Miscellaneous: Low blow

Low blow

By Anonymous - 02/04/2009 10:28 - United States

Today, we sparred for Tae Kwon Do. I forgot my cup, but I didn't think anyone sucked enough to hit me below the belt. Five seconds into a match, some girl knees me in the Hacky Sacks. After writhing in pain for 30 seconds, I got back up to spar. I didn't think she sucked enough to do it again. She did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 076

You deserved it 31 060

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Same thing different taste

Cobra KO

By WeakBitch - 18/02/2018 15:00

Today, during a judo session, I was paired with a thin, frail-looking rookie. Before a mock skirmish, as I'm much bigger, I said I'd take it easy on her, but also to give it her best shot. She immediately threw me on my face to the floor, knocking me out cold in 7 seconds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 782

You deserved it 7 675

By Karate Kid - 25/05/2012 06:29 - Australia - Surry Hills

Today, I was showing some new karate moves in the park to my friends. I mimed a punch behind a girl walking past to show my technique and control, but she must have seen me. She turned around and kicked me in the stomach. To add insult to injury, her technique was better than mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 979

You deserved it 35 418

They call him Mighty Force

By Stiny - 01/06/2011 18:44 - United States

Today, I got kneed in the stomach by a sixth grader. I couldn't breathe. I have a black belt in Taekwondo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 306

You deserved it 15 647

Boxed in

By Anonymous - 26/02/2025 17:00 - United States

Today, at sparring, I got paired up with a girl, who said, "Don't go easy on me because I'm a girl!" Thirty seconds into the match, she was on the floor whimpering and crying. Now everyone is whispering and glaring at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 455

You deserved it 145

Not fair!

By Anonymous - 26/03/2025 11:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was practising kicks with a a woman in my MMA class and for some reason she dropped her pads to ask me a question at the last second, and I kicked her in the jaw. I got banned from the class for not being careful. She’s the one lowered the pad in the middle of practice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 481

You deserved it 112

By filipinoclari808 - 16/04/2009 06:47 - United States

Today, I was horsing around after my big test. Someone punched me softly on my back. Figuring it was my friend, I turned around and did a roundhouse kick. It was my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 802

You deserved it 81 470

By Mayyouneverfindpleasureinavagina - 01/06/2013 04:31 - United States - Garden Grove

Today, at karate, my sparring partner thought it was completely okay to surprise kick me in the vagina. When he saw me doubled over in pain, he was completely surprised. Apparently, he thought that it wouldn't hurt, because I have no penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 257

You deserved it 5 278

By Anon - 09/01/2013 19:27 - United States - Southbury

Today, I was laughing at a girl who really sucks at badminton. Turns out she has anger issues, and a really good aim when she's mad. I've never been hit so hard in the crotch before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 536

You deserved it 64 298

MMA FML

By ThatEndedWell - 07/01/2019 22:00 - United States - Staten Island

Today, I decided to challenge the jerk jock at work to a fight, since he kept poking fun at me for being a weakling. Having started taking MMA classes, I was confident I'd make him eat his words. Just my luck, he's an MMA instructor and kicked my ass effortlessly. Not what I had planned. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 177

You deserved it 4 633

By tom28402 - 22/02/2015 23:21 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, I competed in a Tae Kwon Do competition. I came third with my team in the sparring event. My mum said as a joke, "Were there only 3 teams?" There were. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 715

You deserved it 4 528

Finnboghi 0

Thursday 2 April 2009 20:04

She's a bitch. Once is your fault. Twice is hers.

lovely_189 0

Thursday 2 April 2009 20:05

stupid bitch, punch her in the boobs :D

Comments

llama 1

Monday 6 April 2009 7:36

immediate "add to favourites"

meow_meow_fml 0

Monday 6 April 2009 17:27

well your fault but next time punch her in the breasts

NizuMalfano 0

Monday 6 April 2009 23:11

#6 I agree but instead of shanking her, I would follow her to her house and: 1: Scare her kids at night by standing outside the windows dressed as a freaky monster OR 2: Crap on her driveway.

tkdhkdmaster 0

Tuesday 7 April 2009 2:54

Anyone who says he shouldn't have been close enough for her to knee him obviously has no idea of offensive strategies in TKD. I'm a third degree black belt in it and one of the best ways to evade kicks is to move in. The problem with this is newcomers may throw knees... Oh and #156: I love you. There is no better strategy than anything Maddox tells you.

Epic_Fail_Sauce 0

Tuesday 7 April 2009 3:21

@ 163: HAHAAHHAHA, or, break into her house and dump on her chest

mattz_fml 0

Tuesday 7 April 2009 8:03

You should have ******* killed her.

srslyfucked 0

Tuesday 7 April 2009 8:54

You're the fool here. Even skilled people kick each other in the balls on occasion. (Though she sounds a bit out of control.)

srslyfucked 0

Tuesday 7 April 2009 8:56

Also, #164 is right. One of the best TKD defensive strategies is to be inside the person's reach where they either can't hit you or can't score a valid point.