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Brain freeze

By Anonymous - 13/06/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, I work at a hospice center. At 3AM, a call just went out to a man's family to come because he was dying. I didn't realize that this man was my old friend's grandpa. When I saw her, I smiled really big and said, "Hey! Great to see you!" Her grandpa was ACTIVELY DYING. Stupid stupid stupid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 532

You deserved it 191

Shot from both sides

By Anonymous - 04/02/2023 12:00

Today, I accidentally sent a sext to my boss instead of my crush. Now I'm in the doghouse at work AND at home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 226

You deserved it 1 224

It's the new thing

By Anonymous - 31/12/2025 20:00

Today, my 14 year-old son got into a fight with his 15 year-old cousin. I say fight, my son just practically lamped him into orbit. When I yelled and asked why he did that, my son said, "He was mogging me." I had to get my phone out to look up what that even meant. I'm still not sure what it means. FML

I agree, your life sucks 291

You deserved it 79

Poop chute

By Anonymous - 04/01/2026 03:00

Today, after her shower, my wife bent over naked in front of me so I went to dive in face-first, and she farted in my face for laughs. The thing is I physically saw some pieces of shit fly out and land on my shoe, and this was after her shower when she should have been clean as a whistle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 167

Assumptions

By Anonymous - 09/11/2021 05:00

Today, I found out my boyfriend added his ex on Facebook and Instagram, all within a few days. Lucky me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 916

You deserved it 175

It's a set up!

By Anonymous - 10/02/2023 10:00 - United States - Simi Valley

Today, my brother had texted me, asking, "Why did you take Mom's chocolate? That's pathetic." I proceeded to swear on my own life that I didn't, but directly after that he sent me a picture of the wrapper in my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 112

You deserved it 1 322

Did she say yes at least?

By Anonymous - 10/02/2023 18:00

Today, I tried to propose to my partner in a creative way, but ended up getting stuck in a tree. FML

I agree, your life sucks 381

You deserved it 706

Drunk on the job

By Anonymous - 29/06/2024 09:00 - United States - Matawan

Today, I was in a rush to get my lunch for work. I quickly opened my fridge to grab it, and accidentally knocked over a beer, spilling a little on my pants. I told myself I'd spray them in the car. I forgot, and when I got into work, someone sat down and commented that they smelled beer. The person was a student. FML

I agree, your life sucks 307

You deserved it 253

A cute one for a change

By We have fun at least - 18/01/2026 00:00

Today, my dad was making a sandwich in the kitchen. Hungry, I snuck in and grabbed it, running back to my room and devouring it. Later at dinner, he dumped a whole scoop of rice in my lap. We all ended up laughing as we cleaned it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58

You deserved it 501

Emotions on shuffle mode

By Anonymous - 30/11/2021 22:58

Today, I've been single for years because I felt I could never trust anyone again. I finally opened up to someone, after she told me how much she'd loved me for quite a while. Now she ignores me like I don't even exist. Crash and burn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 011

You deserved it 145

Never the twain

By Anonymous - 21/01/2026 12:00

Today, I did a stupid thing and told my work crush that I liked her. Now, instead of living unnoticed by her, I have to live with the knowledge she doesn’t like me and only talks to me because I’m a coworker. As a bonus, she did say at least I’m not one of those quiet ones who give off SA vibes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 321

You deserved it 220

Just for a day

By Anonymous - 23/01/2026 12:00

Today, my daughter’s teacher tried to inconspicuously slide me a pamphlet for AA. When I asked her why, she told me that my daughter shared with the class that “Mommy drinks funny stuff from a bottle every single night and it tastes real bad!” Kombucha. I drink kombucha. FML

I agree, your life sucks 412

You deserved it 103

By MrRadin - 04/12/2015 05:31 - France

Today, my roommate thought of a new idea for our household. According to him, we should take dumps at work as often as we can, that way, "we'll save on toilet paper at home." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 391

You deserved it 2 358

So grateful

By Tough Crowd - 08/07/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, I called my aunt to wish her a happy birthday. My mom and I proceeded to sing "Happy Birthday" to her. The first words that came out of her mouth were, "You guys are terrible singers." You're welcome, I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 389

You deserved it 183

Highway code

By lucy the witch - 20/02/2023 14:00

Today, my son got pulled over for speeding. His excuse? The speed limit signs “aren’t posted often enough,” so he “forgot” what the limit was. I raised this dumbass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 744

You deserved it 232

By pablito - 17/04/2014 10:37 - France - Bron

Today, I'm 25 years old, I've got an education and I only now found out in front of 15 people that, no, sparrows are not small pigeons that are going to grow up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 714

