Love: Today, I told the woman that I've had a crush on for some time...

By Anonymous - 09/11/2009 04:13 - United States

Today, I told the woman that I've had a crush on for some time how I felt. She laughed so hard that water sprayed from her nose and hit me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 628

You deserved it 2 924

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Same thing different taste

By um...no? i don't think so anyway - 15/12/2013 19:16 - United States - Warren

Today, I finally got the courage to tell the girl I like how I feel. She instantly burst out laughing and said "A crush? Dude, what are you, 12?! Hahaha!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 546

You deserved it 6 314

By john - 28/01/2009 23:02 - United States

Today, the girl who I have had a crush on for two years snuck up from behind me and gave me a hug. I farted very loud at the same exact time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 856

You deserved it 5 157

Doofus

By Anonymous - 02/02/2025 22:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I was talking to my crush when I laughed so hard that I snorted. Then I tried to play it cool by saying, "I do that on purpose sometimes." Now he probably thinks I fake-snort for fun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73

You deserved it 512

Rom-com

By Anonymous - 15/10/2020 11:02

Today, I finally got the courage to tell my best friend who I'm crushing hard on that I like her. She gave me a look of revulsion and asked if I was joking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 182

You deserved it 169

By hcditfi5foygy - 23/07/2018 19:04

Today, my crush confessed their love for me, and I happily told them that I felt the same way. They looked uncomfortable, so I asked why. Apparently they'd been paid to prank me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 520

You deserved it 294

By Nice guy finishing last. - 07/04/2017 12:00

Today, I saw a girl I have a crush on sitting on a fountain, away from everyone. I thought this would be the perfect time to make a move on her. I tapped her on the shoulder, which scared her. She nervously flenched and began to piss herself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 400

You deserved it 941

Falling and laughing

By Jane_Elle02 - 18/10/2025 09:00

Today, I finally told my crush I liked him. He smiled and said, “That’s sweet, but I thought you knew I was seeing someone.” I laughed awkwardly and said, “Of course, I was just joking!” Then I immediately tripped over my own bag while leaving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 343

You deserved it 97

Jumping the gun

By mygirlnoloveme - 04/08/2023 08:00

Today, I told the girl of my dreams that my love for her was deeper than the ocean. She laughed hysterically. This wouldn’t be so bad but we happen to be dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 353

You deserved it 621

Assumptions

By FreeTacos_ - 28/10/2015 05:23 - United States - Pueblo

Today, I told my crush that I liked her a lot. She told me not to message her when I'm drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 552

You deserved it 2 735

What's so funny?

By Puleksy - 14/08/2023 14:00 - Poland - Brzeg

Today, I said to my significant other, "I think I'm a pretty good catch." She started laughing so heavily that tears came out of her eyes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 699

You deserved it 228

DoNuTizPrOnuT 0

Monday 9 November 2009 9:56

bitch, show her the backhand

cerebellum_fml 0

Monday 9 November 2009 10:08

Her losing fluids for you is a good thing buddy. Its a wonderful thing.

Comments

mizanonymous 0

Monday 9 November 2009 17:21

op there are girls with more control of their bodily fluids out there. And wetdream... Get help. Get lots of help.

shudashuia 0

Monday 9 November 2009 18:19

fire in the hole ....

serpent0042 0

Monday 9 November 2009 21:24

Could be worse, when my dad first asked out my mom she kicked him in the nuts.

cadillacgal79 32

Wednesday 9 July 2014 3:42

What happened to just blushing?

ColdGold 6

Monday 9 November 2009 21:50

So how you feeling now? (after telling her your feelings) So did you even know this person?

sammy6597 0

Monday 9 November 2009 23:47

you have good taste (y). ..:L

Plumppotato 3

Tuesday 10 November 2009 0:11

the big question that everyone seems to be missing is... was she actually drinking something or did water randomly shoot out her nose?

FerrariCake 2

Tuesday 10 November 2009 1:00

You're in luck... women always say they want a guy who can make them laugh.

sterlbott2 0

Tuesday 10 November 2009 1:06

Your pathetic.

Yodelmeister 18

Saturday 17 September 2011 13:32

What about his pathetic?

ilikecookehs 0

Tuesday 10 November 2009 3:09

lulz thats funny. I hope you got revenge.

razzlemyfrazzle 0

Tuesday 10 November 2009 4:09

how is that....how is that possible to have that much nose power to squirt water all over your face??? o.e

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Today, I was helping a customer when she asked if we were open on Christmas eve. I wasn't sure, so I asked my manager. My manager looked me over and said, "Yes, we will be open. Thank you for volunteering to come in." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 675

You deserved it 4 297

Today, while delivering pizza I was yet again given $0.04 over the total bill and told condescendingly to "keep the change." This happens on every shift. My pay is reduced during deliveries, and I drive my own car, and use my own gas. For $0.04. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 111

You deserved it 817

Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed and took the pain medicine that the oral surgeon prescribed for me before bed. The pain actually did go away for the most part, until my stomach decided to betray me and make me throw up, forcing my jaw to open more than it could after surgery. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 718

You deserved it 285

Today, I went to Walgreen's for a tub of Vaseline. The old guy at the counter looked at me, winked, and said, "Not having too much luck with the ladies, eh?" He was right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 090

You deserved it 13 988

Today, I paid $5000 for a new fence in my backyard for my dogs. My dog escaped three hours after the contractor finished the fence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 151

You deserved it 4 507

Today, my mum came over and helped me sort out my spare room. It was great, we found so many things I'd forgotten I had! Including anal beads. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 659

You deserved it 1 031