cmuise

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Cmuise's favorite FMLs

By j0hn - 23/02/2009 02:35 - United States

Today, I saw my mom sneaking meat into her spaghetti sauce. She told me she sneaks meat into most of the food she cooks. I've been a vegetarian for 8 years. FML

agreeclassic 53 026

vote type 1 17 540

By Sam - 03/02/2012 04:00 - Canada

Today, I got punched by a man for making fun of his stutter. I didn't. I stutter too. FML

agreeclassic 43 563

vote type 1 2 670

By Anonymous - 02/02/2012 20:56 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend confessed to me that he purposely makes me angry, because when I'm angry, I clean, and it saves him having to do it himself. FML

agreeclassic 34 476

vote type 1 6 382

Smooth Operator

By kingpig - 02/02/2012 18:00 - Sweden

Today, I was on a date with a guy I've been crushing on. In the middle of the dinner, he said he had to go get something from his car. When I asked what it was, he smiled and said it was a surprise. I waited for my surprise for half an hour. Then I decided to pay the bill and go home and cry. FML

agreeclassic 60 051

vote type 1 3 764

By ABBenzin - 01/02/2012 16:11 - United States

Today, I was breaking into a house when three police cruisers pulled up. They ran my social, my license plates, and asked me twenty minutes worth of questions, before allowing me to go back to work. I work as a locksmith; the homeowner had lost their keys. FML

agreeclassic 41 466

vote type 1 3 790