the_burger_king

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louisville, america
28 years-old
Friday 04 April 1997
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The_burger_king's favorite FMLs

By mugged - 01/06/2010 23:41 - United States

Today, I got mugged by someone wearing a bear suit. FML

agreeclassic 399

vote type 1 46

Hey lady! Chill!

By Anonymous - 25/08/2011 21:17 - United States

Today, I was out shopping when an old lady bumped into me and dropped her purse. Trying to help, I bent over to pick it up, at which point she battered the shit out of me, called me a "filthy thief" and threatened to open an umbrella in my ass. What the fuck has the world come to? FML

agreeclassic 41 404

vote type 1 3 045

By skichick54 - 24/08/2011 05:28 - United States

Today, my house got watermeloned. Not egged, watermeloned. FML

agreeclassic 43 303

vote type 1 3 741

Backfired

By gir - 14/07/2011 19:35 - United States

Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML

agreeclassic 34 626

vote type 1 97 548

Secret Weeb

By chickennbenchpress - 31/05/2011 17:05 - Canada

Today, I was on my third date with a really hot girl. A guy walked by singing the Pokémon theme song. She started making fun of the guy, mocking his immaturity. I joined in, in order to keep the conversation going. Everything was going great but then my phone rang. It's the Pokémon theme song. FML

agreeclassic 18 074

vote type 1 81 614