Health: Power move

Power move

By Ow - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Golden Valley

Today, due to my short temper, I punched myself in the nose because I wouldn't stop sneezing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 524

You deserved it 60 075

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Same thing different taste

By Ahhwtf - 18/08/2009 11:47 - United States

Today, my nose was itchy. As I reached towards it to itch it, I sneezed ridiculously hard. I punched myself in the eye and now it's all purple and puffy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 747

You deserved it 9 816

By Manly Sneeze - 07/07/2016 11:34

Today, I would like to say I pinched a nerve throwing punches, but no, I did it by sneezing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 109

You deserved it 1 534

By Anonymous - 01/10/2011 11:44 - Sweden

Today, I sneezed so hard that I hit my head against the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 221

You deserved it 6 116

By SkinsCastSelection - 17/01/2011 20:13 - France

Today, I broke my nose by sneezing too close to a table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 345

You deserved it 7 581

By HWS - 15/04/2011 05:47 - Canada

Today, I sneezed so hard I fell down the stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 316

You deserved it 7 782

Powerful

By ouchmynose - 18/02/2009 02:43 - United States

Today, I kneeled down to tie my shoe and sneezed, nailing my face onto my knee and breaking my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 309

You deserved it 7 100

Faulty plumbing

By Anonymous - 09/02/2024 06:00 - United States

Today, after just waking up, I sneezed, which caused me to piss myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 456

You deserved it 120

By jellybean - 06/11/2009 23:37 - United States

Today, there was something itching me in my bed, it was the tag to my pillow case. I ripped it off, very hard and slipped and punched myself right in the face. I broke my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 821

You deserved it 11 019

Rough patch

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I had a cold and was vomiting. I sneezed really hard, smacking my nose onto the toilet seat. I woke up a few minutes later with my nose bleeding, painful, and still stuffy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 483

You deserved it 2 896

By SierraDiaz2097 - 23/03/2013 05:44 - United States - Vardaman

Today, I sneezed. My boyfriend told me to shut up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 647

You deserved it 9 668

Immortal_Toaster 23

Friday 18 April 2014 18:11

That's snot very fun..

Pleonasm 35

Friday 18 April 2014 18:13

Did you then punch yourself in the heart because you wouldn't stop bleeding?

Comments

G_bear24 9

Friday 18 April 2014 20:48

Hahaha wow you sure showed your nose who is boss!

EastyBeasty 4

Friday 18 April 2014 21:02

That was just stupid.

pratikp03 22

Friday 18 April 2014 21:27

Why...just why?

pandalover69 26

Friday 18 April 2014 21:28

ydi dumbass

ahippienamedrae 10

Friday 18 April 2014 21:52

Even an idiot nose not to do that.

cmm06241 3

Friday 18 April 2014 21:59

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

olisykesdick 6

Friday 18 April 2014 22:03

This sounds like me..

buckdharma 37

Friday 18 April 2014 22:17

I hope you never suffer from premature ejaculation.

jw833055 13

Friday 18 April 2014 22:34

I kinda hope he does.

foreverfilthy__ 10

Friday 18 April 2014 22:19

Hahaha!! This is the best fml I have ever read!

ravens42 8

Friday 18 April 2014 22:23

What the hell is wrong with you

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The Top

Today, while walking home I was jumped by two guys, one of whom shouted, "You shouldn't have run your mouth off, Rick!" My name is John. Only after they repeatedly axe-kicked me in the chest did they realize their mistake. It now hurts to breathe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 149

You deserved it 3 248

Today, my daughter called for me to come into the bathroom. Turns out the tummy ache she'd been complaining of was actually parasites in her digestive tract. I could swear they were looking at me from the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 893

You deserved it 5 306

Today, it was boiling hot so my boyfriend and I decided to sunbathe in the garden and ended up falling asleep for a few hours. Not only is my back so burnt that I can't lie down, I also have a white hand print on my upper back where my boyfriend had left his arm while we slept. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 671

You deserved it 45 688

Today, my boyfriend and I went to a Taylor Swift concert. At the concert they put up a sign that said "Scream if you love country boys." My boyfriend took one look at it and started screaming. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 934

You deserved it 12 462

Today, I realized that in order to get a girl, I have to lose 100lbs and/or get facial reconstruction. If I meet a girl, we get close, I do everything to make her happy, only to be told, “I only like you as a friend.” I also get told that I’d make a “great boyfriend” yet they don’t choose me. Being overlooked sucks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 372

You deserved it 353

Today, my ex got mad at me because I made her shut up. She started a new job six months ago in sales, and all she does in the time we have to work in a team as volunteers is whine about her customers. She even started treating us (other volunteers) like her customers, to the point that we feel uncomfortable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 291

You deserved it 89