The Top

The most agreed on FMLs The most commented on FMLs The most favorited

The top of the day The top of the week The top of the month The top of the year

The all-time greatest FMLs

Slice of Freudian slip

By Myrin - 29/12/2022 18:00

Today, I was talking to my wife about the pie she'd made and she was really leaning on the need to be reassured, so I said, "It was real good Mom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 596

You deserved it 359

Iron Chef America

By Anonymous - 05/01/2021 19:59

Today, I thought about trying something "new", so I put raspberry preserves and maple syrup on my waffles. It tasted like cough medicine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 596

You deserved it 461

Christmas family fun

By KittyT - 25/12/2023 12:00 - Australia - Buderim

Today, on Christmas Eve, I got dumped. Why? Because he couldn't live with my psychotic sister after she threatened to get him arrested if she punched him, because he's black. We still love each other and we're in tears having to separate until we can get a house in the housing crisis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 596

You deserved it 219

Obsession by Calvin Klein

By Carrie - 04/12/2020 20:02 - United States - Birmingham

Today, I was at a party with my crush, but I didn’t talk to him. After, I walked out to my car, and saw a dent in my car. I then noticed that the dent was exactly the size of my crush’s head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 596

You deserved it 354

Today, I knew nothing. FML

By FML Approved - 13/07/2017 03:40

Could you see Kit Harington as anyone other than John Snow? Well there's no need to imagine it now that Jimmy Kimmel has revealed the long lost audition tapes! (It's a good thing that Harrington landed the role he did. Daenerys doesn't suit him.)

I agree, your life sucks 596

You deserved it 160

Drama farmers

By Anonymous - 12/03/2024 12:00 - United States - Dallas

Today, my dad lectured me because my mom cried herself to sleep last night. Why? Because I didn't want to watch a movie with her. I had to go to sleep to be up for work at 6 a.m., and was too tired to watch a movie in the first place. I live with drama queens. FML

I agree, your life sucks 596

You deserved it 113

The staircase

By Anonymous - 19/05/2024 12:00 - Germany - Eichstaett

Today, I broke my arm because my fucking ass friend pushed me off the stairs, and while I was in pain and was screaming, no one helped me. The worst part is that it happened at school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 596

You deserved it 82

There's more than one subject available

By Anonymous - 17/03/2022 12:00 - United States - Morganville

Today, I realized how bad my social skills are when I finally landed a date with my crush. We sat down to lunch, and I asked her what her favorite Marvel movies were. She gave a flat, "I don't like those movies." and we deadass sat there in silence for ten minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 596

You deserved it 933

By préjugéfrançais - 08/04/2013 08:27 - Mexico - Quer

Today, I’m in Mexico for an internship. I was at a party when a drunk guy harangued me, calling me a liar because my dancing was, “too good for a French girl.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 596

You deserved it 61

By alex - 05/03/2008 15:17 - France

Today, after shaking my boss's hand, I noticed that he had a piece of toilet paper stuck to one of his fingernails. FML

I agree, your life sucks 596

You deserved it 46

You can't handle the truth!

By Anonymous - 27/04/2023 00:00

Today, my friend told me she saw the girl I like at a single's night after I'd asked her out and rejecting me, for being in a complicated relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 596

You deserved it 265

Involontary caregiver

By Caretaker - 06/10/2025 00:00

Today, I got word that my aunt has dementia and will be moving into our big family estate. And just like with my grandpa, grandma, great-aunt, great-uncle, other grandma, father, and uncle, I will be expected to put my life on hold and be her primary caretaker. I never got my own life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 596

You deserved it 107

Outsider

By Anonymous - 05/08/2025 00:00 - United States

Today, I went to a party for my surrogate mom. She announced she wanted a family pic, so her bio kids & other “adopted” kids crowded around her. I hung back, unsure if I was wanted. My mom called my name & waved me over. I walked over with a big smile on face, thrilled to be included. She asked me to take the pic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 595

You deserved it 86

Girls' trip, baby!

By Anonymous - 27/12/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, my I told my girlfriend I was owed an explanation as to why I've been ghosted since her "Girls' trip" out of state. She said she just didn't want to deal with me being upset about her snapping a guy she spent the two days with, and they were all over each in a picture she tried to hide. FML

I agree, your life sucks 595

You deserved it 103

Nature calls

By Anonymous - 29/11/2023 00:00

Today, I got to my log cabin after an hour's hiking. I lit the fire because it was freezing and my stupid dog sniffed the fire, looked me in the eye, then jumped right into the fire and knocked the logs everywhere. My cabin is now ashes and I had an hour's hike back to my car with my stupid dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 595

You deserved it 200

Is this an ad in disguise?

By Anonymous - 07/02/2024 09:00 - United States - Atlanta

Today, it's the day after I turned 40; I live in chronic pain and think about suicide on a daily basis. I have complex PTSD due to my military career and torment with high school bullies. Today I saw one of my HS tormentors co-starring in the new Guy Ritchie movie trailer, "The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare." So, seriously, FML

I agree, your life sucks 595

You deserved it 151

Sad boat

By Anonymous - 22/02/2026 15:00

Today, my best friend died in a car accident. I'm currently on a cruise with my family and my parents refuse to pay for me to go home early, which means I'm likely going to miss the funeral. FML

I agree, your life sucks 595

You deserved it 86

Corporate shenanigans

By Anonymous - 14/03/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, I was fired from my job because I called out my supervisor for withholding my W-2s (wage and tax statements). I know full well it's a retaliatory action. However, the store manager is ducking all my calls when I try to report it. I can't afford a lawyer, especially when the company is a multi-billion dollar brand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 595

