Love

GOT brain

By Anonymous - 03/09/2026 09:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I went on a date with a cute Scottish guy from Tinder, who kept on referring to himself as "FROM THE NORTH" like he thought he was in Game of Thrones or something. I like the show too, but I sure didn’t appreciate being called a "SOFT SOUTHERNER" when I talked about being born in Plymouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 287

You deserved it 112

Humblebrag from Hell

By Anonymous - 03/09/2026 03:00 - Canada - Surrey

Today, a mutual friend of mine told me that I could do much better than my girlfriend. I ended up asking her who would want to date me. The next thing I know, she was all over me. Needless to say it didn’t take much for her to tempt me and we ended up screwing like rabbits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57

You deserved it 305

Hetero blues

By Anonymous - 03/09/2026 00:00 - United States

Today, I have a major crush on my coworker and I hate it because he's s gay and happily married to another man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 133

You deserved it 321

Grudge

By Anonymous - 02/09/2026 15:00 - United States - Rialto

Today, it’s like we’re living the dumbest most petty version of Romeo and Juliet ever. My daughter’s boyfriend’s father forced his son to break up with her because the dad and I dated for a year way back in high school. I left him for another guy and apparently he never got over it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 332

You deserved it 111

What would you do?

By Anonymous - 02/09/2026 03:00 - United Kingdom - Taunton

Today, I realized I've fallen for my best friend. Private conversations suggest she feels the same, but around others she dismisses love as "stupid". I don't want things to become awkward, but I feel like I should walk away instead of burying my feelings to maintain the friendship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 308

You deserved it 121

Not going back

By FHL too. - 02/09/2026 00:00 - Mexico

Today, I found my ex on Bumble for the second time. She lives with her husband, whom she married a decade ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 281

You deserved it 98

Counterproductive

By Olive - This FML is from back in 2008 but it's good stuff - France

Today, and for the last two weeks, I have been preparing my girlfriend for a break up with nasty remarks. She has been finding me exceptionally funny. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 377

You deserved it 41 291

Smooth operator

By Anonymous - 01/09/2026 03:00 - United Kingdom - Norwich

Today, I used a men's hair removal cream to be smooth for my partner, as a surprise. It turns out that doing that made her think I was cheating on her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 311

You deserved it 88

What would you do?

By Devastated - 31/08/2026 22:00 - Norway - Oslo

Today, my husband told me that he could not love me without sex. My love for him is utterly unconditional. My heart is just broken now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 275

You deserved it 382

Paranoid

By StillBetterThanTwilight - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Minneapolis

Today, my boyfriend told me that he had once been possessed by demons, and that he now sleeps with a knife under his pillow for protection from, "The dark spirits that are feasting upon his soul." I'm not sure that I'll be sleeping over anytime soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 895

You deserved it 2 670

With friends like these…

By dreadedmafia86 - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was upset after my boyfriend and I broke up. My best friend heard and told me she would be right over. Three hours of waiting later, she stumbles in wasted. She had been at the bar, with my ex, making sure he was okay. For me, I just got a list of all the drinks she had that night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 415

You deserved it 2 550

The ex conundrum

By Anonymous - 30/08/2026 03:00 - United States - Boise

Today, an ex professed her love for me. Over the last couple of months I've been talking to another ex, who I'd give damn near anything to be with again. Both cheated on me, and, thinking about it now, my only thought is, "WTF is wrong with me?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 240

You deserved it 276

Plus one

By Partyofthree - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff

Today, I work at a private pool where I can get up to six people in for free. Naturally, I invited my crush. She brought her boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 596

You deserved it 1 335

NEXT!

By M - 29/08/2026 03:00 - United States

Today, I realized that, after waiting until I was 29 to be in a serious relationship, I got with a guy that turned out to be exactly like my abusive piece of shit father. Why? Why God? FML

I agree, your life sucks 326

You deserved it 178

Wife REALIZES her husband is HIDING sick secret

By Alone - 29/08/2026 00:00 - Singapore - Singapore

Today, my wife was all on board with having kids… until she started obsessively following the Lindsay Clancy case. I just got divorce papers, and when I demanded answers, she said the case made her not want to be a mom and wife anymore. Fuck you, Lindsay Clancy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 396

You deserved it 177

TMI

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2018 but it's good stuff

Today, I told my boyfriend that I loved him. Being dumped wasn't the reaction I was expecting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 198

You deserved it 252

Bad timing

By Anonymous - 27/08/2026 12:00 - United Kingdom - Leatherhead

Today, after I filed for divorce, the papers were received by my soon-to-be ex-husband on our wedding anniversary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 90

You deserved it 387

Dangling

By Anonymous - 27/08/2026 00:00 - United Kingdom

Today, while making out, my clean-shaven husband pulled away because he could feel my lip hairs tickling him. I thought he was making a joke so I called him a tosser and walked away. Later I checked in the mirror and there they were, two black hairs swinging in the breeze right under my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 156

You deserved it 285

Fleeting

By Anonymous - 26/08/2026 00:00 - United States

Today, I took my step-kids and left my abusive husband. I've just been informed that I'm being accused of kidnapping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 370

