_xxostacy

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_xxostacy's favorite FMLs

By bglenney - 15/08/2013 09:47 - United States

Today, for the first time in my life, I simultaneously sneezed, peed and farted. I was giving a presentation at work when this happened. FML

agreeclassic 56 955

vote type 1 4 192

By Anonymous - 10/08/2013 04:02 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I got a call from my son's kindergarten teacher. Apparently my son asked a girl to marry him. After she said no, he stabbed her with a fork. FML

agreeclassic 65 781

vote type 1 6 095

By (._. ) - 06/08/2013 20:35 - United States - Alburnett

Today, I asked out the man of my dreams. He told me he'd have to ask his dad if it was OK. I thought he was just kidding, until he pulled out his phone and called his dad. After a few minutes of "Come on, Dad" and "But why?" he hung up and said his dad wouldn't let him. He's 22. FML

agreeclassic 61 791

vote type 1 5 130

By Anonymous - 08/08/2013 11:10 - Latvia - Jelgava

Today, in the middle of examining me, my gynecologist suddenly took a sharp intake of breath and vomited on the floor. FML

agreeclassic 61 840

vote type 1 17 205

By AnnoyedByFriends - 08/08/2013 04:43

Today, my friends thought it would be fun to change my dad's name on my phone to my girlfriend's name. Guess who got an erotic text message when standing next to me while in the line to buy groceries. FML

agreeclassic 52 756

vote type 1 9 715