Health: Today, the airport security guard told me to lift my fat rolls... - FML

By Anonymous - 17/07/2010 06:16 - United States

Today, the airport security guard told me to lift my fat rolls so he could finish patting me down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 675

You deserved it 47 235

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Same thing different taste

By muffintop - 11/07/2011 02:34 - Canada

Today, I was standing at airport security. One of the bag inspectors asked me to remove my travel pouch, pointing to the lump under my shirt. I didn't know how to tell him that it was just one of my fat rolls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 199

You deserved it 13 582

By jennyygrace - 11/07/2009 00:16 - United States

Today, I was walking through airport security when a guard began making lewd gestures at his crotch, while looking at me. I was outraged until I realized he was trying to tell me that my fly was down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 615

You deserved it 41 664

By GothicbunnyxC - 28/01/2012 23:31 - Canada

Today, I was going through airport security. Trying to get things over and done with quickly, I dropped my pants without a second thought. Turns out they just wanted me to remove my shoes and belt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 669

You deserved it 35 481

By thebickster - 06/03/2009 17:58 - United States

Today, I was boarding my flight when I got pulled aside for looking suspicious. As she was opening my bag, I said, "Be careful, I jammed so many clothes in there it may explode." I was then strip searched for my trouble. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 578

You deserved it 49 792

By sufia - 29/09/2016 11:14 - Pakistan

Today, I was traveling. At airport security, the woman patting me down felt something "down there" and asked me what I was wearing. I told her it was a sanitary napkin. She put her hands inside my pants just to be sure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 370

You deserved it 1 182

TSA

By androgynous - 30/03/2009 17:44 - United States

Today, I was going through airport security. As my bags were being scanned, I was told that I was selected for extra searching. Right as the security guard was about to frisk me, he froze up and asked me, "You're a male, right?" I am, and I used to think that it was obvious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 590

You deserved it 4 762

Never joke with TSA

By missy - 16/06/2011 02:42 - United States

Today, I missed my flight because I was held in airport security because I'd "threatened" an employee. He had confiscated my eyelash curler and jokingly I asked if he thought I was going to curl him to death. He didn't laugh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 042

You deserved it 10 120

Smugglers unite

By atang - 09/04/2009 09:16 - United States

Today, I was leaving a clothing store when the security guard stopped me and demanded that I surrender the clothing I was "trying to steal" by hiding it under my shirt. It turns out, he was just looking at my pot belly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 956

You deserved it 11 458

How much?

By Anonymous - 21/07/2009 06:06 - United States

Today, I was at the airport to catch a plane. It was very crowded at the gate and there was nowhere to sit except for a flat metal bench, so I sat on that. Turns out I was sitting on a luggage scale, so my weight was displayed for everybody to see. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 297

You deserved it 47 057

By A continent away - 02/09/2014 19:48 - Estonia - Tallinn

Today, the security at the airport were nice enough to remind me to take the laptop out of my bag. I wish they'd also reminded me to put it back in before I left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 991

You deserved it 13 799

Next

Top comments

ArtIsResistance7 1

Saturday 17 July 2010 20:19

Time to do some good ol' fashion exercise... Put your hands up to the ceiling, bend your knees, and touch your toes. Do your daily exercises, you're gonna look like skin and bone. :)

Monado 0

Saturday 17 July 2010 20:20

Were you too big to fit through the metal detector too?

Comments

Griggy 0

Sunday 17 October 2010 14:32

You live in Pennsylvania... I'm sure you're not the first person he's said that to...

Tpain297 0

Saturday 12 March 2011 3:49

Haha, your one fat ************.

mrwelsh3 0

Monday 28 March 2011 6:40

that's ******* gross you deserve no sympathy

sykokitti 15

Thursday 7 April 2011 4:56

wtf? they're allowed to do that? I cant do that job that's so mean! get a walking buddy and get your sexy back on! my cousin did it so can you! go get em girl I have faith in you!

slushpup9696 12

Friday 3 June 2011 8:06

Well, you deserve it for having fat rolls. Nobody sits by you and forces cake down your throat, right? Of course, she could have a medical condition, but usually fat is just from not exercising and not eating healthy.

staymintyfresh 13

Thursday 9 June 2011 6:49

YDI so much. not saying your horrible for being fat, you just have to see these things conning.

MendelPotok 0

Friday 8 July 2011 16:43

Man oh man, that's gotta hurt! p90x workout program Honey, you'll get rid of those rolls.

calivianya 29

Tuesday 24 January 2012 2:53

I just read yesterday that TSA agents at one airport insisted on examining someone's colostomy bag. I'm pretty sure the TSA only hires psychopaths.

shinshoku13 19

Monday 20 February 2012 0:17

Ouch! Were you in canada? Were so mean sometimes with regard to airport security

LolaSoLovely 0

Friday 5 October 2012 2:43

I'm really sorry about what happened to you and all these hateful comments. no one on here knows enough about you to judge you because of your weight, for all we know you could be a diabetic. Show some humanity you dogs.

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Today, the police searched my house because my neighbors thought we were aiming a gun with laser sight at them. We were only getting our daft dog to chase a laser light around; we don't even own any guns. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 827

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Today, I was chatting with an amazing guy online. He was perfect for me. After five hours he told me he loved me and I said it back. So than we decided to trade nudes. I sent mine. Within two seconds my niece calls, laughing her ass off, telling me how weird my birthmark is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 205

You deserved it 109 680

Today, I was supervising a training exercise at work, where everyone had to wear microphones. One guy was congested and I got to hear six hours of sniffling, snorting, coughing, throat clearing, and mucus blowing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 215

You deserved it 47

Today, trying to do a good deed, I gave a homeless guy a $10 bill. As I walked away, he yelled after me, "You fucking bitch!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 444

You deserved it 3 718

Today, during a moment of silence at a wedding, my phone rang at full volume. My ringtone? The Jurassic Park theme. Everyone turned to stare as I fumbled desperately to shut it off. The bride spent the rest of the ceremony giving me the side-eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 92

You deserved it 684

Today, I had somewhat of a nervous breakdown, and poured my heart out to a doctor, who seemed to be well over 60. She looked at me, flabbergasted and said, "I never met anyone with that many problems!" Gee, thanks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 548

You deserved it 253