You deserved it 195

I'm out

By Anonymous - 25/08/2026 12:00 - United States - Chino

Today, I had to make the heartbreaking decision to end my engagement after my fiancé agreed to let several of his obnoxious family members move in without even asking me. He says 'family over everything' but what does that make me? To make matters harder, I just found out I’m pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 471

You deserved it 76

The X Files

By EmbarassedAF - 25/08/2026 03:00 - United States

Today, I found an old USB drive in a drawer and spent the afternoon going through the files, expecting embarrassing photos from school. Instead, I found a spreadsheet I'd made at 16, listing every person I had a crush on, complete with rankings and notes. I'm now terrified someone will find my “Top 10” list. FML

I agree, your life sucks 173

You deserved it 213

The gap

By Anonymous - 24/08/2026 03:00 - United States - Rockford

Today, someone asked me if I was my boyfriend's little sister, just because of our height difference. He's 6'2", I'm 4'11", and this is the fifth time it has happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 286

You deserved it 108

Sorry seems to be the hardest word

By Anonymous - 23/08/2026 00:00 - Thailand - Nakhon Pathom

Today, my husband accidentally smashed a Pickleball straight into my nose at high speed and the pain dropped me like a sack of potatoes. I’m still waiting for a hug and an “I’m sorry babe” from him. That alone is more painful than my nose right now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 398

You deserved it 76

Living my best life

By Anonymous - 22/08/2026 12:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I sent my crush what I thought was a cute selfie. Two minutes later, she replied, “Nice waffle.” I checked the chat and realized I had sent her a photo of my burnt breakfast instead. She then asked if the black part was chocolate. It definitely wasn't. I have not opened that chat since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 92

You deserved it 344

The one that got away

By Anonymous - 22/08/2026 00:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my ex invited me to dinner where we had a wonderful time. She even picked the first restaurant I'd took her to, and just as I was considering asking her to get back together, she tells me that she’s engaged and didn’t want me to find out from Facebook. I swear the chefs heard my heart break. FML

I agree, your life sucks 362

You deserved it 126

This is awkward…

By Anonymous - 20/08/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, my brother and I spent almost $600 to plan and throw a divorce party for our mother. She proceeded to announce that she and our dad are staying together and that we completely jumped the gun. We deserve it, but… FML

I agree, your life sucks 116

You deserved it 390

Basic

By Sheldon Cooper says what? - 20/08/2026 09:00 - United States - Rialto

Today, my boyfriend is pissed at me and went so far as to equate it to cheating that I went out to eat with some friends. I’d love to go to a restaurant with him but he refuses to eat anything other than beef, cheese, white bread, and chicken nuggets. That man has the palate of a 4 year-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 389

You deserved it 118

For better and for worse

By Anonymous - 20/08/2026 00:00 - United States - Euless

Today, I'm getting a divorce after only three months because my wife accepted a job transfer that would require us to move across the country. I'm sorry but I do not want to be away from my kids or my family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 343

You deserved it 155

Ravage me!

By Anonymous - 19/08/2026 20:00 - France

Today, wildfires are unfortunately ravaging a place dear to my heart, and displacing people. My family decided to offer accommodation to displaced people. That’s the story of how the man I am secretely in love with ended up sleeping in my bed and me, not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 289

You deserved it 89

It's not me, it's you

By Anonymous - 19/08/2026 12:00 - United States - Suffolk

Today, after I tried to break up with my boyfriend, he said he won't give up on us and asked me to go to therapy. According to him, “You might need medication for how you feel.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 374

You deserved it 80

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Airport Suspicious Transportation My ex Love Awkward Weird Embarrassing Singing Work Miscellaneous Relatable Mysterious Creepy Scary Plumbing Confused Health Healthy Lifestyle Smoking Ironic Anger issues Dogs Animals Grandparents Cute Kids First Dates Family Pregnancy

The Top

Today, my best friend and I came home from Japan. Her boyfriend and I have been having an affair before I left so I decided not to tell him she was coming with me. We just got off the plane and got a bite to eat, he was waiting for me so he could propose, my best friend was standing next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 561

You deserved it 226 268

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

I agree, your life sucks 400 223

You deserved it 46 172

Random

Today, my teenage daughter asked me to buy her the morning after pill, saying, "It's for my acne." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 827

You deserved it 5 137

Today, I was at my aunt and uncle's house. I went to the bathroom and after I washed my hands, I took a Q-tip out of the carton to clean my ears. When I reached for a second one, I noticed that every Q-tip in the carton was actually already used. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 274

You deserved it 8 269

Today, my dog was diagnosed with depression. I got him to help with my depression. I guess we can just be miserable together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 343

You deserved it 3 111

Today, I saw my crush working the only open till at the grocery store. When she saw me approach her queue, she immediately called for more cashiers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 152

You deserved it 3 622

Today, I went into a music store to look into getting a new guitar. I picked up one that I was interested in and tried it out quietly. A sales representative approached me and asked me to "stop the noise and leave the guitars for serious customers." I've been playing for almost ten years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 868

You deserved it 6 030

Today, I left the living room for 3 minutes to make a coffee. When I went back, my 4-year old had found a permanent marker, God knows where, since I don't own a permanent marker. She'd then drawn on her face, the carpet, wall, sofa, both dogs and as an added bonus the TV screen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 009

You deserved it 555