Poopoo peepee, Pranks and Kids: Nice try, kiddo

Nice try, kiddo

By AvengedSevenX - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, I came home from work and went into the bathroom. I saw a poo on the toilet lid, and thinking it was a trick toy that my son had got to trick me, I picked it up. It wasn't a toy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 072

You deserved it 25 790

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Same thing different taste

Work sucks

By Anonymous - 08/07/2011 19:43 - United States

Today, I'd just finished cleaning the bathrooms at work when I saw a young boy go in. Of course, I thought nothing of it until I had to use the bathroom myself ten minutes later. The kid had taken a shit and missed the toilet completely. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 438

You deserved it 2 649

Squishy or non-squishy?

By Rune - 09/02/2026 09:00

Today, I went to the bathroom. On my way back, I found a small piece of trash in the hallway so I picked it up. It was cat poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 365

You deserved it 110

By what if I'm being eaten from the inside out? oh my god - 05/04/2013 18:51 - Singapore - Singapore

Today, I took an incredibly painful dump. After I cleaned myself up, I got up and was about to flush, until I saw something moving around in one of the logs of poop. It looked like an earthworm. It wasn't there when I sat down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 730

You deserved it 4 845

HOW VERY DARE YOU?

By Fear of the unflushed…for life, the sentencing. - 10/06/2023 15:00 - United States

Today, I pooped in a drug store bathroom but forgot to flush. I left to go find my mom and found her in the toy section. I guess after I had walked away oblivious, a woman had walked into the bathroom behind me and found the kids I'd abandoned. She then came and found my mom and me, then yelled at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 176

You deserved it 1 295

By CrapDay - 18/01/2017 22:00

Today, I woke up early in the morning when it was still dark to go off to work. I saw what looked like a piece of slime that my children would play with and went to pick it up. Nope. Turns out it was puppy shit. Wet, slimy puppy waste. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 191

You deserved it 1 808

WHO ARE YOU?

By Anonymous - 05/01/2020 03:00

Today, I was on the toilet and jumped when I saw a face at the window. It was my own reflection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 483

You deserved it 789

Spooky season has begun

By Anonymous - 04/10/2019 00:01

Today, I was at work at a kiosk in the mall when I smelled something foul. I thought it was the weird dude who'd just walked by so I just carried on with my work. Minutes later, I looked to my right and there, lying on the floor a few feet from me, was a huge turd wrapped in toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 649

You deserved it 167

By Anonymous - 09/05/2009 03:03 - United States

Today, I woke up and went into the bathroom and noticed a dark mass in the toilet. Thinking someone took a dump and didn't flush, I approached the toilet ready to dispose of it. That's when I noticed its whiskers and ears. It was a rat, and it was alive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 944

You deserved it 3 576

By Anonymous - 21/11/2014 00:43 - United States

Today, I dropped my trash into what I thought was a garbage can. My co-workers stared at me like I had just pissed myself. It was a toy collection box for children in foster care. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 941

You deserved it 10 909

Natural selection

By Anonymous - 29/11/2024 20:00 - Canada - Minnedosa

Today, while eating dinner, my child picked up a piece of their chicken off the floor and put it in their mouth. It wasn’t until during bath time did I realize it wasn't chicken but poop that fell out of their diaper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 202

You deserved it 432

Boston_4_Life 3

Friday 3 February 2012 18:57

Shit happens

hoedang 3

Friday 3 February 2012 18:57

haha if it looks like poo, smells like poo, is warm like poo, it's probably poo

Comments

Coffeebang 17

Friday 3 February 2012 21:51

OfficeNinja 5

Friday 3 February 2012 22:37

It wasn't a toy, but it was a trick!

Jorcar 8

Friday 3 February 2012 22:44

Because if there's questionable poo on A TOILET, it has to be the fake kind. Smart.

MtnBkr00 8

Friday 3 February 2012 22:47

crappy day huh?

arvale8802 1

Friday 3 February 2012 23:15

Didn't it smell though?

crazyblackchick 0

Friday 3 February 2012 23:17

I guess -puts on sunglasses- you take crap from anyone. YEEEEEAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!

raywhite 5

Friday 3 February 2012 23:43

Pooped on.

DDbaconcrazy 1

Friday 3 February 2012 23:49

Oh shit

glittergloss014 3

Saturday 4 February 2012 0:02

Talk about a shitty situation...

THEREALISTUCE 2

Saturday 4 February 2012 0:33

Did the turd smell like roses or something! YDI!

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Miscellaneous Shopping Relatable Transportation Embarrassing Clothes Job interview Work Annoying Food Health Dentist Cats Neighbours Animals Family Depression Mental health Pregnancy Smartphone Money Thief Argument Love Bikes Cars Pranks Weird Awkward Spooky

The Top

Today, my parents were out so I invited my girlfriend over. It was the afternoon, and things started to heat up. We were having sex, and I was about to finish. Then I looked through the window, to see a construction worker (who was fixing the house next to mine) giving me a thumbs up. He's her dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 196 865

You deserved it 34 784

Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into my mouth. Turns out I had just popped a pimple on his neck. Into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 739 151

You deserved it 496 187

Random

Today, my house is on lockdown. I recently moved to Georgia from Rhode Island to be with my boyfriend. The state is on high alert for an ice storm. I'm stuck inside with my terrified boyfriend, who's calling it "the storm of the century". I used to walk to school in this weather. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 739

You deserved it 5 872

Today, my boyfriend and I celebrated our anniversary at the park. I was watching him play around with the wood chips on the ground and thought I saw him making a heart being romantic, so I got on top of the playground to look. Turns out it was the balls of a giant penis, complete with pubes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 922

You deserved it 4 144

Today, I was at a Chinese restaurant, I'd forgotten my glasses and had a migraine. I was straining my eyes, squinting and rubbing my temples to alleviate my migraine. I was kicked out of the restaurant and banned henceforth because my waitress thought I was mocking her eyes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 85 509

You deserved it 10 686

Today, my mom asked me, “Why in the world are you attracted to your boyfriend AT ALL if he isn’t rich?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 994

You deserved it 97

Today, I've finally accepted that my parents do not love me. They constantly do things that I hate, then casually remark to other people, "I think he's mad at me now." They also know my hearing is insanely hypersensitive, yet they're still obnoxiously loud for no apparent reason all the time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 783

You deserved it 238

Today, and every time I don’t feel like having sex with my boyfriend, he audibly jerks off, and passively aggressively moans to try and guilt trip me into doing it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 369

You deserved it 699