stopdreaming

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Stopdreaming's favorite FMLs

By Anonymous - 29/05/2009 04:08 - United States

Today, I learned to never blast classic rock with your convertible's top down while passing an SUV full of gangbanger wanna-bes. That is, of course, unless you want your immaculate, newly detailed leather seats to be decorated with pretty brown and white milkshake stains. FML

agreeclassic 49 805

vote type 1 8 635

Communication breakdown

By Jen - 20/03/2012 05:11 - United States - Woodland Hills

Today, my new boyfriend asked why it takes me so long to reach orgasm. I didn't have the heart to tell him that he's never even given me one. FML

agreeclassic 35 023

vote type 1 7 328

Hush

By bitchyhiccups - 19/03/2012 13:14 - United States - Tempe

Today, I got a horrible case of the hiccups while at my friend's mother's funeral, resulting in me squeaking loudly every five seconds during the eulogy. My friend glared daggers at me until I left the room, then later accused me of being an insensitive bitch for "trying to ruin the funeral." FML

agreeclassic 32 373

vote type 1 4 516

By W45T3D_Y0UTH - 15/03/2012 20:44 - Canada

Today, I had just finished up at work. I was standing on a street corner, waiting to cross to get to my car on the other side. I had three people pull up beside me and ask me how much I charged. FML

agreeclassic 28 780

vote type 1 10 109

W45T3D_Y0UTH app_comment_confession_title

W45T3D_Y0UTH 6

Friday 16 March 2012 1:35

Nothing that makes me look like a prostitute. Makes one wonder how one could get mistaken for one at noon. In front of a cop car, no less.

By Bebefer - 15/03/2012 07:49 - United States

Today, my mother and I went to a meeting at my school about a camping trip the students in my grade will be going on. When the time to ask questions came, my mother raised her hand and loudly asked, "What if my child is on their period during the trip?" FML

agreeclassic 37 762

vote type 1 2 455