You deserved it 38 511

Ambitious

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Los Angeles

Today, my daughter's biggest aspiration is to create a time machine for the sole purpose of going to the '70s to see the Ramones in concert. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 139

You deserved it 9 561

By Anonymous - 15/12/2012 08:52 - United States - Lakewood

Today, my brother paid the DJ $300 to ruin my wedding by playing the Imperial Death March as I walked down the aisle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 105

You deserved it 7 227

By Mouhahaa - 09/05/2012 03:48 - France

Today, my wife stabbed my hand with a fork, making it bleed. I'd only tried to take some fries from her plate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 671

You deserved it 36 408

The price of partying

By Rafael - 06/12/2021 17:01

Today, and since I went to a club with a few friends for the first time two days ago, I now have tinnitus, which still persists and I'm worried it might be permanent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 771

You deserved it 264

Physical imbalances in the root chakra

By Anonymous - 21/07/2024 20:00 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, I was practicing yoga at home when I heard a loud crash. My cat had managed to knock over a bookshelf while attempting to catch a fly. In my rush to save my books and knick-knacks, I tripped over my yoga mat and fell into the mess. My cat got the fly though, so that's something. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 122

By Anonymous - 20/09/2010 07:10 - United Kingdom

Today, my job application for McDonald's was rejected. This is the second time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 784

You deserved it 13 746

Sneaking Out

By FML Videos - 18/10/2018 18:30

Slow and steady isn't winning this race!

I agree, your life sucks 266

You deserved it 72

Backstabber!

By Betrayed - 23/07/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, my friend, who is dating an ex of mine, posted a story on her Instagram of their dating history. Met in 2020; First Date: 2021; Became Official: 2022. I introduced them in 2020 and he broke up with the, “It’s not you it’s me” excuse in 2022. I feel like she put a dagger through my heart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 540

You deserved it 115

Who's Afraid of Red, Yellow and Blue

By Anonymous - 28/09/2020 08:08

Today, I spent almost two hours drawing a scenery. I was tired halfway in and took a break. Came back to my room to see it getting scribbled on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 987

You deserved it 129

SHUSH

By Anonymous - 05/03/2023 12:00

Today, I went to see a movie with my mum. She kept asking me questions throughout the entire film, and not necessarily about the movie. I lost my cool when she asked me a bit too loudly for comfort if I regretted being dumped my ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 951

You deserved it 123

You get what you give

By Anonymous - 17/02/2026 22:00

Today, because of my wife’s inability to keep her nasty opinions to herself, the last of our children told us via text that they won’t be visiting anymore, or letting us see our grandchildren. So now it’s just me and her, financially trapped in this marriage until one of us dies of old age. FML

I agree, your life sucks 528

You deserved it 150

Corporate policy gone wild

By Fatasfk - 20/02/2026 12:00

Today, I found out I was overlooked for a promotion because apparently I don’t have the same body type as the other girls on that unit. This explains why I’m always cropped or completely left out when they post group photos on the company website. FML

I agree, your life sucks 443

You deserved it 96

Scammed

By Anonymous - 08/03/2023 12:00 - United States - Austin

Today, I noticed my credit score increased by 30 points. Not understanding why, I checked credit karma and found out someone opened several credit cards in my name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 961

You deserved it 91

Honest mistake

By Anonymous - 10/10/2020 11:01

Today, my girl and I with got caught having sex in the car by cops. They thought we were smoking bongs because the windows were foggy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 908

You deserved it 873

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The Top

Today, I slept with my deputy manager. He slept with my insane jealous housemate months ago. I need to find a new job and a new flat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 775

You deserved it 21 291

Today, I was throwing rocks into a pond while our class was on a field trip. The teacher started to pass around an old rare civil war bullet. As the bullet got to me, I threw another rock in the river, only to notice a rock in my hand and the bullet gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 533

You deserved it 62 997

Today, I showed up at my brother's house for a visit. Little did I know, there was a family gathering. My best friend was invited and I wasn't. She's "more fun and less awkward" than I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 006

You deserved it 3 513

Today, I come home to find my nephew holding pieces of my new $3,500 Sony Video Camera. He told me he threw it out the window because it was a portal for aliens. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 846

You deserved it 4 449

Today, I sneezed so hard I herniated my back. After passing out from the pain I awoke on the floor covered in my own shit and piss. Unable to move, I had to wait in this state for four hours for my wife to return home from work, clean me up and take me to the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 812

You deserved it 2 832

Today, my mum and I were moving the last of  my stuff into my new flat when I heard some creaking. The sound was  coming from the bathroom, so I went to check it out. As I stepped  through the door, the floor collapsed and the bathtub and I fell  right through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 940

You deserved it 124