Failuretofly123

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Failuretofly123's favorite FMLs

Kids say the funniest things

By embarrassedmom - 18/05/2009 01:19 - United States

Today, my 6 year-old daughter saw a man in a wheelchair whose leg had been amputated. She walks up to him and says, "What happened?" He answers kindly that he's a war veteran. She then responds, "Well then you deserve to get your leg blown off. You shouldn't be killing people." FML

agreeclassic 104 588

vote type 1 25 983

By Anonymous - 12/04/2009 18:11 - United States

Today, I woke up to find The Sims 2 running on pause on my laptop. I unpaused to find my character and my boyfriend's were no longer together. Slightly confused, I went on to find the note my boyfriend left. It said, "I hope you can take a hint." I got dumped through a computer game. FML

agreeclassic 90 480

vote type 1 5 848

By dumbass - 01/10/2009 20:07 - United States

Today, my girlfriend told me she lost her phone and not to call or text her. After about three hours, I text her phone, asking if she found it yet. I got a reply, saying "Nope." FML

agreeclassic 46 803

vote type 1 5 883

I love my family

By unloved - 01/10/2009 14:25 - United States

Today, during an argument with my daughter, she screamed, "Everyone hates you!" and stormed off. I flopped down on the couch in frustration, where the cat jumped on my lap. "You love me, don't you?" I asked the cat. She crapped on my leg and went to my daughter's room. FML

agreeclassic 42 371

vote type 1 6 854

By Icy - 01/10/2009 06:59 - United States

Today, my crush was talking to me on Facebook. He said, "Did you know that 99% of the time a guy is talking to a girl it's because he wants to go out with her? Yeah, well, this is that 1%." FML

agreeclassic 46 750

vote type 1 3 726