tofuburger

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Tofuburger's favorite FMLs

By zero_minded12 - 21/05/2009 03:08 - United States

Today, I was at the mall blasting music. I was wearing a nice shirt, and had my iPod in my breast pocket. I noticed a cute girl smiling at me, so I smiled back and as she started to walk over, I turned down my music while smiling. It looked like I was rubbing my nipple. FML

agreeclassic 418

vote type 1 121

Sorry

By brokeforever - this FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Latvia - Riga

Today, I found out how much those tiny dogs cost when my German Shepherd ate one. FML

agreeclassic 36 130

vote type 1 12 936

By teapotrevolt - 02/03/2015 20:40 - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, while laughing at a jogger that fell down while running, I choked on my French fries. They had to give me the Heimlich maneuver. FML

agreeclassic 15 496

vote type 1 54 273

By kysier - 01/03/2015 23:36 - United States - Campbellsville

Today, I was turned down from the dream job that I was promised two years ago, once my chemo and radiation therapy was finished. His excuse? He never actually expected me to survive. FML

agreeclassic 50 463

vote type 1 2 436

By sam882 - 23/02/2015 06:49 - United States - Saegertown

Today, a man approached me and told me he wanted to drink my dirty bath water. FML

agreeclassic 38 193

vote type 1 3 792

sam882 app_comment_confession_title

sam882 28

Monday 23 February 2015 21:21

I was completely shocked and at the same time embarrassed. I had to just walk away, completely speechless. It took a moment to register with me that i actually heard that. haha