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Entitled

By anonymous - 14/11/2020 13:57 - United States - Irving

Today, where I work at a pharmacy, we were short staffed and running 4 hours behind. A lady came to drop off a new prescription. When I explained to her the wait time, she called the patient. I heard, "No, they don't look busy." Like, really? FML

I agree, your life sucks 925

You deserved it 121

No more!

By Anonymous - 14/09/2024 09:00 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in months. On my way home, my legs gave out halfway up the stairs to my apartment, and I had to awkwardly sit there until I could crawl the rest of the way up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 352

You deserved it 154

By Ed - 05/12/2010 13:53 - United States

Today, I came home from work to find my five year old daughter drawing unicorns on the wall. The same wall that I had to repaint last week because it had puppies on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 680

You deserved it 11 092

Just asking questions

By <Still_Closeted> - 19/02/2022 03:59

Today, I had a long call with my crush, the only person I have been in regular contact with for the past year. He regularly calls me to check up on me, and really cares about my interests. I'm not sure if he likes me back, or is just being friendly, and I'm too scared to ask him out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 788

You deserved it 519

Leftovers

By Anonymous - 16/09/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, I woke up to my cat licking my face. Cute, right? Turns out, she was licking the crumbs off my cheek from last night's pizza party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73

You deserved it 533

By MissPerspirent - 28/09/2011 02:18 - Canada

Today, I have come to the point in my life where I need to Google how to stop excessive back sweat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 581

You deserved it 3 589

That's a lot

By Anonymous - 23/04/2023 22:00

Today, i purchased myself 150$ Egyptian cotton 800-thread count sheets for my birthday, which came with matching pillow cases and everything. My girlfriend decided to wear a bleach face cream and ruined the entire set, and then followed it up with using part of my savings to buy herself a cabin vacation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 103

You deserved it 265

Treasure hunt

By Klarissa - 18/09/2024 09:00 - United States - Milwaukee

Today, I told my roommate that I was trying to lose weight, so she kindly removed all the junk food from the kitchen. I just found it all hidden under her bed. Apparently, she didn’t trust me enough to resist temptation, and she was absolutely correct. FML

I agree, your life sucks 114

You deserved it 698

By fuckthisandfuckthatandfuckyoutoo - 28/07/2013 16:23 - United States

Today, I was preparing a customer's meal in my restaurant's kitchen, when I choked on my own saliva and went into a coughing fit. The head chef, who's always hated my guts, accused me of trying to hock a loogie into the meal and fired me on the spot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 695

You deserved it 3 576

Nervous Nelly

By Odnel - 27/07/2013 04:47 - United States - Arlington

Today, my family and I visited my cousins in Virginia. When we arrived, we found that they already had guests over. I've stuttered my whole life, so when they asked me what my name was, I stuttered for several seconds trying to say my name. Everyone burst out laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 222

You deserved it 3 841

Sounds like the start of movie…

By Anonymous - 26/02/2022 14:00 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I live in a college residence with 30 other girls in Ireland. One of them just got COVID, and we can't ask the landlord for much help because he just got Malaria. FML

I agree, your life sucks 876

You deserved it 92

What is happening right now?

By Kevin can't wait - 21/09/2024 12:00 - France - Brest

Today, I got a notification from a delivery carrier that my package had been delivered. I opened the door to find a perfectly wrapped box with no address, no label, and a note inside saying, "You’ll know when it’s time." I still don’t know what it means. FML

I agree, your life sucks 395

You deserved it 80

Egg mode

By Anonymous - 22/11/2020 22:58

Today, I found out my husband had a Pornhub account where he photoshops himself to look like a girl. The worst part is that I noticed he wore some of my maternity clothes in the pictures. I guess they were the only ones big enough to fit him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 104

You deserved it 196

Striking out

By Anonymous - 13/03/2022 00:01

Today, I met a woman at a bar, and we went back to my place with her whispering many filthy things in my ear. Then my key broke inside the lock. It was 2 a.m. and freezing, and she was in a dress, I suggested a hotel, but she was now so cold and angry, she got back in our Uber which hadn't left yet and went home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 419

You deserved it 358

Get back on the horse

By Beth - 03/05/2023 18:00 - United States - Stamford

Today, I found out that I didn't get a job I really wanted, despite doing well on third round interviews (3 hours with 6 people), and having a good connection with the person I would've reported to. Now I'm upset and dropping the ball on emailing interviewers for the other good leads I have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 811

You deserved it 207

Alexa, play "Ancient History" by The Cribs

By Freddie - 28/09/2024 12:00 - United Kingdom - Poole

Today, I was the best man at my longtime friend’s wedding. I got so into talking about our shared memories over the years that I accidentally called his bride by his ex-girlfriend’s name at the end of my toast. FML

I agree, your life sucks 109

You deserved it 589

Bye bye love

By Charm - 01/05/2026 12:00 - United States

Today, my 54 year-old partner is leaving me for his 26 year-old coworker. She’s younger than our two kids, 32 and 29. He seriously sees nothing wrong because she’s “a consenting adult.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 461

You deserved it 123

Hello, Goodbye

By Anonymous - 01/12/2020 23:02 - United Kingdom - Isleworth

Today, I left my job, fulfilling my one month's notice after receiving a job offer from a much better-paying role. After saying goodbye to everyone, I left the building. Not two minutes later, the company who was offering the new job called to say they'd changed their minds, and there was now no longer a job on offer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 663

