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Danger zone

By Anonymous - 25/04/2026 12:00 - Canada - Ottawa

Today, despite repeatedly telling the nurse I'm severely allergic to NSAIDs, she insisted she give me Advil for my high fever. When I told her I would go into anaphylactic shock, she said, "Well you are in the right place to go into anaphylactic shock!" and then told the doctor I was refusing treatment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 507

You deserved it 67

Cut off

By Anonymous - 25/09/2024 06:00

Today, a friend told me he no longer wishes to be my friend, not because I did something, just because he no longer looks forward to seeing me, counts down every minute until a socially acceptable time to leave, and is always thinking up excuses to either be late or not come at all. Wow, just wow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 496

You deserved it 189

Silver linings

By 10 years, 0 dates - 28/11/2020 11:03

Today, I wanted to ask out this cute girl I used to work with. Before I could, she said she likes my only friend there, and asked if could I set them up. Trying to be nice guy and good friend, I did. Then she made her complete lack of interest in me obvious. But hey, at least the gay guy she hung out with thought I was cute. FML

I agree, your life sucks 860

You deserved it 172

They see me rolling…

By CharlieP - 08/05/2023 22:00

Today, I’m walking around the streets with my stuff in a rolling suitcase. My mom saw fit to kick me out of the house because she found sextoys in my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 210

You deserved it 249

Booty non-call

By Alex - 15/12/2020 13:58

Today, my girl sent me a naked booty pic, telling me not to be late home. When I got home, she was in dirty old sweatpants, too upset for sex because her celebrity crush died. Not in real life, in one of the TV shows she's watching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 819

You deserved it 272

Say it, don't spray it

By Anonymous - 05/10/2024 12:00 - United States - Warren

Today, as I was trying to get into the grocery store, I had a sneezing fit. I've typically never had one, so I didn't really know how to handle it. This one was a new record: 11 sneezes and I hadn't had the foresight to bring tissues. FML

I agree, your life sucks 360

You deserved it 103

Stylish

By Anonymous - 10/05/2023 10:00 - United Kingdom - Yate

Today, I went to a friend's wedding, only to realize I'd forgotten my dress shoes. I ended up wearing my pair of Converse Chuck Taylor's with my suit and stood out like a sore thumb in all the wedding photos. FML

I agree, your life sucks 315

You deserved it 704

Is that even legal?

By Monkeys aren't pets - 08/12/2020 05:04 - United States - Millersville

Today, I found out in addition to the ADHD teenager they scream at, my boyfriend's parents are planning on getting a monkey. I work at an animal shelter, so now I'm obligated to have a long conversation with them about what a crap idea that is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 906

You deserved it 120

'Tis always the way

By Christine - 09/10/2024 09:00 - United States - Gary

Today, I found out that my manager has been stealing my ideas. The worst part? He made me work overtime to complete the project that I originally proposed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 438

You deserved it 78

Assumptions

By Blue Lemon - 13/12/2020 20:01

Today, I was at a job interview and thought the guy interviewing me was a bit of a perv because he kept staring down at my cleavage. Afterwards, I realised what he was really looking at: the wire in my bra had popped out and had been poking right through my shirt like a dagger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 119

You deserved it 302

You OK, mate?

By Anonymous - 20/05/2026 09:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I have genuinely lost a day out of my week. It is currently Sunday, but yesterday I was at work on Friday, so where did my Saturday go? I genuinely have no memory of Saturday. I went to bed Friday and woke up Sunday, and now I’m scared. FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 72

Wouldn't you?

By Anonymous - 28/05/2026 00:00 - United States

Today, I found out that my son (17) lied about not being able to get the time off from his job for our family vacation and has been partying and screwing his girlfriend while we're thousands of miles away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 105

You deserved it 500

Just a dream…

By alaska - 30/05/2026 03:00 - United States - Aurora

Today, I had a dream that my mom hugged me and told me she loved me. I woke up to her banging on my door, barging into my room, inspecting it, and then telling me to “just fucking kill yourself, because you're genuinely a bad person” before slamming my door. My room was perfectly clean and tidy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 600

You deserved it 70

Get on with it

By Anonymous - 04/03/2022 14:00 - Malaysia - Shah Alam

Today, my superior, who went to meet with client yesterday, told me I needed to prepare a detailed list of changes to enhance the design of a marketing video, and refused to tell me the client's feedback they received, then told me I should figure it out myself. It's the weekend, and they want it by Monday morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 972

You deserved it 82

Swindled

By Anonymous - 05/04/2022 18:00

Today, I found out that a two-day job I helped my dad do for his old friend was actually a job for a real customer, who paid my dad £4500. All I got for my two days work was coffee and Co-op sandwiches for dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 304

You deserved it 144

Cranking

By Little tears - 02/01/2021 23:05 - United States

Today, I was so sad and lonely that I drunkenly masturbated to Game of Thrones scenes featuring Petyr Baelish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 389

You deserved it 931

Chub rub

By Anonymous - 02/06/2023 00:02 - Canada - Toronto

Today, trying to exercise and be more healthy, I went for a walk but I developed a friction thigh rash. The rash is so bad I will likely not be able to get on another walk for days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 747

You deserved it 202

Suffer little chives

By Anonymous - 31/12/2020 23:01 - Germany - Zittau

Today, I found out where the puddle in the basement came from. I thought the freezer was broken, but no. My mom is running what can only be called a death camp for vegetables in there. She buys them, then forgets about them until they turn liquid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 016

You deserved it 77

Wait for me!

