sparktheJay

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Sparkthejay's favorite FMLs

By Jebus - 24/01/2009 16:07 - Canada

Today, I brought a girl home from the bar. After sleeping together, she drunkenly stumbles to the bathroom to wash up. On her way back, she accidentally walks into my parents' room, turns on the lights and asks where her clothes are before figuring it out. FML

agreeclassic 9 127

vote type 1 34 815

Logic

By thyisnothorses - 29/04/2012 03:55 - United States - Scituate

Today, I was grounded by my mom because I had slept in past 11, when she wanted me to wake up at seven to do chores. According to her logic, I should have seen the note she left on the counter earlier this morning. FML

agreeclassic 32 262

vote type 1 3 106

By bananamuffin - 30/03/2012 19:13 - United States

Today, I realized that the "holla" tattoo I stupidly got on my lower lip five years ago isn't fading as I expected it to, and will probably contribute to my unemployment for years to come. FML

agreeclassic 7 012

vote type 1 74 065

By mrricecakes - 23/03/2012 05:55 - United States - Gilbert

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. Let's just say pubes and toilet paper residue were the least of my problems. FML

agreeclassic 53 446

vote type 1 5 240

By Sean - 03/03/2012 07:33 - Canada

Today, while my plane took off, I was forced to sit and watch as somebody rear-ended my car in the parking lot. FML

agreeclassic 34 663

vote type 1 4 734