You deserved it 147

Police protected wedding

By Tiana - 14/03/2022 02:00

Today, my stepfather currently has a restraining order of 1 Km because he kept on stalking me and my fiancée. I'm getting married in a week and I just found out that my mother invited him. I need to think fast on how to stop this scumbag from showing up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 063

You deserved it 87

Time to pretend

By fmeplease - 31/05/2009 21:10 - United Kingdom

Today, I was cleaning out my bedside table when I came across some condoms I bought on my 18th birthday, to use the first time I had sex. They expired five years ago. I'm still waiting for my first time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 318

You deserved it 12 758

Oddly specific

By Anonymous - 06/05/2026 00:00 - United States - Arlington

Today, I have no choice but to move back in with my mom and her husband, who are still married even though he's responsible for the house fire that killed my two younger brothers in 2013. FML

I agree, your life sucks 521

You deserved it 78

By TheCrackerNinja - 26/11/2010 00:55 - United States

Today, after weeks of my girlfriend telling me to be romantic, I decided to make a romantic bath for us, complete with oil bath beads. After we get ready to take the bath, she puts her hand in the water and says she won't get it because 'it feels slimy'. I enjoyed a romantic bath alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 328

You deserved it 3 989

Love at first prompt

By Jessica - 08/05/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, my 37 year-old fiance is calling off our wedding for a 21 year-old woman from Colombia he’s been talking to online. He’s gonna marry her and bring her to the US. He’s been using ChatGPT to speak with her in Spanish. I’ve spent over $5000 on our wedding and was picking up my dress next week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 542

You deserved it 72

Looking good grief

By Anonymous - 05/12/2020 23:01

Today, I was at a grocery store buying ice cream after the tragedy of losing my grandma. When I got to the cash register, the cashier saw the sadness in my eyes and said, "It's OK, you'll find the one someday, one that can look at your inner beauty and not care about the rest." He thought I'd got broken up with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 073

You deserved it 178

No friends, no problems

By Anonymous - 10/05/2023 18:00 - Ireland - Waterford

Today, I realized the only things I do are work and sleep. My only friends are coworkers who I make small talk with. I live alone so I’ve got nothing there either. I can’t remember the last time I felt happy, or spoke to someone. Everyday is just a blur. I have no hobbies, no goals. Getting older is so fun, right? FML

I agree, your life sucks 947

You deserved it 287

By not saying it was whores, but... - 16/10/2014 20:32 - United States

Today, I accidentally belched at the dinner table. At age 22, I got sent to my room with no dessert by my parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 425

You deserved it 9 146

By Shalamar - 15/12/2009 01:30 - Canada

Today, the new guy at work - who is probably at least ten years older than I am - admired the photo on my desk of myself with my husband and teenage daughters and asked, "Are those your grandchildren?" I'm in my 40's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 372

You deserved it 2 793

Insane cake situation is insane

By Ethan - 12/05/2026 12:00 - United States - Fresno

Today, at a wedding reception, on a crowded dance floor, it was a perfect opportunity for a candid photo. I took one step back without looking and bumped straight into the cake table, then watched in slow motion as the entire cake tipped and slid off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 142

You deserved it 446

By anonymous - 07/08/2012 03:08 - Australia

Today, I successfully stopped my hair straightener from falling into a bathtub full of water by grabbing hold of the burning hot plates. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 950

You deserved it 8 203

Work sucks, I know

By BadKitty42 - 14/12/2009 08:12 - United States

Today, it was my last day at work. I was offered a better job and accepted. Not wanting to leave my present boss hanging, I asked for time to give notice. While I trained my replacement, the owner at the new job had time to think about how slow the season is, and he decided not to fill the position. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 708

You deserved it 3 857

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The Top

Today, I brought a boy home for the first time, only to have my dad ask him what his mother's maiden name was. When he answered, my dad exclaimed, "Oh yeah! I think I dated her in high school. I could be your father!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 714

You deserved it 1 853

Today, I wrote the girl I love a long, gushy letter to convince her to be with me instead of her abusive ex. Later on, I asked her what she thought. She said she can't read cursive. She chose the ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 634

You deserved it 4 470

Today, I was twenty minutes into babysitting my twin baby cousins when I realized that there are no diapers to be found anywhere in the house. I have no way to get a hold of my aunt, no money to buy new diapers, and I don't even have a way to get to the store in the first place. The next few hours are going to be lovely. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 385

You deserved it 4 962

Today, I fainted for the first time in my life. I was in the shower. With my girlfriend. Apparently, my brain and my erection had a battle for who got the most blood, and my erection won. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 357

You deserved it 3 832

Today, there's a family reunion in my parents' backyard. I'm not invited because my Mom, Dad, Aunts, Uncles and Grandparents are upset that I'm divorcing my ex-husband. Apparently, trying to kill me doesn't matter since he's funny, always made excellent barbecue chicken in past reunions, and everybody loves him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 292

You deserved it 135

Today, the couch I ordered finally arrived. It was a long search and a little expensive but worth it for the extra comfort. It is perfect, except for the fact that it doesn't fit thought the staircase of my building. Now it's standing in the hallway because they won't take it back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 210

You deserved it 461