and he broke down and admitted he’s actually only 19, an unemployed college dropout who lives with his parents. I didn’t believe it until I saw his driver's license, date of birth 2004. So much for child support… FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 1 053

Not now, dude

By Ethan - 09/09/2025 09:00 - United States

Today, during a video job interview, I tried to sound professional by saying, “I always give 110%.” At that exact moment, my roommate burst into the room, holding a burrito and yelling, “You can’t even give 100% to doing the dishes.” The interviewer muted their mic, but I could see them shaking with laughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 349

The heart wants what it wants

By Anonymous - 16/11/2023 14:00 - Portugal

Today, I realized I'm in love with both my boyfriend of several years as well with a guy I recently met, meaning I'm polyamorous (which I always kinda knew). The problem is I don't want to leave my current boyfriend, and I really want to be with the new guy, but both situations are incompatible, which is making me miserable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 1 221

Tasty!

By Andrew Williams - 12/01/2023 06:00

Today, on the kitchen counter, there was a plate that had snacks on it. I decided to take a bite. I spat it out. Later on, my mother told me it was dog food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 815

Nutrition expert over here

By Dog - 02/01/2026 03:00

Today, as I fed my dog his dinner of chicken offal, a drumstick, a wing, a mackerel, and a raw egg, my dad bitched and moaned that I waste money feeding him meat instead of just buying the cheapest kibble at the store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 363

Whiny Husky

By FML Videos - 18/11/2018 00:00

But moooooooom...

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 54

By Anonymous - 27/02/2010 12:17 - United States

Today, I found out I can sneak out of my house... but not back in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 213

You deserved it 343

Lore dump

By Anonymous - 30/04/2025 03:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I made the mistake of showing an interest as my boyfriend was playing the new Assassin's Creed. Now I like that he enjoys gaming, but I was not expecting to be given a crash course in Assassin's Creed lore and history all the way back to the first game. It lasted ages. FML

I agree, your life sucks 213

You deserved it 403

Carpool karaoke

By Anonymous - 27/11/2024 00:00 - Canada

Today, I was singing loudly in my car at a red light, completely oblivious. When I finished the song, I turned to see a bus full of passengers watching (and also some of them filming) my performance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 213

You deserved it 436

Leave me alone

By Just fucking wank it off already and stop bugging me - 09/08/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, my man has quit watching porn for "health benefits." Before, he only wanted sex once or twice a month. Now it's almost every damn night. Every time I try to convince him to go back to porn, he throws a tantrum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 213

You deserved it 788

Who's the asshat in this scenario?

By Anonymous - 22/04/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, my mom told me that I will never see my siblings again because I refused to attend her wedding to another woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 213

You deserved it 885

Taking it too far

By Anonymous - 11/09/2021 23:00 - Bangladesh - Chittagong

Today, I was playing GTA V, and being the horny bastard that I am, I went to the club and was getting a lap dance in-game. My cousin walked in to find me kissing the TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 213

You deserved it 3 180

Hanky panky

By Next In Line - 01/08/2023 00:02

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in his car and we got caught. He’s being detained because I’m underage. My parents were called and are on their way. I had told them I was studying for final exams with a classmate. I feel like I’m next in line on death row. FML

I agree, your life sucks 213

You deserved it 1 459

Don't get too comfortable working from home

By Anonymous - 10/05/2022 06:00 - Netherlands - Utrecht

Today, just make sure to mute your mic in a meeting before doing anything… anything like flushing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 213

You deserved it 1 045

Sorry kiddo

By CatastrophicKatie - 18/09/2022 15:30 - United States - Lawrenceburg

Today, I had to back down and buy a popsocket, which I'd declared useless and stupid since they first came out. I had to buy one after dropping my phone on my toddler's head while he was sleeping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 213

You deserved it 1 104

STOP! BAD DOG!

By Anonymous - 08/03/2024 12:00 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, the family dog escaped and I ran after her. She started attacking a random dog, so I started clapping and yelling, trying to get her attention. After I got her away, my hands started swelling. I clapped my hands so hard that they're swollen and bruised. FML

I agree, your life sucks 213

You deserved it 477

Pikachu!

By Pokémon Loser - 16/01/2025 03:00 - Philippines - Paranaque City

Today, a fresh gust of wind blew a really attractive woman's skirt up in front of me, revealing her yellow panties with Pikachu's face on it. Pulling her skirt down and giving me an evil leer, instead of apologizing, I somehow blurted out, "Pikachu!" imitating its voice. I ultimately got slapped on the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 212

You deserved it 843

Humblebragging much?

By Anonymous - 26/11/2023 16:00 - Sweden - Lidingoe

Today, I realized I have rejected at least five marriage offers and about the same number of women who've wanted to have my children. I have never been into kids or marriage, but all my girlfriends and some FWBs turn into marriage and kid crazy wannabe housewives after a while. FML

I agree, your life sucks 212

You deserved it 873

Looking good

By Alex - 31/07/2024 16:00 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, I was expecting a package from Amazon, so when the doorbell rang I rushed out in my pajamas. It wasn't the delivery guy. It was my ex and her new boyfriend, here to drop off some of my old stuff. I'd answered the door wearing an anime onesie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 212

You deserved it 551

By Daddy - 03/03/2008 03:33

Today, I told my son off because he lost a form. A form that I later found in my right-hand pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 212

You deserved it 791

For Life

By worshippingatthethrone - 17/02/2022 10:00

Today, I had pizza for lunch, a cheesy burrito and cheese rice for dinner, topped off with a big bowl of ice cream. Three hours later, I puked it all up. I guess you never outgrow lactose intolerance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 212

You deserved it 1 670

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Birthday Family Miscellaneous Cute Friends Relatable My ex I need your advice Love NSFW Awkward Sex Intimacy Scary Technology Annoying Work Money Capitalism Embarrassing Divorce Education Health Sports Abuse Kids Hospital Wanker Addiction Management

The Top

Today, I had just finished up at work. I was standing on a street corner, waiting to cross to get to my car on the other side. I had three people pull up beside me and ask me how much I charged. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 783

You deserved it 10 111

Today, I was so sick that I was puking and had the runs. While on the toilet, I yelled for my boyfriend to get me a bowl to puke in. As I did so, I saw that a ton of it was forming on the floor in dots. My boyfriend had given me a spaghetti strainer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 071

You deserved it 4 448

Today, I was having it off with my boyfriend. He's the kind of guy that likes to keep things interesting. Just as he started climaxing, he began to meow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 162

You deserved it 8 814

Today, my boyfriend had the very expensive watch he got me for Xmas resized. I dropped it trying to put it on and shattered the glass. The warranty won't cover it because of the adjustments made. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 896

You deserved it 1 452

Today, my son turned 18. He now calls me by my first name instead of "dad" and refuses to stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 777

You deserved it 570

Today, I texted my boss to tell him that I'd be late because of a dentist appointment. Auto-correct decided to change "dentist" to "exorcist." So, I ended up sending, "Sorry, I’ll be late today. I have an exorcist appointment." My boss's reply was, "Take all the time you need." Now he looks at me like I’m possessed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 304

You deserved it 324