dragonkyng

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Glendale, United States of America
35 years-old
Monday 21 May 1990
single

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Dragonkyng's favorite FMLs

Run for the hills!

By kringr - 06/06/2011 00:52 - United States

Today, I went to my high school reunion. I was super excited to see what everyone had done in their lives. The nerdy guy I bullied is now a U.S. Marine and already has two deployments in Afghanistan under his belt. He looked at me in his dress blues and said, "I remember you." FML

agreeclassic 13 258

vote type 1 135 236

Close but no cigar

By Anonymous - 23/12/2015 23:26

Today, while lighting a cigar, I set my beard on fire. FML

agreeclassic 18 617

vote type 1 15 143

By fishtities - 13/08/2015 02:01

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. I was depressed so I went to the only bar in town. When I asked for a drink, I found out she works there as the bartender. FML

agreeclassic 26 034

vote type 1 6 087

fishtities app_comment_confession_title

fishtities 26

Thursday 13 August 2015 16:53

OP here. We had been together for over a year now. Turns out she had been cheating on me for a month and decided to brake things off with me. The reason I didnt know she was the bartender there was because she was recently hired and since I dont usually go there nor did she tell me, I didnt know.

By pudh - 05/08/2015 11:08 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, my girlfriend and I were making love. It got hot and intense and we were really into it, until she blurted out, "Oh baby, rub your penis against mine". FML

agreeclassic 33 622

vote type 1 3 891

pudh app_comment_confession_title

pudh 0

Thursday 6 August 2015 2:02

Author's comment (pu): For the record, I did not make her feel crap about it. We laughed about it for hours before posting it on FML.

By 18emikot - 04/08/2015 03:26 - United States - Big Lake

Today, my local USPS delivery man refused to deliver any more packages to my house, because in the past, my dogs have barked at him and he feels threatened. He also filed a complaint about our house because apparently my driveway has branches that, to him, are considered "hazardous." FML

agreeclassic 23 894

vote type 1 4 077

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18emikot 20

Tuesday 4 August 2015 16:02

We have a Chihauhau and a Springer. The Chihauhau rarely goes out and only has a few teeth left so I doubt she could hurt someone. Our Springer is a sweetheart, she's all bark but no bite. Whoever she goes out she wears a bark collar and the remote is always by someone's side. There are no protruding branches in our driveway. None. We trim them regularly.