You deserved it 126

Speed 3

By ihatewasps - 30/08/2023 20:00

Today, I was stuck on a bus for an hour with a wasp buzzing around. I have a severe phobia of wasps. I was crying by time I reached my destination. FML

I agree, your life sucks 595

You deserved it 214

My house, anyone's rules

By Anonymous - 23/01/2026 22:00

Today, my parents moved my senile grandpa in with us, but he keeps yelling at me for gaming and sometimes just switches my computer off. This is my house, not theirs. I work remotely, I’m not gaming, and their unemployed asses can’t even watch him closely enough to keep him out of my home office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 595

You deserved it 103

Nature sucks

By JoanAsIs - 15/10/2023 13:30 - United Kingdom - Coventry

Today, my friends convinced me to go on a "short" hike. Little did I know, they're actually all avid hikers, whilst I'm more of an "indoor enthusiast." I've now been climbing a never-ending hill for hours, hallucinating about my cozy couch, and praying for a miracle to deliver pizza to the summit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 595

You deserved it 385

Bunged up

By Anonymous - 17/03/2024 22:00 - United Kingdom

Today, the medication I’ve been taking has caused me to become constipated for so long I'm now unable to go, because all my poop is a solid mass in my bowels no stool softener can touch. So a surgeon is either going up my ass with a hose and a spoon, or cutting open my stomach to remove it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 595

You deserved it 95

Smelly business

By skunkcat - 11/03/2020 21:00 - United States

Today, I was drunk in a hotel lobby with some of my cousins. I went out on the patio to get some fresh air when I saw a black cat in the bushes. I went straight over to it and started to pet it. I realized too late that the black cat was actually a skunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 595

You deserved it 1 785

Next step: Love

By Anonymous - 20/08/2023 16:00 - United States

Today, I was helping my boyfriend of 8 years set up his Google Mini after he complained a thousand times that it wasn't working. As I successfully set up, I got to the part where one can set up speed dial contacts and we looked for my contact on his phone. I saw my name was saved as 'Lust'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 594

You deserved it 164

By Thanderska - 04/03/2008 01:02

Today, while playing golf, someone broke my nose. The clubhouse calls an ambulance, and I go to hospital. I call my girlfriend to come and pick me up downstairs; she runs over my foot with her car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 594

You deserved it 55

Many such cases

By Anonymous - 06/04/2025 12:00 - Australia

Today, I organised a birthday party for myself. There was supposed to be about 20 people coming. Not a single person showed up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 594

You deserved it 84

Who are you?

By Anonymous - 21/01/2025 20:00 - United States - Clifton

Today, I got the chance to confront the guy who raped me when we were teenagers. Not only did he not remember me, he genuinely had no idea he'd done anything wrong, and called me a lunatic before walking away. The look of utterly sincere bafflement on his face is seared into my memory. FML

I agree, your life sucks 594

You deserved it 150

I dunno, fam

By Anonymous - 15/09/2023 14:00 - India - Bengaluru

Today, my 37 year-old cousin said she wants to cheat on her long-time, loving husband because she never got to have any fun in her life. He would never do it to her. She told me this information because she thinks I would "understand" her situation. I really don't know what to do with this information. FML

I agree, your life sucks 594

You deserved it 136

Not-so-biker chick

By Kris - 24/09/2023 10:00 - Canada

Today, I thought it was about time to learn to ride a bike as an adult. I wobbled down the street, lost my balance, and crashed into a parked ice cream truck. The owner yelled at me, and I was left with a bruised ego and no ice cream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 594

You deserved it 221

Brutal

By femmr - 03/09/2021 23:01 - Netherlands - Leusden

Today, I really wanted Anne Hathaway bangs, and let my mom cut my hair. I now look like Patty Farrell from "Diary of a Wimpy Kid". FML

I agree, your life sucks 594

You deserved it 460

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Annoying Hospital Work Management Language DIY Miscellaneous Relatable Mysterious Awkward Cars Embarrassing Cooking Coworkers Love Anniversary Divorce Transportation Health Surgery Healthy Lifestyle Growing old Technology Money Ironic Animals Relationships Horses Jealousy Birds

The Top

Today, I finally felt ready to lose my virginity with my boyfriend. Unfortunately he was too embarrassed to go and buy some condoms, and suggested in all seriousness that we use a sandwich bag instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 782

You deserved it 3 942

Today, the girl that I have been secretly madly in love with for 6 years told me "fuck off and stop doing nice things for me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 902

You deserved it 10 362

Today, I was waiting at home for a phone call. While I was in the bathroom, the phone rang. I quickly stopped my business and ran out of the bathroom with my pants round my ankles. I leaped over the couch, tripping and then stubbing my toe while hopping to the phone. It was a telemarketer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 452

You deserved it 13 722

Today, my crush was walking up to me and I put my earphones in, playing hard to get. When I heard him say something about a date I take an earphone out and say, "Oh, I didn't see you there!" His response, "They're not connected to anything," holds up the end of my earphones and walks away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 389

You deserved it 132 069

Today, my girlfriend dumped me for someone else. An hour earlier I had just gotten permission from her dad to propose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 157 455

You deserved it 7 549

Today, my mom had a fit and confessed that my grandfather is also my father. Apparently, I was the product of a rape and she further confessed that she was going to abort me but chose not to, and she regrets her decision. What caused this conversation? Me watching the season 4 of "You" without telling her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 605

You deserved it 180