Fishing Break Brake Fail! By FML Approved - 07/09/2017 03:30 Easy living isn't always easy... I agree, your life sucks 591 You deserved it 190 Share Tweet Share
Today, I went to the game with my boss and some people he does business with on his tab. I got so drunk that I blacked out, threw up all over the table, and passed out in the bathroom. I woke up alone with my body reeking of vomit, and no phone. FML I agree, your life sucks 8 542 You deserved it 76 927
Today, I had to get a prostate exam. Right before the doctor started, he told me that if I found it awkward at all, I should just imagine I was being probed by aliens. FML I agree, your life sucks 25 083 You deserved it 2 423
Today, I went into the farm where I work. Within the first 30 minutes I slipped on a fresh cow pie and broke my ankle. FML I agree, your life sucks 3 377 You deserved it 373
Today, I made out with a handsome man in the restroom at a party. There was a knock on the door, interrupting us. It was his girlfriend. FML I agree, your life sucks 2 941 You deserved it 1 445
Today, for our 25th anniversary, my husband and I had dinner on a cruise ship, a dinner we had been planning for months. Upon boarding, I realized the expensive dress that I had bought just for the occasion had exactly the same print as the chair covers and the carpet. The cruise lasted 8 hours. FML I agree, your life sucks 44 655 You deserved it 6 327
Today, I tried playing chess with my wife sober, and remembered why we only play while I'm trashed drunk. She's so bad, I have to be on the precipice of alcohol poisoning to even enjoy playing with her. Otherwise, it's like playing a 2 year-old. FML I agree, your life sucks 286 You deserved it 1 055
Looks like that car's sleepin' with the fishes.