By Anonymous - 03/01/2021 01:58

Today, the parking shuttle for work pulled away right as I was walking up to it. I was late to work. For the second day in a row. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 738

Viewer discretion advised

By Jane - 09/11/2024 00:00 - United States - Encino

Today, I was super bored in health class so I decided to watch Invader Zim on my computer. I never made sure my headphones were connected. so the whole class turned and stared at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54

You deserved it 704

Baby steps

By Anonymous - 17/11/2024 03:00 - United States - Warren

Today, I started doing cardio at my local gym with a basic exercise bike because doing weightlifting by itself wasn't having an effect on my weight. Since I'm out of shape, I did 15 minutes instead of the standard 30. I had to stop at 10 minutes because my legs were so sore they nearly gave out on me when I stood up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 349

You deserved it 154

Damned if you do…

By Anonymous - 25/03/2022 10:00

Today, I woke up early to do the dishes and clean up, after having people over yesterday. Now my wife is mad at me because I didn't stay in bed with her longer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 962

You deserved it 112

Fighting talk

By Anonymous - 22/11/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, my best friend called me a slut during an argument, and I couldn't stop myself from laughing. She lost her virginity at 13 years-old, and all four of her kids have a different dad. When I mentioned it, she gave me a black eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 715

You deserved it 188

SK8 OR DIE

By Anonymous - 15/03/2022 02:00

Today, while skating to school, I got hit by a car, In front of the school. I went flying and everyone saw. The girl who hit me only said, "Oops, didn't see you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 116

You deserved it 127

By Kev - 23/05/2019 04:00

Today, after a number of other automotive misadventures, I tried to find out why my radiator fan decided to quit working. That's when my hood struts thought it would be a good time to give way. Now I have big bruise on my shoulder where the latch hit me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 625

You deserved it 156

Quiet life

By Anonymous - 10/12/2024 12:00

Today, my parents told me that unless I think about my behaviour and make some real changes, people are going to think I’m weird or suspicious, and I’ll never make friends. This is because I choose to attend church on Sundays instead of watching TV and getting drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 451

You deserved it 314

The ripple effect

By Healthcare - 09/12/2024 03:00 - United States - Salem

Today, my dad is freaking out because he thinks he's next on the list of targets the NYC CEO shooter has. Not because he himself is a healthcare-ruining CEO, but he's a pharmacist who gets death threats every week from patients he can't give medication to, due to insurance companies denying everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 612

You deserved it 93

By Awkward Jeff - 26/05/2019 12:30

Today, I was home alone, so for fun I put red lipstick on. A few minutes later, my doorbell rang. I managed to get it off before I got the door. I saw my neighbor, and had a long conversation with him. After which, I came inside and realized I had lipstick all over my teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 433

You deserved it 802

Childcare

By Anonymous - 13/12/2024 09:00 - United States - Anaheim

Today, I never know who’s going to have my kids during their dad’s weekend. He drops them off with just anyone as he goes partying, but calls the cops if I pick them up early. Last week they were with his girlfriend’s brother; before that it was her uncle, and before that her cousin. All total strangers to the kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 619

You deserved it 95

Guess that's a "No thanks" then

By Anonymous - 21/07/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, I tracked down my long-lost daughter after losing her to foster care 26 years ago when I was on drugs. I knocked on her door and introduced myself, going in for a hug. She maced me and physically kicked me back into the hall, threatening a restraining order if I ever spoke to her again, and slammed the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 98

You deserved it 908

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The Top

Today, my French wife chose the name of our unborn baby girl. She wants to call her Fanny and won't change her mind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 951

You deserved it 5 320

Today, I thought it was a good idea to flush the stink bug I found in my kitchen. Later I went in the bathroom to take a crap, and next thing I know, I feel a stink bug on my privates. I guess it didn't flush after all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 029

You deserved it 8 733

Today, I went to the local street fair and ran into my boyfriend of five years. He was with his girlfriend of ten years. We both had no idea about each other. His family knew we both existed, and never said a word. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 645

You deserved it 144

Today, I, a 20-year-old man, was ridiculed and called "Granny" for having a coin purse. Said coin purse actually belonged to my late grandma, and she gifted it to me last year when she realized she was going to die soon. She really meant well and I appreciate it, but I wasn't ready for judgmental strangers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 593

You deserved it 119

Today, I felt so rejected by my wife that I can't help myself but feel like shit. She has bipolar, is on medication, yet she makes me feel so little that emotionally and physically that I've started to feel like a failure. No intimacy, shitty behaviour, complaining all the time. Man, I wish I could end it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 443

You deserved it 75

Today, my grandmother is upset I won't lie to the police for her and is now claiming that I'm involved in the Mafia. FML

I agree, your life sucks 370

You deserved it 61