Wake Up Call By FML Approved - 07/10/2017 03:00 The most frustrating sound ever. I agree, your life sucks 465 You deserved it 89 Share Tweet Share
Today, I found out that the reason my boyfriend hasn't texted me recently is that he'd forgotten he was dating anyone. FML I agree, your life sucks 47 319 You deserved it 5 678
Today, I saw a man on my bike that was stolen a few years ago. I asked him if I could have my bike back just wondering what he'd say. He calmly replied, "Hell no, I stole this fair and square." FML I agree, your life sucks 61 851 You deserved it 6 536
Today, I watched in horror from the other room as my boyfriend picked the biggest, slimiest booger I've ever seen, then lowered it into his mouth, and licked his finger clean. I very nearly threw up. FML I agree, your life sucks 22 196 You deserved it 2 725
Today, after the girl I fell head over heels for asked me out last night, it turns out she was so drunk at the time, she doesn't remember and doesn't want to date me at all. I'm beginning to feel like my life is some shitty movie. FML I agree, your life sucks 938 You deserved it 121
Today, I was stuck in an elevator with my workplace crush for 10 minutes. Trying to break the silence, I nervously said, “I’ve always thought you were amazing.” She smiled and whispered, “I thought you were the new maintenance guy.” I work in marketing. FML I agree, your life sucks 372 You deserved it 172
Today, I'm going to get my first tattoo. Too bad it's inside my colon so the surgeon can mark the section to remove. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 607 You deserved it 108
This is usually followed by the "plotting their demise knowing that you will never actually act on it" phase.