emeester

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Emeester's favorite FMLs

By duncan74 - 10/12/2014 03:23 - France - Balma

Today, my cats found a new game to play. They each sit on either side of the cat flap, and take turns hitting it. Clack, clack. Clack, clack. At 3 am. Clack, clack. Clack, clack. FML

agreeclassic 525

vote type 1 68

By allykat - 03/12/2014 00:56 - Canada - Brampton

Today, I bought my cat a fun toy at the one of a kind craft show. It has catnip in it, which he loves. He flipped out, so I took it away. He won't stop trying to break into the cupboard I put it in. My cat has a drug problem. FML

agreeclassic 32 320

vote type 1 5 715

By NairyAGoodIdea - 15/01/2015 21:05 - United States

Today, I tried to manscape with some Nair. Nothing helps the pain. FML

agreeclassic 25 704

vote type 1 10 244

By Anonymous - 14/01/2015 01:50 - United States - Wilmington

Today, we got a new Roomba. I set it to clean and came back an hour later to find shit smears all over the floor. Apparently, one of my cats had done his business in the kitchen, and the Roomba had dragged it around the entire first floor of my house. FML

agreeclassic 36 618

vote type 1 5 835

By con135 - 13/01/2015 01:16 - United States - Farmingdale

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first handjob. I was nervous, so when she went to do it, I panicked and yelled, "Firmly grasp it!" She then couldn't stop laughing because it was a line from SpongeBob. FML

agreeclassic 39 014

vote type 1 10 310

con135 app_comment_confession_title

con135 12

Tuesday 13 January 2015 15:38

Needless to say she still makes fun of me for this, when she asks me for something she will say something like,"can you firmly grasp that soda and hand it to me?"